# Amber is close to the Rainbow Bridge



## AndyLL (Nov 18, 2009)

My 12 year old Golden Retriever, Amber, has bone cancer in her leg. No real treatment except for amputation or chemo which would only extend her life for a short time. Of course I will not put her through that.

Amber has been an exceptional dog. I've owned 6 dogs as an adult. My parents and siblings have owned countless dogs. I've never met a dog as talented as Amber. With zero training she has always heeled to me with no leash required and had the ability to learn any command I taught her immediately. She could have excelled in the ring or as a therapy dog if I would have understand the possibilities when she was younger.

We lucked into owning Amber. The 1st dog my wife and I owned as a couple, AspenLeaf, died of cancer at a young age we were devastated. My long time vet just happened to have another client who had private breeding. The pups were all going to family members but they happened to have 1 extra. For a token payment I got a best friend.

Amber's father is from the same bloodline as Gerald Ford's dog, Liberty. I never traced it farther than that because lets face it... once you get to a bitch whos puppies are good enough for a President you know a descendant of that bitch is good enough for yourself.

I have lost 3 Golden's to cancer before Amber. She will affect me the most. Although she is the same age as my son and they grew up together she is my dog... and my best friend.

The diagnoses, as hard as it was to hear, is almost a relief. For the last 6 months she has had severe arthritis in her rear hips and has had so much muscle atrophy and joint deterioration that every once in a while when she has a fall I have to carry/support her for a day or so. 

I have been worried for a while that I wouldn't have the guts/ability to recognize when her inability to be fully mobile was resulting in a poorer quality of life. She is such a happy dog that I'm sure I'd only see the good moments and ignore the bad moments.

The cancer will take that decision out of my hands. She has weeks... maybe a month or so to go. We are going on a cruise in 3 weeks. My wife, bless her heart, offered to cancel it. I declined. 

If she deteriorates over the next week or so I will make the hardest decision I've ever made and send her to the River before we leave. If she stays about the same and we can mange her pain then Amber and I will spend month or so doing the things we love to do together before I say goodbye.

Tomorrow morning... no matter how bad she limps... or how bad her pain is... she'll be up and hopping around waiting for her morning treat and expecting to go on her morning walk with the other dogs. 

While I'll try to limit her activity... I'll allow her to come. The day I decide she can't come is the day I decide it's time to let her go....


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## Wagners Mom2 (Mar 20, 2012)

My heart aches for you because I, too, am going through your same pain. Abby is blessed to have you all...and you'll be in my thoughts and prayers. Hugs.


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## elly (Nov 21, 2010)

I am so very sorry. I know your heartache and heartbreak and your post is so beautifully written, your love for your sweet girl is clearly immense. I will hold you all in my care and thoughts.


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I'm so sorry, my thoughts are with you as your facing this decision, it's one of the hardest I've ever had to make. I've been through it several times and it has never got any easier as each dog held a special place in my heart.

Amber is beautiful, she's a very special and truly wonderful girl. Your love for her is reflected in your words.

Enjoy the time you have with her.


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## Barkr (Dec 23, 2011)

Bless her golden heart and yours too. Peace be with you .


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

I am sorry to read about Amber's diagnosis. Thoughts and prayers to you and your family as you go through this journey with Amber.


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## Yaichi's Mom (Jul 21, 2012)

My heart breaks with yours as I read your post about your precious Amber. May the love you both share guide you through these difficult times many of us know so well. You, your family and sweet Amber are in my thoughts and prayers.


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## wjane (Oct 12, 2013)

so sorry to hear this. I am sure you will make every minute that you have left with her, count. I will always treasure the last month I had with my girl, knowing that she had a tumor that was slowly bleeding out and would eventually take her. I remember every little thing about her more than any of my other dogs. I wish you and your girl special days ahead.


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## Martin (Feb 21, 2011)

I'm sorry... Amber sounds like a wonderful dog. You were lucky to have each other.


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## amy22 (May 11, 2008)

I'm so very sorry. Amber sounds like such a wonderful dog. It's heartbreaking, they do not live long enough.


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## sophieanne (Feb 4, 2014)

I needed a good cry. Amber sounds wonderful (like all goldens). I know you are doing what is right, I've been there and I totally undertand and feel for you. Enjoy the time you have left together.


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## AndyLL (Nov 18, 2009)

Thanks everyone.

At times she seems so normal but when I pay attention and take off my rose colored glasses I realize she's uncomfortable most of the time and without the meds she'd been in a lot of pain.

I'm meeting with the Vet tomorrow. Originally it was to talk about her diagnosis ( I wasn't there when she was x-rayed ) and ask about what to expect.

In reality it looks like I'll be scheduling the time to say goodbye.

What's funny is all my other goldens started getting grey muzzles at 5/6 and Amber looks like she's in the prime of her life. ( the picture in the OP is when she was 11 )


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## mygoldengirl (Jan 10, 2014)

Enjoy everyday with her. The decision is one that I had to make last year around this time and it still makes me feel bad. I wish the best for you and Amber


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