# Good bye to my first dog :(



## Stefan (Aug 18, 2012)

I've written many times on this forum about my golden retriever Ollie who is doing fantastic and is the first dog that I've really bonded with... This post however is about the first dog I and my family ever had - Sammy a 14 old Maltese x bichon frise who unfortunately we had put down last week due to a number of ailments including a cancerous tumour and just the general shutting down of his body.. He was 14. 

He was a good boy who asked for little but to be loved and he definitely was.

A part of me feels guilty in that I never shared the same bond that I do with my golden Ollie (who I got almost two years ago now when I was 25 and do absolutely everything with) and somehow I find myself thinking about all the things I wish I had have done, made more of an effort to do etc with Sammy and it just makes me feel really down. 

I can't imagine how people feel when a dog they really bonded with passes away or put to sleep and I dread the day I'll have to say goodbye to my Ollie but that's a long way off. 

For now, sweetdreams to Sammy, we miss you but we'll see each other again  xx 


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## ang.suds (Apr 1, 2014)

Hi Stefan, 
It is a very painful process to lose a beloved dog. I'm so sorry to hear about Sammy. The fact that you are eloquently expressing how you felt about him shows that you really loved him and I'm sure he felt that love from your family. It's a normal feeling to rehash things with guilt about what we could have done, should have done, etc. The ironic thing is that dogs enjoy the moment and find bliss in the little things that we often take for granted. Sammy had that rare opportunity that so many others don't have, of growing old with a great loving family. Try to remember the positive things and know that you are not alone in your feelings. 
The best of us have guilt but we learn over time to accept and remember the great things that we did share.
I had a lot of guilt when Jack passed away about what I should have done or could have done. I found it helpful, when I was stronger, to write down a list of all the positive memories we shared and look at all the happy smiling pics of him.
Sending big love and hugs your way. Give Ollie a big squeeze. Sammy, rest in peace sweet boy.


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## kellyguy (Mar 5, 2014)

Sorry for your loss. I know feeling guilty after losing a pet is just one of the normal reactions of grief. It's also not unusual to develop different levels of attachment with our dogs, they all have personalities and while we love them all not every one will bond to us in the same way.


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## dezymond (May 3, 2012)

Sorry for your loss. 

14 is a nice long life and I'm sure he loved every second of it. We can only do so much for our beloved fur friends when they're up in that age. 

There's also no bond like a bond with your first dog and I truly believe that.


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## AngieAvenue (Mar 17, 2013)

Aw  
Keep you memories close in your heart!


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## mddolson (Jul 10, 2012)

My heart goes out to you. It's hard to loose a friend after that many years. We had to put our Husky (Romeo) down, just 2 years ago. He was 13 years +10 months.
His health was failing also.
I still miss him.

Mike D


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## Stefan (Aug 18, 2012)

Thankyou for your comments, I really appreciate them  it's Saturday morning for me here now, going to take Ollie out for a play at the park.... You're comments really made me feel better, thanks a lot  

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## ang.suds (Apr 1, 2014)

Have a great time at the park with Ollie!!


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## Jennifer1 (Mar 31, 2012)

I'm very sorry for your loss.


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## Anon-2130948gsoni (Apr 12, 2014)

It's easy to beat ourselves up after we lose one of our older pets--I certainly have. Part of the natural dynamic is that older dogs are usually just less demanding than the younger guys--they're well behaved, they sleep a lot, and they're perfectly content just to hang out and enjoy their days.
I have no doubt from the way you write about Sammy that he was well-loved and had a good life. Be kind to yourself.
I'm so sorry for your loss.


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## janababy (Jan 2, 2012)

I am so sorry for your family's loss of Sammy. It is so incredible how dogs tug at our heart strings.


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## elly (Nov 21, 2010)

Im so very sorry. It's so so hard to lose our special friends. My Chesters sister died suddenly last week and everyone is devestated, she wasnt yet four. I understand your pain and hope the memories can help to change some of your sadness to smiles in time.


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I'm so sorry for your loss of Sammy, my thoughts are with you. 

Please feel free to share pictures of Sammy with us, we'd love to see and hear more about him. 

I think your first dog always holds a special place in your heart. 

Godspeed Sammy


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