# I miss my big baby Trixie



## aundy28570 (Jul 4, 2013)

I knew this was going to be hard but its overwhelming! We put our Trixie to sleep yesterday and I miss her beyond I can express. She had aggressive cancer and we both put up a fight til the end. I tried everything possible to make her comfortable and in hopes that this monster would go away but it didnt. I keep asking myself why such a good girl had to go thru this. It was hard all the way til the end and so many times when I thought the end was near she'd pull through. The last few days she was declining fast and the last night was terrible but it was such a tough decision to make that last vet appt. She was always afraid I would leave her whenever we went there and I didnt want to fail her. Even though she couldn't stand any longer she seemed to be doing ok til they brought in the stuff for IV's and she struggled to reach me. The vet said we could take her home and give stronger pain meds but knew this was not fair for her to go on this way. Still I question myself as to why this ever had to happen and I had to make that final choice. It was sooooo hard.
Today I miss her terribly but she is no longer struggling to breath just to take a few steps. Even though she wasnt much herself any more she followed me to every room and until she could no longer do that then she would look up at me to see where I was at. I really miss those eyes!!!!
She always had a teddy she sucked on and she loved out other 2 furbabies but she never let them have her teddies. We took her teddy with us at her final moments.
I know in time it will get better but it hurts so much now!


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I am so very sorry for your loss of Trixie.

It is extremely hard, I've been where you're at too many times and it never gets any easier.

I know you're hurting, wish there was something I could say or do to take your pain away. All I can say is that it takes time. Grieving is different for everyone, everyone deals with it differently. Be kind to yourself, let yourself go through the process and give your heart time to heal. 

The thing I always tried to remember or focus on, was that my dog(s) was no longer in pain or suffering. I believe they go to Heaven where they are whole and strong again, enjoying life like they once did when they were young. And I also believe that one day we will be reunited. 

Trixie will always be with you, she lives in your heart and in your memories. I also believe our dogs are still with us, watching over us.


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## DeannaF (Jul 24, 2013)

I have a Trixie too, so your post quickly caught my eye...I am so sorry for your loss.  I know how overwhelming the pain is, but I'm praying for comfort for you. <3


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

I am so very sorry for your loss of Trixie. I lost my Selka almost three years ago to osteosarcoma. My heart aches for you. I rarely come on GRF anymore because it is too painful.


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## valibin (Jun 28, 2013)

I am so sorry for your loss of Trixie. I understand how you feel. May time heal your heartache.


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## PrincessDi (Jun 8, 2009)

My heart aches for you. I'm very sorry that your lost your beloved girl Trixie. Time helps us to learn to be able to live with such a deep loss. Keeping you in our thoughts that in time you will remember the love and beautiful memories.


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## Willow52 (Aug 14, 2009)

So sorry for your loss. Godspeed Trixie.


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## KiwiD (Jan 14, 2008)

So sorry to hear about Trixie.


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## goldensmum (Oct 23, 2007)

So very sorry for your loss of Trixie, to have to make the final decision for them, is probably the hardest thing we ever have to do, and only people who truly love their furred ones are able to make that decision. Sadly we have made that decision 4 times and it never gets easier, and to be honest I wouldn't expect it to be.

Trixie will be running free from pain at the bridge, with many new friends

"You're giving me a special gift,
so sorrowfully endowed
And through these last few cherished days
your courage makes me proud

But really love is knowing
when your best friend is in pain
and understanding the earthly acts
will only be in vain

So looking deep into your eyes
beyond, into your soul
I see, in you the magic that will
once more make me whole

The strength that your possess
is why I look to you today
to do this thing that must be done
for it is the only way

That strength is why I followed you
and chose you as my friend
And why I've loved you all these years
my partner ' til the end

Please understand just what this gift 
you're giving, means to me
It gives me back the strength I've lost
and all my dignity.

You take a stand on my behalf
for that is what friends do
And I know that what you do is right
for I believe it too

So, one last time I breathe your scent
and through your hand I feel
the courage that's within you too
now grant me this appeal.

Cut the leash that holds me here
Dear friend and let me run, once more
a strong and steady dog
My pain and struggle done.

And don't despair my passing
for I won't be far away
Forever here within your heart
And memory I shall stay

I'll be watching over you
your ever faithful friend
And in your memories I will run
A young dog once again"

Run free and sleep softly Trixie


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## cgriffin (Nov 30, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## Doug (Jul 17, 2010)

Good luck with your healing journey. 
It is such an intense time. Knowing that they are only borrowed from heaven is supposed to make it easier but the loss of their unconditional love is just heart breaking. 
Excellent poem Golden's Mum! Take comfort in the fact that you did the right thing. Trixie is free of restrictions and pain and she wants you to be happy for her.
Take care, be good to yourself as the firsts are the hardest.


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## aundy28570 (Jul 4, 2013)

Thanks for all the supportvie comments. Meant alot to me especially during such a hard time. Such a emotional rollercoaster that only time can heal. She never met anybody she didn't like and would cry any time showed attention which was alot. Alot about her I miss!!! Waiting for her to be cremated so wherever I go(we rent the lot) will never have to leave her.


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## Mjpar72 (Jun 4, 2013)

I am so sorry for your tremendous loss. You did the right thing and you did it because you LOVE her. Though she does nt walk beside you, she will always walk with you....in your heart.


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## Buddy's mom forever (Jun 23, 2011)

I am very sorry for your loss of Trixie, I know how hard it is. Lost my Buddy 2 years ago, still have tears every time I say his name. Hugs.


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## aundy28570 (Jul 4, 2013)

Last week this time was my last night with her and even though I knew what was coming hoped it wasn't the last. Hard to believe a week tommorrow. So many memories and trying to remember the good ones but those last few days and last moment keeps sneeking in my head.
Got a sympathy card today from her vet with special messages and signed by all. When I opened it up there was her paw print they had made for me when after they took her in the back right after being pts. Something I will have forever but really tore me up when I saw that foot print and even though I was sitting in my car waiting on her she always wanted me close. 
Been so many spots that I look for her and she's not there. She was never far from inside. Now I just want her home, if I cant have her the way she use to be then I'm ready for her remainders to come home and then I can say she is home with me!
Nights are the worse so time to get ready for bed a face a new day tommorrow with my 2 furbabbies that need there mama. Goodnight!


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## Brinkleythegolden (Jun 18, 2012)

I am so sorry-I remember those first days well. Allow yourself the time to grieve. I know it's hard to believe, but the pain does lessen over time. Take care..


Sent from Petguide.com Free App


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## Buddy's mom forever (Jun 23, 2011)

I am very, very sorry. When I lost Buddy I did not go anywhere else but work for very long time. I remember one day driving back home I stopped to hug one of my Bud's friends and talked to his mom, crying all the time. She said you will feel better the day you get over of the memories of his last days, than you will remember just good days you had. Took me months and months to get to that point, it is not an advice you can follow easly, how to control your thoughts it require way more than just stop remembering them, harder you try, faster they come back.
Please just try to remember you loved your baby with whole your heart with no regrets or holding back. As hard as it is, and I know how hard it could be some days, that thought that I loved the most I could and I wouldn't have it any other way help me get up in the morning and survive the day.
Wish I could help more, hugs.


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## aundy28570 (Jul 4, 2013)

*Trixie Came Home Today*

My Trixie girl came home today. Tommorrow, Thurs. will be 2 weeks. Each day is a little better and I have to keep myself going for my other 2 furbabies but I still miss her sooooo much. Hard to believe this is all I have left of her but atleast she will forever be with me. Just wish it was easier!


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## valibin (Jun 28, 2013)

I am so sorry for your loss of Trixie. I understand your pain.


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## HolDaisy (Jan 10, 2012)

I am so very sorry for your loss of Trixie, she was a beautiful girl. I lost Daisy 19months ago and the first few months are very difficult indeed. It hurts bad for a long time, but time really does help to ease the pain and help you focus on the happier memories. Take care.


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## Carolyn Finn (Jul 23, 2013)

I am so sorry for your loss. We are going through the same thing - our boy left us on July 20th. Some days are harder than others but now I can think of his goofy ways and finally smile. May Kolby and Trixie be running and playing together at the bridge.


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## Ylan's Mom (May 14, 2013)

I am sorry about your Trixie. My furry angel, Ylan, left on May 6. It was a monster cancer as well and we made the decision of letting her go. She was my half for 13.5 years. I understand your pain. It is so raw it is hard to figure out life itself. Take your time, mourn, honor and one day celebrate her life...it does get a bit easier even though one never stops missing them.


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