# My puppy squirms when I hold her...



## RedDogs (Jan 30, 2010)

This is fairly common, but should be addressed.

How much petting/holding can you do and have her 100% relaxed? 

Put a hand on her shoulder. Remove your hand. Feed a treat. Repeat 20+ times.Do this for several training sessions. 

If she is holding still, next, hold and pet her halfway down her back. Repeat 20+ times. If she wiggles, do a smaller pet. If she's good, after several sessions you can increase....

Find a good puppy socialization class AND a good basic training class. Your instructors will probably use a method similar to this. We are teaching your puppy that restraint is a great thing and to love being restrained. 

I've worked hard on this with my dog and we had a great vet visit last month. The vet restrained him and he held extra still, not because he was nervous but because he knew he would be reinforced for being still.


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## Judi (Feb 26, 2007)

Sounds good to me! Just don't overdue the treats. Goldens tend to gain weight easily. Is there a dog Park you might go to near you for more socialization?


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## Tanyac (Jun 18, 2008)

Merebear said:


> Is it normal for a Golden puppy to cry and try to jump out of my arms a lot whenever I hold her? I mean, she does follow me around a lot, and cry whenever I walk out of the room, but it kind of saddens me that she doesn't want to cuddle that much. Don't get me wrong... She will cuddle if she's realllly sleepy. Sometimes she'll even fall asleep on me. But I was just wondering if anyone could tell me if this is normal...and will she grow out of this phase? I have never owned a Golden before, and I know that this puppy's parents are both very pretty show dogs and very friendly. I met her mother in person, and she was very sweet, always walking up to me to be petted and wagging her tail. Will my puppy (Molly) be like that when she matures?
> 
> Thanks!!!
> ~Meredith


Hi there, I would say your puppy probably wasn't handled too much at the breeders hence her resistance to being carried about. I only say this, because with the litter we raised in our home last year, all the puppies were carried out to the car with their new owners, and all were exceptionally calm and happy to be carried. I did spend a LOT of time with the litter, and they were very well socialised. Not all breeders would have the time to do this.

I would add however that you shouldn't really need to pick your pup up very much. They are generally large puppies and if you pick them up incorrectly you could hurt them. 

For now, apart from the excellent advice given above, I would tend to interact with her on the floor. If you sit on the floor and allow the pup to come to you, things should improve. If you do need to pick her up, ensure you have one hand under the chest near front legs, and the other hand scooping up the bottom. Hold her close to your chest so she feels more secure, and never squeeze, hold too tightly, or pick up by the elbows/front legs.

It's important she becomes accustomed to being handled, but that does not necessarily mean she needs to be carried.

Good luck, and enjoy her!


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

Daisy never liked being held either and she's definitely not a cuddler. She likes to be near, likes to be petted, but she is rather aloof. That's her personality.


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## mm03gn (Sep 24, 2008)

Bailey didn't overly love to be held when she was a little puppy - when she was tired, yes...but when she was wide awake, she just had better things to do (and get into!)...once she got a bit older, she became very cuddly


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## Willow52 (Aug 14, 2009)

Why not just sit on the floor and cuddle & hold her there. As a puppy my Hank never liked to be held while I was standing or sitting in a chair but he loved floor time. He's very much a velcro-dog and loves being cuddled, just never liked his feet off the ground.


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## mdoats (Jun 7, 2007)

Rookie didn't like to be held as a pup and he had a pretty low tolerance for cuddling. During puppy kindergarten, the trainer would talk for a few minutes at the beginning of class and we were supposed to hold our dogs. Rookie was the most squirmy of all the dogs. The other puppies would sit quietly while being held and Rookie wanted OUT of my arms.

It bummed me out a bit because I thought that was what he would be like as an adult. But that definitely changed. He LOVES to cuddle now. He's happiest when he's sleeping with some part of his body touching me. Don't push it with your dog. Just make sure the interaction is always positive and she may just come around!!


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## DianaM (Feb 18, 2010)

From what I've learned, puppies are not used to or like to be restrained. Imagine if someone was suddenly holding on to you and you had no idea what they were doing. Just do a lot of handling and holding and get them used to it. Gracie was really bad with it but we lay her on her back in our lap and give her belly rubs or rub her ears and paws. She still doesn't *love* it but tolerates it. We did this more as an exercise to help get them used to be restrained for clipping nails, etc, and not so much to cuddle but I think it might be the same concept.


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## jackie_hubert (Jun 2, 2010)

4 weeks ago we got our puppy and a few days after getting him I posted the same message as you on this forum (see "Non-cuddly, aloof puppy"). 

For 3 weeks he hated being held. He would go into a full-blown panic after being on our lap for more than a few seconds (panting, squirming, crying). Last week he suddenly changed and enjoys being held. He even tries to jump onto our laps now when we're on the couch and when we're on the floor he'll crawl right onto our lap (unless he's got something better to do of course). 

Like you, we were very much saddened at having gotten a puppy that did not want to cuddle so I can understand your dismay. 

The key with our guy was that he took quite some time to bond. Then he was simply too hot to want to be held. We worked both with positive reinforcement and we keep him cool. We first put ice-packs on our laps. Now we have a kiddy pool and after he takes a dip in it, he's ready to cuddle.

I think in our case much of it stemmed from not having been held a lot when he was little.


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## Merebear (Jun 29, 2010)

Awe. Thanks for the advice, everyone. I tried feeding her today while I held her, and she was very content with lying on me. haha. I think that with Molly, her main problem is that she gets hot when I hold her... A lot of times, she's panting when she tries to get out of my arms. Also, she follows me and sits at my feet a lot of the time. 
Oh, and by the way, I don't think that it was the breeder's fault... I went there once to visit when the pups were 4 weeks old, and they were very well experienced and handled the puppies well. I think maybe the issue was that they were used to being held on the ground rather than standing up or on the couch or something. I held almost all of the puppies, and I noticed that when I was standing up, they cried a bit after being in my arms for a while, but when I was in the playpen with them, they approached me, with their tails wagging. 
I also held my puppy back then for a long time, and she was licking my face/biting my nose and relaxing on me. I guess it really depends on if she's in the mood to cuddle or to play...


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