# One Long and Agonizing Month



## Norman (Feb 10, 2011)

To my Norman,

Well a month has passed since we decided to not let you live a life of pain and fight a battle with cancer for which there was no hope of winning. I still miss you, I miss you so much. I registered for the Bark in the Park run again this year, just like all the others. Except this time I checked the box "In Memory of." That made the hurt all too real again. I try to remember you got upset when I was upset and that helps me regain my composure. Zoe made me a necklace in daycare with your tag attached to it. I plan to wear it during the run. Although I'll miss you at the finish line I know you'll be running beside me this time, ears flopping and tongue hanging out. Your brother Winslow will be waiting for me at the finish this year. I remember always seeing you weave your way through all the dogs and people to greet me at the end. We both know Winslow will get lost and lose focus along the way. Oh how I miss always tripping over you around the house. You never left my side and now that I'm alone I feel lost. I don't know how I will react when someone asks about you at the run. I know it will happen. In all the choas that occurred in the day we lost you I've been trying to remember the last time we played together before the end. I remember now. Two days before you chased me from the car all the way up the stairs because you refused to not let me get away without petting you when I got home. I find it amazing you were so sick but never seemed to let it dampen your mood or ability. If I decided on the chemo and surgery we could have had months together. But I know this is how you would want it. You never lost your digity, I fulfilled my promise to never, ever let you suffer, and that was so much harder than I could have ever imagined. Maybe I'll let you jump up on me the next time we meet. We'll forget the rules mommy forced you to follow. No more shaking the coins in the can. Promise!


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## Oaklys Dad (Dec 28, 2005)

So sorry for your loss. It is amazing how long it takes for the pain to go away. I hope you are able to get another golden soon. Not as a replacement but to help fill the void.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss - your letter is a moving tribute for your Norman, and he will be with you for this Bark in the Park - just on silent paws now.


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## CAGK71 (Oct 22, 2010)

Rob, your tribute to Norman is so loving. Storm is my first dog ever. I've wanted a Golden for the longest time when I was growing up and finally adopted Storm in November. He is 5 years old and the thought of him not being here and going through what alot of our GRF members have gone through with losing their best friends and family members, sends me in a panic.

I just hope that I will be as strong and loving as you are towards Norman when its Storm's time. You and the rest of the GRF members who have been able to make the ultimate last loving gesture with letting your Goldens go are all MY HEROs. And of course those that do RESCUE as well.

Keep strong Rob...Norman will be right beside you and egging you on at the Bark in the Park run.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

A beautiful letter to your beloved Norman. I empathize. Yesterday was six months since my Selka went to Heaven from cancer. I too miss him more than words can say. It was a teary day.


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## ggdenny (Nov 2, 2008)

This is such a wonderful tribute to Norman. Emotional healing after losing one of our doggies is so painful and so long. But, it does eventually happen. Believe me, I still think about Paul and Simon every day. Norman will always be a part of you and the pain will lessen over time.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Rob*

Rob

What a beautiful letter to Norman!

I sure he will be with you at the run!

We made the same "promise," to all of our dogs.


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## Tuckers Mom (Nov 12, 2010)

Rob,
I am deeply moved by your letter. I lost Frazier only 2 months ago ( not even). I know that raw pain in your tone. He loves you, and always will, and you can BET he will be there wagging that tongue from the bridge. May your heart feel lighter in the days to come. ( hugs)


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## magiclover (Apr 22, 2008)

I'm so sorry about your loss of Norman. Such a beautiful tribute to a much loved dog and friend. I also just lost my girl to cancer on Monday and feel so empty without her. I pray that you find some peace on the day you run at Bark in the Park, knowing he runs with you in your heart.


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## goldensmum (Oct 23, 2007)

Norman will be running alongside you, and if you feel a breeze as you run it will his tail wagging so hard by your side.


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

Rob, your letter to your boy Norman was beautiful and so touching. I feel your pain and loss. I know your loss is deep felt and I hope with time your pain will ease. 

Norman will always be with you, you may not see him, but you will feel his presence everyday. I'm sure he misses you as much as you miss him. 

It's been three weeks today since we lost our boy, he went to the bridge on 2/18/11-he was 15.5, I hope he is bringing much joy and comfort to someone in Heaven that left their best friend behind or to someone who always wanted a dog but couldn't have one while they were here on earth.

My thoughts go out to you Rob as you run in Norman's honor this weekend.
Do him proud.


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## Norman (Feb 10, 2011)

Sweetally said:


> Rob, your tribute to Norman is so loving. Storm is my first dog ever. I've wanted a Golden for the longest time when I was growing up and finally adopted Storm in November. He is 5 years old and the thought of him not being here and going through what alot of our GRF members have gone through with losing their best friends and family members, sends me in a panic.
> 
> I just hope that I will be as strong and loving as you are towards Norman when its Storm's time. You and the rest of the GRF members who have been able to make the ultimate last loving gesture with letting your Goldens go are all MY HEROs. And of course those that do RESCUE as well.
> 
> Keep strong Rob...Norman will be right beside you and egging you on at the Bark in the Park run.


Thank you. Norman was my first puppy too. Someone recently told me to reflect on how I feel and ask myself if my life would have been better or worse without him. The answers is obviously worse. Their point was that the pain I feel now could never compare to the joy Norman brought to my life. However, I do believe the pain I would feel watching him slowly die would be much, much worse - which made my decision the best choice for both me and Norman. My advice to you is to not fret about that decision, enjoy the time you have. When the time comes you'll know what to do.


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## Norman (Feb 10, 2011)

Debles said:


> A beautiful letter to your beloved Norman. I empathize. Yesterday was six months since my Selka went to Heaven from cancer. I too miss him more than words can say. It was a teary day.


Thank you. I never imagined it would be this difficult. One day we'll be united with our pups again and this period of time will be a distant memory.


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## Norman (Feb 10, 2011)

Tuckers Mom said:


> Rob,
> I am deeply moved by your letter. I lost Frazier only 2 months ago ( not even). I know that raw pain in your tone. He loves you, and always will, and you can BET he will be there wagging that tongue from the bridge. May your heart feel lighter in the days to come. ( hugs)


Just discovered the multiquote feature. Thank you. Sorry to hear about your dear Frazier. I thought I knew what sorrow was until this happened, but I had no idea. The irony is Norman was forced on me by his mom and for the first two years he and I didn't get along. The next 6 years went by in a blink and this horrible tragedy was the only thing able to seperate us. We always stood side by side through those years. I'd trade 10 years of my life for just 1 more with Norman in an instant. I'm sure you understand. 



magiclover said:


> I'm so sorry about your loss of Norman. Such a beautiful tribute to a much loved dog and friend. I also just lost my girl to cancer on Monday and feel so empty without her. I pray that you find some peace on the day you run at Bark in the Park, knowing he runs with you in your heart.


That is horrible. There's a space our friends fill within us that will always remain empty when they leave. You'll always have the memories though and that is pricelss. My friend's 4 year old daughter asked me if doggy heaven was in California - that was the first time I laughed after I lost Norman. She then told me she thought God just wanted a big dog like Norman to play with, which amazed me because she is only 4 and trying to provide me with solice. Just know you're not alone and neither are our puppies!


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## Hali's Mom (Oct 5, 2006)

Rob, what a beautiful tribute to Norman, for me it will be one month on Monday and I can surely empathize with your loss, actually I had tears running down my face as I read your tribute (not such a GOOD thing at work) 
It was a beautiful story about a beautiful dog and the love he gave his family.
Have a great run this weekend and know that Norman is proud of you.


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

I read this yesterday and just couldn't reply. It 's been over 4 months (almost 5) and the pain is still pretty strong.

Of course your life would not have been as wonderful without Norman. and yes, the pain is so strong because the love was so strong too. We "know" this, but we still grieve the loss. I too lost Copper to cancer (in October) and it was very fast. 36 hours from dx, but he was happy right up to the very, very end and ate an Arby's sandwich on the table. I wish I had told my husband to bring a sackful, but he did bring that last loving one for my boy.:smooch:

I have a BassettX and a JRT and my husband does not want me to get another dog, but I sure miss the pure love and adoration a golden gives. My other dogs are not so "into" me. they just have their own agenda, but it does help to have some doggy love. I've always gotten another rescue golden very quickly after losing one of my loves. If your heart could handle it, it might help you too.

Big hugs to you.


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## Augie's Mom (Sep 28, 2007)

What a beautiful loving tribute to Norman.

Maybe you can have a t-shirt or pin made with Norman's picture and "In Memory Of". This may let your friends know what happened so you aren't overwhelmed with questions at the event. It is so hard to convey the first time let alone having to repeat it.


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## 3 goldens (Sep 30, 2005)

I am so sorry. I knowfrom having been thru it three times that is one of the hardest decisions you will ever have to make. But you did it for your precious boy and if he coud i know he would thank you for stopping the suffering.

He is now a andsome boy at the bridge with so many other handsome golden boys and beautiful golden girls, and other beautiful and handsome dogs--i have an entire pack of goldesn, irish setters and english setters waiting for me, 55 years worth ofthem.


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