# Help - Wife wants to get rid of our Golden



## mudEpawz (Jan 20, 2011)

im so sorry for your situation. as a last resort if you decide to surrender her, I would suggest looking into a local Golden Retriever Rescue. Rescue Groups for Golden Retrievers listed by State. 

However, I would really recommend trying every possible outlet before you surrender her. Is it possible to keep training her or enroll her in obedience training with your wife. it would help her control your golden and build a bond. 

If you are only absent for a few days of the month is it possible to find someone to look after your golden while you are away? Then when you are back you can continue to train her. I would contact vets, the golden rescue to see if there someone they could reccommend.


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## cgriffin (Nov 30, 2011)

Oh, wow!
I would also look into a Golden Retriever Rescue group. 

Training won't help with the seizures, though if you wife is unwilling to help with that or wanting to handle a seizure dog.

So sorry!


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## LeilaM (Sep 14, 2012)

Hi

You have gotten some good advice. I would second the suggestion for a dogs sitter type situation for when you are gone or as you mentioned a kennel for the weekends you are gone. I also agree that maybe encouraging your wife to spend time with the dog at obedience classes would be a great idea. Perhaps if you tried to frame it as time away from her other responsibilities it would help. 

I also wanted to say thank you for your service. As a former air force spouse I also know what it can be like to have a spouse gone and the pressures associated with being in charge of the house during those times. God Bless you both.


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## Bentleysmom (Aug 11, 2012)

I'm so sorry, I feel for you and your dog! Really bad spot to be in. Unfortunately dogs know when they're not loved my someone, you can't be fake around a dog because they know every time.
I would hate to see you have to give your dog up because I can feel in your post how much you love her. I've never had a dog with seizures but my nephew had them and for him stress could bring one on. I'm sure it's stressful for your dog to be home with someone that doesn't want her there.
I don't have a solution for you but I pray you can work something out that's best for you and your dog ♥


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## FeatherRiverSam (Aug 7, 2009)

I think you've answered your own question. Boarding your dog while you're away or perhaps leaving him / her with a friend. And training your dog with the help of a trainer...your wife might even find that fun. I can see where the seizures could be difficult for your wife to handle by herself.

I admire you for trying to make this work.

Pete


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## CStrong73 (Jun 11, 2012)

If you can talk her into it, I would suggest your wife take the dog to training classes. The classes are not just for the dog, but to help the owner learn how to understand and interact with the dog. I bet it would help the dog recognize your wife as an authority figure, and help give your wife more confidence around your dog. And any advice your wife receieves re: her interaction with the dog is coming from a neutral third party (the trainer) rather than from someone directly involved (you). 

I second the notion of framing it as time away from other responsibilities. Perhaps you could watch the other dog and baby, and make dinner on the nights she goes to class?

And in the meantime, find a safe place for the dog to stay when you can't be there.

Good luck! I do not envy your situation at all.


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## Megora (Jun 7, 2010)

I'd ask her what kind of example she's trying to set for that daughter. 

Something too difficult, ditch? Even if it belongs to a loved one....


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## Mayve (Aug 21, 2012)

I guess my question would be...does she want the dog at all...meaning if you put all this work into her (which I think she deserves btw) will it change the situation or are the seizures a deal breaker for her.

I am truly sorry for your situation, I don't believe that people go into getting a dog with the thought that they can just re-home it if it doesn't work out, no I believe they think it will be a life long love affair, and the decision to re-home is not usually an easy one.

If she is willing to deal with the seizures I would do everything and anything to keep her and make the situation better for your wife, you have gotten some really go suggestions, but if the seizures are a deal breaker I would find a rescue. 

Good luck to you and your family!!!!


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## PrincessDi (Jun 8, 2009)

Megora said:


> I'd ask her what kind of example she's trying to set for that daughter.
> 
> Something too difficult, ditch? Even if it belongs to a loved one....


I couldn't agree more with Megora! At one point you and your wife will probably be older and require some assistance. You are laying the foundation for your daughter's moral compas.


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## Wendy427 (Apr 4, 2009)

I did some research on canine epilepsy and found some info for you, including suggested supplements, etc.:

Taurine

Naturally Treating Epilepsy and Seizure Disorders - PurelyPets


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Josh*

Josh

My heart is breaking for you and your dog. I just sent you a visitor or private message.

Talk to your vet and see if you can board her there for the weekends you are away and make sure they have someone there all the time. The vet may also know of someone reputable that babysits pets and can watch them at their home.

If you have to get rid of her, please contact the Golden Rescues and also ask at your vet, maybe a vet or vet tech will adopt her. Hoping you can keep her!


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## Brave (Oct 26, 2012)

Mayve said:


> I guess my question would be...does she want the dog at all...meaning if you put all this work into her (which I think she deserves btw) will it change the situation or are the seizures a deal breaker for her.


You took the words right outta my mouth. 

My biggest concern is that your wife doesn't want the dog period and is not communicating that fully to you. I would ask her straight up, what would make owning this (joyful) beast a joy to her?

Would it be if she was better behaved? 
Would it be if she no longer had seisures?
What would it take?

If she just doesn't want the dog around b/c the dog doesn't listen to her - that can be fixed and you shouldn't have to re-home the dog. 

I empathize with your plight so very much! I'm sad you have to deal with it, but I am so proud of your determination and preservance. 

Let us know how it goes. We care about all in our midsts.


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## Wendy427 (Apr 4, 2009)

Here's another link here on GRF that has LOTS of info on seizures and how to treat them:

http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com...es/108429-seizures-101-basic-information.html


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## PrincessDaisy (Dec 20, 2011)

We need member Tailer'sFolks to get involved with this thread. She has a wealth of information on the seizures.

Also, anything that I would suggest would get lambasted by the ladies on the forum. But the daughter complicates that advise anyway. So, I'll just say, "Your dog will never abandon, forsake, or demand more of you than you can actually give."


Max, once burned


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## Dallas Gold (Dec 22, 2007)

I'm so sorry you are in this situation. My heart goes out to both of you. I can't help but feel that your wife maybe overwhelmed with her responsibilities right now- a child, another dog, your absences, and a dog that doesn't respond to her and has very frightening seizures that she may feel ill prepared to handle alone. Being responsible for a dog with seizures is stressful and I can see where she might feel overburdened by it all, especially if she isn't an experienced dog owner. I hope you can have a heart to heart conversation with her and ask if there is anything you can do or provide to possibly ease her burden and her fears so that you can keep the dog, with the idea she would be involved in training the dog to respond to her. In addition, perhaps your vet can help her with her anxieties of handling the seizures and get a game plan in action she feels comfortable with. Sometimes just booking an appointment with the vet, asking questions and having a vet show you what to do will make it easier. I believe if she beomes less anxious about these things, your dog will sense it and perhaps bond with her more.

If it just isn't possible to find a place for the pup while you are away or your wife just doesn't want to put forth the effort, I would suggest contacting a Golden Rescue. I know that Rescue a Golden of Minnesota does some intakes from your state, but I'm not sure where you are located and if you are in the area they serve. They are a fantastic rescue and will see to it your Golden finds the right home. 

Once again, I'm very sorry- my heart is breaking for your family. Thank you so much for your service to our country.


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## Shalva (Jul 16, 2008)

I am not sure how I feel about this.. as someone with a dog with epilepsy, it can be very stressful. I wonder whether your dog could be better controlled with the addition of potassium bromide and if you could get the seizures under better control if that would help your wife. I also think some training classes would be great but your wife would have to be a willing participant because otherwise it is still going to be you as the one he listens to and not her. The reality is that a sick dog and a young child with a husband that has to leave for weekends and other training is a lot and while I disagree with her in getting rid of the dog I do understand her stress level. I also wonder if these things are just excuses and she just doesn't want another dog or if she is really stressed out by the issues and if they were resolved would she be more devoted to the dog... I don't have an answer it is however a question and I think someone else posed the same question. 

I would not send the dog to the shelter they will not adopt him out there are to many nice dogs who need homes without medical issues, you might find someone privately who is willing to take the pup and there might be rescue folks that woiuld be willing to step in ...

I think your first order of business is to find out what is really bugging your wife... what is it about this dog that she can't deal with ??? not a fighting, guilt trip conversation but a down to earth sit down conversation... about what is really going on. 

I personally don't agree with the what is she teaching the kid approach...while I agree with what they are saying about just getting rid of things ... I am not sure that it is the best approach to take... i think a conversation with her is in order to really get to the bottom of what is going on. she sounds overwhelmed


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## TheZ's (Jun 13, 2011)

The suggestions of getting your wife involved in the training and having her meet with the vet for instructions on how to deal with the seizures make sense to me. We didn't have to deal with seizures but we did go through an extended period with our Zeke when my husband would say "you have to get rid of that dog". It took a long time for the bond to form but over time they became very close. I think the bond would have developed more quickly if my husband had learned the kinds of things a training class teaches you about communicating with your dog. Hoping for a successful resolution of your problem.


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## Lilliam (Apr 28, 2010)

Actually, for the sake of the dog....

If your wife doesn't want her then it's best for the dog to find a home where she will be properly looked after, with someone willing to accept the challenges of a seizure dog. 

I hate to say this. 

In this instance, for the dog's welfare, I believe she should be rehomed. A dog with that kind of challenge needs a home where there will be full acceptance and full hearted cooperation. When you're gone, she might not be getting that.

Terrible situation. I'm so sorry.


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## cubbysan (Mar 13, 2007)

I am wondering too if your dogs seizures can be better controlled. 

Also, I wonder if you even had a dog walker come to the house maybe two or three times a day while you were away, if that would be anough to tire your dog out so she wasn't in the way of your wife, and two, give your wife some space and peace while the dog was out on a walk.

I had a seizure dog that I did not medicate, the vet did not think the seizures were close enough. She had a seizure maybe three times a year. The last three years of her life she had none that I knew of. I often wondered if there was a trigger, such as medicine, house cleaners, or stress that caused them. I do know a couple stressful situations where she did have seizures that day.


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## OutWest (Oct 6, 2011)

I'm so sorry you're going through this. It's amazing to me the choices that our service men and women often have to make. Thank you very much for serving our country. 

I think you've gotten a lot of good suggestions. To me the most important would be the chat with your wife so that you and she are understanding how she feels. It sounds like the two of you have a busy and challenging family life. 

One thing I think would be worth investigating is finding another person or persons with an epileptic dog. If you keep your dog, it's quite possible there is someone in your community who would take him/her for a weekend a month. Perhaps your vet could identify some of his patients with epilepsy, etc. Its almost like you need to identify a small support group of owners of epileptic dogs. You could offer to care for their dog once in a while in return (schedule permitting of course). 

Good luck and best wishes! I hope you'll come back and tell us how you're doing.


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## mylissyk (Feb 25, 2007)

I'll just echo what others have said, if your wife will agree training is a great idea and she needs to be one to go to class and do the homework with the dog. It will do two things, the dog will be better behaved for her, and it just might build a bond she does not have with her right now.

The seizures are something none of you have control over, if your wife seriously does not want to deal with potential seizures you may not have a choice but to find the dog a new home.

If you need to find her a new home, please, please contact the Golden rescue groups in your area. They can and do take in dogs with medical conditions, it is the definition of "rescue". Most rescue groups operate with dogs living in foster homes with a family, the are not kenneled like a shelter. Rescue groups on the national list will provide provide all the vet care the dogs need, screen adopters and find the very best homes. So turning her over to a rescue will not have the dog sitting a kennel waiting for the end. She will be loved by a foster family while in the rescues care, and they will make sure she is adopted into a family that will be able to deal with her seizures.

I just wanted you to know, it is not an either or situation, either your home or a shelter where she is put down. Rescue is a beautiful and loving choice if you need it.

But I really hope you can talk with your wife and come to an agreement to at least make an effort to create a relationship between your dog and your wife, so that she can stay in your family.


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## JoshNy (Feb 9, 2009)

Thank you all for the responses, ideas, and links. This has been a hard topic for me to approach, but I appreciate all your help.


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## quilter (Sep 12, 2011)

Training is an excellent idea, but I'd wouldn't go with a general obedience class necessarily. I would identify the specific situations where you are having problems and have your wife train new behaviors in those situations. I've taken my dogs to many general obedience classes, and the training is very rarely mapped to day-to-day situations at home. The one exception was a puppy class taught by someone from Association of Pet Dog Trainers/Karen Prior Academy. The training was focused on pet behavior, not competition obedience behavior. (Note that I love, love dog school and am starting another class tomorrow!) 

I'm curious about the seizures and what exactly the problem is there. I had a collie that had seizures. While they were scary-looking and I'm sure the dog wasn't too happy about them, there wasn't anything about them that would make me give the dog away. There was nothing to do during a seizure except wait it out. Does your dog pee on the floor or bite or something?

One last thing. Avoid blaming the problem on your wife's "lack of authoritativeness." You won't be able to have a rational discussion once you trot that one out.


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## JoshNy (Feb 9, 2009)

She does urinate during the seizure that seems to have a stronger then usual odor, as well as salivate/foam at the mouth that gets into the carpet and is hard to clean up. 

I don't think that is the main problem though, it is just a piece of the puzzle. Overall, I think the problem is just a general lack of any bond between my wife and the dog.


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## Shalva (Jul 16, 2008)

JoshNy said:


> She does urinate during the seizure that seems to have a stronger then usual odor, as well as salivate/foam at the mouth that gets into the carpet and is hard to clean up.
> 
> I don't think that is the main problem though, it is just a piece of the puzzle. Overall, I think the problem is just a general lack of any bond between my wife and the dog.


I agree with you... I think that if they were bonded the seizures wouldn't matter and she would do whatever she needed to do to help the dog as any loving owner would but the fact that she has no bond with the dog makes her just a pain in the neck (the dog that is) that is why it is so important to really get to the root of the issue... what is really going on


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## JaimeNTJ (Aug 4, 2012)

One seizure once a month or less, is probably not the issue here. Poor doggy. 

How does your wife feel about the dachtsund?


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## SheetsSM (Jan 17, 2008)

Beside pursuing a rescue for placement, have you notified your girl's breeder? A reputable breeder will take the golden back. As for rescues, not all have foster homes, some rely on boarding so you need to take that into consideration when considering placing her.


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## DanaRuns (Sep 29, 2012)

I don't have anything to add to the good advice you've gotten. I'm sure you've thought about all of that before, though, and none of it sounded like an attractive option. I don't envy you, but I urge you to do whatever you believe is right, rather than what seems expedient.

For what it's worth, you sound like a great guy, and if I were a dog I'd want to belong to you.  (That didn't sound weird did it?)


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## JoshNy (Feb 9, 2009)

I had a long talk with my wife last night and good news. She has agreed to try going to an adult dog obedience class with the dog (Gabby) and I. I explained to her how her lack of involvement in Gabby's daily activity and lack of any training time with her leads to the disobedience when she is alone with her, but not with me. 

The problem also stemmed from her growing up with only outside dogs on a farm. I tried to explain to her that dogs are pack animals and need to be with their pack, not just stuck outside alone 24/7. I am going to have to get better at brushing her so shedding and general dog mess is less of a problem around the house, so there are areas we both need to work on. 

I explained to her that it will take some time and effort on her part to invest in training and hopefully that will help develop a bond between the two as well.

Thank you all for your advice and encouragement.


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## Mayve (Aug 21, 2012)

I'm glad you guys talked about it and have a plan of action. I hope this helps form that bond. Good luck to you and your family.


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## CarlosW9FE (Jul 17, 2012)

I'm glad you and your wife have come to an agreement on the issue.


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I read your original post and the replies you got from members, you were given some great advice. I am so very glad to hear your wife has agreed to go to the training classes with Gabby. You were in a very tough situation, I know how difficult that can be. Glad to hear things are looking up and I truly hope they continue to work out for all of you. I hope she will meet with the Vet also, hopefully this make it easier for her if/when Gabby has a seizure when you're away.

I'm sure you wife was feeling very overwhelmed. Having a young child is a lot of work, combine that with your schedule and Gabby's seizures, it can be overwhelming. 

Thank you for your service, I look forward to seeing updates, and hope the best for all.

Any pictures of your beautiful girl? Would love to see Gabby.


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## MercyMom (Dec 19, 2011)

I do recommend a personal trainer. I am not sure about the epilepsy though. Maybe you can find a specialist that will be able to migitate the symptoms more. 

Our Mercy although healthy, is having behavioral issues. I work away from home during the week in the city, which is 30 miles from our home town. 

My husband stays at home with our son. He is not experienced with dog care and training like I am. He often has to put her outside to get some sanity as he is also chasing out 3 year old all day.

My husband has threatened to send Mercy back to the breeder, but as upsetting as that sounds, I just let it roll off my back, because as an experienced dog handler, I know that a solution can be found. My husband is just bluffing most of the time.

Our professional trainer, Karen Peak is coming over tonight to help us with Mercy's uncontrollable mouthing.

Good Luck!


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## raqinmex (Nov 28, 2012)

I can really sympathize here. We have just adopted two rescue goldens who were abandoned in Mexico City. They are two years old. The male is an angel sent from heaven, however the female is the most obstinate dog I have ever seen. I feel we were never given the whole story of what happened to these dogs, but it would appear that the female, the obstinate one has been returned to the shelter several times at least. She had stopped eating from sadness and would have died had we not taken both of them. They are inseparable. 
So, I am at a loss as to what to do with her. Both of us have had extensive experience in animal training. Our last golden died in June of this year. She was a delight to be around, everyone loved her. The vet played a eulogy for her on my husband's guitar. 

So, the big question here is this. Has this girl dog's experiences scarred her for life, or should I enlist the aid of a dog trainer. I need to establish trust between us and love, and she's making it a bit hard for me. Stealing things, defecating and peeing in the wrong places, almost as if she is testing me to see if I'll send her away too. 

Any suggestions would be very much appreciated. I do not want to give up, but I also don't want an uncontrollable large dog in the house. We are both retired with bad spinal problems.


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## DanaRuns (Sep 29, 2012)

raqinmex said:


> I can really sympathize here. We have just adopted two rescue goldens who were abandoned in Mexico City. They are two years old. The male is an angel sent from heaven, however the female is the most obstinate dog I have ever seen. I feel we were never given the whole story of what happened to these dogs, but it would appear that the female, the obstinate one has been returned to the shelter several times at least. She had stopped eating from sadness and would have died had we not taken both of them. They are inseparable.
> So, I am at a loss as to what to do with her. Both of us have had extensive experience in animal training. Our last golden died in June of this year. She was a delight to be around, everyone loved her. The vet played a eulogy for her on my husband's guitar.
> 
> So, the big question here is this. Has this girl dog's experiences scarred her for life, or should I enlist the aid of a dog trainer. I need to establish trust between us and love, and she's making it a bit hard for me. Stealing things, defecating and peeing in the wrong places, almost as if she is testing me to see if I'll send her away too.
> ...


I don't have any magic answers for you, but I want to say THANK YOU for taking in those two dogs. 

I have adopted some very challenging dogs, with deep personality problems in terms of emotional difficulty and behavioral problems. Just so you know, in almost every case you can make them into relatively happy, healthy, loving dogs. I say "relatively" because sometimes the problems never go away completely. But they can be greatly reduced, and you can make them into good family members.

The most important two things right now are to just simply love her no matter what, and provide a safe and stable home for her. Safe and stable means a number of things. It includes being safe from your anger. It includes being safe from fear. It includes a routine that is enjoyable and dependable, and that you do every, single day. In time, she will come to realize that she's in a safe home that she likes, with people who love her, and it's forever. That last bit -- forever -- is really hard to communicate to a dog that has had its world changed over and over. It takes a lot of time. Sometimes years.

Giving her love, safety, stability and a sense of permanence might resolve a lot of her issues, just by doing that, without "training." Like the elimination problems and some of her stubbornness. Not to say she doesn't need gentle training, because she does. Part of what a dog needs to thrive are good, solid boundaries, and a set of known and reliable expectations. She may test those boundaries every once in a while for the rest of her life, just to make sure they are still there, but those boundaries -- in the form of gentle and loving corrections, along with positive-reinforcement for good behavior -- will give her a structure that she desperately needs and will come to love and rely upon.

I have a rescue I took in that was a feral dog and had been to multiple shelters. When we rescued him, he was on his last day before they were going to euthanize him. We came for a different dog, but when we learned about Dave (yes, Dave  ), we took him home. What a nightmare! He was so fearful he wouldn't approach us, or even his food. He hid. He barked. He bit. He guarded. He refused to be taught anything. He eliminated wherever he pleased. He destroyed anything he could get his teeth on. Today, about three years later, Dave is a good, loving dog who is happy, loved, healthy and secure. He's still a little fearful, but he never growls or bites anymore. He still doesn't always obey commands right away, but he can usually be coaxed into them when he's resisting. But he's happy and loving member of the family, overall.

You can do it. Have love, have patience, have small expectations. Give her love, give her safety, give her routine, give her expectations she can live with, give her consistency and give her permanency. She'll probably come around. Maybe not until 2015.  But she will.


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## raqinmex (Nov 28, 2012)

DanaRuns said:


> I don't have any magic answers for you, but I want to say THANK YOU for taking in those two dogs.
> 
> I have adopted some very challenging dogs, with deep personality problems in terms of emotional difficulty and behavioral problems. Just so you know, in almost every case you can make them into relatively happy, healthy, loving dogs. I say "relatively" because sometimes the problems never go away completely. But they can be greatly reduced, and you can make them into good family members.
> 
> ...



Many thanks. I have had extensive experience since the age of 15 when I received an abused and starved horse as a gift. He was absolutely hateful at first. Threw everyone off, especially me. Well it took about a year to get him rehabbed. He then went on to become a champion in hunter hack class. 
He also became the most beloved horse at the stable, but did maintain a hatred for life of one of the stable hands. 

I'm hoping I still have the patience and fortitude. I am pretty determined, but so is she. Today she is being an angel after a stern lecture from Mom last night.


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## mylissyk (Feb 25, 2007)

raqinmex said:


> I can really sympathize here. We have just adopted two rescue goldens who were abandoned in Mexico City. They are two years old. The male is an angel sent from heaven, however the female is the most obstinate dog I have ever seen. I feel we were never given the whole story of what happened to these dogs, but it would appear that the female, the obstinate one has been returned to the shelter several times at least. She had stopped eating from sadness and would have died had we not taken both of them. They are inseparable.
> So, I am at a loss as to what to do with her. Both of us have had extensive experience in animal training. Our last golden died in June of this year. She was a delight to be around, everyone loved her. The vet played a eulogy for her on my husband's guitar.
> 
> So, the big question here is this. Has this girl dog's experiences scarred her for life, or should I enlist the aid of a dog trainer. I need to establish trust between us and love, and she's making it a bit hard for me. Stealing things, defecating and peeing in the wrong places, almost as if she is testing me to see if I'll send her away too.
> ...



Thank you for taking in these two dogs. I don't think your girl is testing you. She just has never had anyone show her what they want from her, and probably doing things that she had to, to survive, or worked to get her what she wanted. 

Please do get a good, positive method trainer to help you work with her. I guarantee you when you build a relationship, gain her trust, and she starts to understand what you want you will have the most loyal, devoted companion you can imagine. 

Kindness, consistency, and understanding and she will learn.


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## OutWest (Oct 6, 2011)

JoshNy said:


> I had a long talk with my wife last night and good news. She has agreed to try going to an adult dog obedience class with the dog (Gabby) and I. I explained to her how her lack of involvement in Gabby's daily activity and lack of any training time with her leads to the disobedience when she is alone with her, but not with me.
> 
> The problem also stemmed from her growing up with only outside dogs on a farm. I tried to explain to her that dogs are pack animals and need to be with their pack, not just stuck outside alone 24/7. I am going to have to get better at brushing her so shedding and general dog mess is less of a problem around the house, so there are areas we both need to work on.
> 
> ...


Hey, good luck! I'm glad you and your wife have come to an understanding and I hope Gabby's epilepsy can be helped in some way. We would love to see pictures of Gabby if you have the chance! Please come back and let us know how it's all going.


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## SheetsSM (Jan 17, 2008)

Saw on your other thread that you're ready to start the puppy search. I do hope your wife is on board with puppy raising as golden pups can be challenging to say the least.


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## Tayla's Mom (Apr 20, 2012)

I will second that. Tayla was the biggest challenge of my dog owning life. At almost 2 she is turning into a great dog, but my husband still has issues with her because he is not into training and it shows. Good luck.


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## olliversmom (Mar 13, 2013)

At one time, my late husband worked 2 jobs and was never home. I worked part time and had three children under 7, 2 young dogs, 10 puppies and a few cats thrown in for good measure. Their care was all on me.
While none of my pets had health issues, those were some stressful times for sure.
The only thing that kept the dogs and the kids properly trained, happy and healthy was my love for them and the knowledge that I would do anything for those I loved. 
I get that seizures can be very stressful. I get that you are away 1 weekend a month and she has a small child and the seizure dog.
But what I also think is she does not feel love for this dog, or she would be trying to make it work. If she has lived with a dog for 4 years, and would even think to rehome it, she can't now, and wont ever, love that dog. Dogs grow on you after awhile. Or not.

So, you're in a tough place. Cause sounds like u love the Golden and she doesn't. In the end, something's gotta give. I've seen marriages almost break up because of fighting over their poorly trained dogs behavior. 
And the dog ends up the big loser in the battle. 

My vote would be to try and find a loving, caring home with people who can devote time and effort and all their hearts to training her properly and working with those seizures.
Good luck.


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## PrincessDi (Jun 8, 2009)

*Copied and pasted from Puppy Section.*

*Looking for a puppy, are you all rich?* 
I have read all the guides and visited several breeders websites. Maybe times have changed. Looks like almost $2000 to find a dog whose parents have hip, elbow, eye, and heart clearances? I will have a very hard time talking my wife into letting me get a $2000 dog...

I understand you get what you pay for, mostly, and just lost my dog due to health problems. Parents weren't certified etc. But sheesh.

Can you really not find a puppy from healthy parents for under $1000? Maybe I need to get a second job and save up for a few years. 

I'm very sorry for the loss of Gabby and can definitely appreciate that you would like to adopt a puppy golden. I do hope that you wait or that you decide not to adopt. Your wife obviously was not committed to Gabby. Raising a puppy to an adult can be quite challenging and requires 100% commitment of both parents. There are no real health guarantees regardless of clearances.There are no guarantees that there won't be health challenges, like epilepsy or many other health issues that can happen with the breed. It is unfair to the dog if both partners are not committed. 

It is very rare that you will ever see me leave a post like this, but I feel that you need to evaluate your situation and what level of commitment you *and your wife can provide.*


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