# My heart dog, Gypsy



## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

I do a lot of reading on these forums, but I'm not an active poster. Last Thursday night, I lost my 13 year old heart golden, Gypsy, to cancer. We are devastated. She's been my best friend since I was 13, and I'm now 26. I knew you all would understand what I'm going through. This has all been so hard. Coming home to an empty home, watching my toddler constantly point to her kennel with a confused expression, seeing her food and water bowl which I haven't been able to bring myself to empty yet... It feels like this pain will never fade. My heart hurts so deeply. 

Do any of you know of any good support groups or where I might be able to find one? When I try to express my feelings to the people in my life, I get answers like "it's always hard to lose a pet" or "everything happens for a reason". She wasn't just a pet to my husband and I. People don't understand.

I attached a picture of her from this past Christmas.


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

I'm so sorry you have lost your Gypsy. I have a soft spot for the old gold, with their sugar faces and I understand how difficult it is to be without them.
I wish I could help you find some help if you need it, but I don't even know where you live and that makes a huge difference. Here in Australia, for instance, I know that Lifeline volunteers are now trained to help those who have lost their pets. There are also psychologists who specialise in this sort of bereavement counselling in the big cities.
And, of course, you can always tell us about your girl. Most of us have lost special heart dogs and understand what you are going through.


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## iGirl (Oct 5, 2009)

So sorry to hear she passed, but please take heart that she's no longer suffering. So many of us know exactly what you're feeling - consider us your support group! These wonderful dogs are part of our family - it's like losing a child.... our baby! We just lost our 13+ year old Phoebe and it's very hard - I put away everything but her bed so far, because that would leave just too much of an emptiness in our house. I can still "see" her right there next to me all day, following me around everywhere, and coming in to say goodnight and lay by our bed. I was crying yesterday in the grocery store when I got the the yogurt section - oh, how she loved to get the last bit in the bowl!  People must have thought I was nuts. Only time will heal the heartbreak - but it will fade in time. If you have the ability maybe there will be room in your heart for another golden friend some day. We're already starting our search...


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Gypsy*

I am SO SORRY about your sweet girl, Gypsy.
My Smooch and Snobear will take care of her.
I added her to the Rainbow Bridge List:
http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com...rly-list/441177-2017-rainbow-bridge-list.html

I googled Dog Loss Support Groups and came up with this:


Pet Loss Support Group | Facebook

https://www.facebook.com/Petloss/ - 616k - Cached - Similar pages

Pet Loss Support Group. 9442 likes · 242 talking about this. Supporting people through the loss of a beloved companion.


Pet Bereavement Support Groups - Association for Pet Loss and ...

http://www.aplb.org/support/support_groups/ - 9k - Cached - Similar pages

The APLB is pleased to note that support groups are springing up all across the country. We ask all our friends to help us regularly update and expand this roster ...


Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement

http://www.aplb.org/ - 35k - Cached - Similar pages

The Association for Pet Loss and Bereavement, Inc. (APLB) is the only Internet ... We need your support to help us expand the many services we are providing.


Pet Loss Grief Support Community Resources at Rainbow Bridge

https://rainbowsbridge.com/Grief_Support_Center/Grief_Support_Home.htm - 27k - Cached - Similar pages

Resources for emotional healing from the death of beloved pet. Visit the Petloss chat and forum. Read inspirational thoughts on coping with your loss.


Ten Tips on Coping with Pet Loss

http://www.pet-loss.net/ - 44k - Cached - Similar pages

Coping with grief on the death of a pet; tips on pet loss bereavement. ... veterinarian or humane association to recommend a pet loss counselor or support group.


Lightning Strike Pet Loss Support | Death of Pet, Sick Pet, Pet Loss ...

http://www.lightning-strike.com/ - 19k - Cached - Similar pages

One of the oldest pet loss support websites on the Internet, online since 1996. Provides help for pet lovers with a pet loss message board, pet loss book store, ...


Pet loss support group | Animal Humane Society

https://www.animalhumanesociety.org/services/pet-loss-support-group - 246k - Cached - Similar pages

Pet Loss Support Group Pets give us companionship and unconditional love. Our relationships with them are very special. For many of us, our companion ...


Petloss.com - Pet Loss Support Groups

http://www.petloss.com/groups.htm - 168k - Cached - Similar pages

Pet Loss Support Group Meetings (Updated 02/07/17). Please email me if you have an addition or correction to this list or problems with one of the groups: Click ...


Pet Loss Support Group | Humane Society

http://www.thehumanesociety.org/services/pet-loss-support-group/ - 44k - Cached - Similar pages

Facilitated by trained volunteers, The Humane Society for Tacoma & Pierce County's Pet Loss Support Group provides a safe, supportive environment where ...


Pet Loss Support Group - Animal Medical Center - New York City

http://www.amcny.org/petlosssupportgroup - 76k - Cached - Similar pages

The death of a pet can cause sadness, anger and guilt. The AMC's Pet Loss Support Group is a comforting place to share experiences and feelings in a ...



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## swishywagga (Nov 13, 2012)

I am so very sorry for the loss of Gypsy, I lost my boy in September 2015 and was absolutely devastated. It will get easier I promise, it's just different and for you right now it's so very raw. So many of us here have gone through the loss of a precious dog and have experienced all the emotions and feelings and in particular the one that you'll never be able to smile again. 
Being part of this forum helped me immensely because I could express my feelings without being judged and knew that others had been through exactly the same journey. Allow yourself to grieve, it's different for us all and time does help. 
Once again I'm so very sorry for your loss and I will keep you and your family in my thoughts and prayers.


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## dlmrun2002 (Mar 4, 2011)

Please accept my deepest sympathy for the loss of Gypsy. What an awesome looking Golden in front of that Christmas tree. Have faith knowing you gave Gypsy a fantastic life and that is why he loved you so. This forum can help talking about your loss. We have all been there, some of us many times. I hope you feel better soon.
Godpseed to Gypsy.

dlm ny country


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## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

Thank you all so much for your kind words. Your comments were so encouraging to read. We will probably be ready to welcome another golden into our family sometime this fall/winter, and we've already started our search as well. We didn't realize how hard it would be to live without a golden. I asked my vet's office about local support groups, but they weren't aware of any.

Thank you so much Karen519 for all of the resources you listed! I appreciate it so much. I would've replied to your private message, but because I have so few posts, I wasn't able to. 

I'm so sorry to hear about your goldens, iGirl and swishywagga. I'm sure our goldens are all having a great time together doing all of the things they love. Again, thank you for your responses. You've all been very supportive, and that's what I've needed. 

Hannah


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## nolefan (Nov 6, 2009)

Golden_Gypsy said:


> Thank you all so much for your kind words. Your comments were so encouraging to read. We will probably be ready to welcome another golden into our family sometime this fall/winter, and we've already started our search as well. We didn't realize how hard it would be to live without a golden. ...


Hannah, my heart goes out to you on the loss of your Gypsy. Of course your home is empty without your Golden. I've always found when I lose a dog that not only do I miss the individual dog that has just passed away but I'm miserable without the presence of a canine companion. Does that make sense? Being a one dog home makes the death of a pet that much tougher. It's so empty without the chin resting on your knee, the thump of a tail on the floor in the morning, the many small things about having a dog. I'm guessing that you will start noticing crumbs on the floor too without Gypsy to assist with cleanup since you have a toddler. (I always wondered how people with small children could possibly exist without a dog.) 

I'm so glad to hear that although you're grieving, you're putting thought into the process of bringing your next Golden home. Getting the ball rolling months in advance is going to make the process easier in the long run. I hope you will use this forum as a resource in helping you understand clearances and what makes a reputable breeder (unless you're thinking of rescuing which is a wonderful avenue). Good breeders have waiting lists before their puppies are born so it's definitely not too soon to be working on finding a breeder now. 

I hope you'll post more photos of Gypsy and share stories about her if you feel like it, sometimes it helps a lot with the grieving process to be able to do that with other Golden people. My heart goes out to you on your loss. Gypsy looks like an absolute sweetheart.


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## Ivyacres (Jun 3, 2011)

So sorry to read about your loss of Gypsy.


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## brianne (Feb 18, 2012)

My sympathy on the loss of your Gypsy. She was lovely. I agree with the other posters - come here anytime to talk about Gypsy and tell us about her. I think nearly everyone on this forum has lost a heart dog and can empathize with how you are feeling.

I lost my heart dog, Nikki over 18 years ago and at times I STILL find myself in tears on anniversaries. It gets easier but it doesn't completely go away because of the love in your heart for them. The feeling I can still remember was being completely lost and barely able to function for a couple of weeks and also the disbelief that she was gone.

Grief is different for all of us. Give yourself time and be kind to yourself. I, too, am glad to hear that you have begun your search for a puppy. Think of it as honoring your beloved Gypsy. She showed you how wonderful it is to love a dog and now you are honoring her by sharing your love with another.

{hugs}


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## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

nolefan said:


> I'm so glad to hear that although you're grieving, you're putting thought into the process of bringing your next Golden home. Getting the ball rolling months in advance is going to make the process easier in the long run. I hope you will use this forum as a resource in helping you understand clearances and what makes a reputable breeder (unless you're thinking of rescuing which is a wonderful avenue). Good breeders have waiting lists before their puppies are born so it's definitely not too soon to be working on finding a breeder now.


We will definitely be doing it the right way. When my family purchased Gypsy 13 years ago, the proper research was not done, and she was purchased from a backyard breeder. My husband and I are completely dedicated to finding a reputable breeder who loves the breed and wants to better it. GRF has taught me so much as far as what to look for in a reputable breeder. 

Seeing crumbs on the floor is one of the things that I'm having a hard time with. It's a painful reminder that she's missing. Gypsy loved my toddler's mealtimes because she knew she'd get yummy snacks. I miss her so much. My toddler is missing her, too. He's been acting out a lot the past day or so, and I can't help but wonder if it's related to her not being here. 

The attached picture is of Gypsy and my toddler from Christmas 2015.


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## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

I figured I would post what I posted on my Facebook page the night she passed. 

"
Tim and I had to say goodbye to our sweet golden, Gypsy, tonight. I have been trying to come up with the perfect words to give her the tribute she deserves, but no amount of words will do. 
She was 13. She's been my best friend since I was 13, myself. She was that one, 4-legged person I always knew I could count on when it seemed like there was no one else around. She was a gift from God to a broken 13 year old. She and I grew up together. She's so much more to me than "just a dog". 



She welcomed our toddler with grace even when he would continually push her buttons which was typically a daily occurrence. Gypsy was one of Elijah's 1st words if not his very first word. He loved her so dearly, and she loved him. I'm so thankful he got to experience her love even if for only a short while. 



I take comfort knowing that my golden girl is finally free of the cancer that riddled her body. She can finally cross the rainbow bridge, although I'm sure this water dog will likely skip the bridge and swim her way on over. I know whoever greets her on the other side will be blessed by her. To know her is to know unconditional love. We will miss you so very much."

Here's a picture of her in Lake Michigan. We live pretty close to the lake, so swimming trips were a pretty frequent thing for her. She LOVED it.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Gypsy*

You could give Gypsy no finer tribute than calling her your best friend. My Smooch was mine, too!!
LOVE the picture in Lake Michigan. We used to live in Woodridge, Illinois, but have moved to Loudon, TN.
Where do you live?


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## nolefan (Nov 6, 2009)

Ah Hannah, your photo of Gypsy with your son is making my eyes burn. Gypsy sure was a lucky girl. Out of all the games and roles in life that Goldens excel at, being a beloved family member has to be tops. Thank you for sharing your beautifully written tribute post, you're a wonderful writer and she was clearly adored. Hugs to you.

Keep us posted on your puppy search, that always helps me deal with grief, having that project to focus on. You're in such a wonderful region for good Golden breeders, it will be fun to see where you go. 

Thinking of you.


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## Kalhayd (May 4, 2016)

Your photos are precious and your pain is so real and raw. I am so very sorry for your loss. We lost our heart dog, Bayleigh, last August. It's been 6-months and while I didn't believe it could be manageable then, I realize now it is. There isn't a day that goes by that I don't miss that girl- she was my furry soul mate. I am sure your son is acting out. He is at an age where he cannot not verbalize his pain and he knows something is amiss. 


My children were devastated when Bayleigh died. Even now, 6-months later, something will happen and cause them to break down. My now 6-year old still sleeps with his "Bay Bay photo book". She was always present in their lives and it is an adjustment for everyone. 


Sending love and prayers for peace. 


Lisa


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## Mel (Sep 9, 2008)

What a wonderful photo of Gypsy and your son. Your pain of losing Gypsy is very raw now but believe me it will ease. You will never forget but it does become easier every day. I can honestly say that having this forum got me through. Hugs!


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## Wolfeye (Sep 15, 2015)

Gypsy is such a wonderful name. I've always loved the song by Fleetwood Mac.

I don't really have any words of comfort. I lost my golden best friend last year and up until that time I only knew that goldens were special dogs.

But not how special.

The pain, the anguish we feel when they die is one of the most beautiful things on Earth. Humans don't let loose unabashed tears for trivial reasons. Every tear that falls, every time you tear up after seeing the empty kennel, is a testament to a special bond and a special love. That's a glorious thing. 

Grief takes time and that's all there is to it. Remember the happy times, but also this, this time right now, has its own beauty. Gods truth, it sucks, and it hurts and you feel so alone, because a big part of you has left the living world. But the love you felt never dies. It never fades, never goes away. 

If there's an afterlife we can only hope to once again see that wagging tail.

Wishing you peace, when the grieving is past.


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## WVWanderer (Feb 28, 2017)

So sorry for your loss. Likewise, my 14 year old Maggie passed 3 weeks ago. I've done nothing by mope around since. I'm still struggling not being stared at during dinner.  I focus on the great joys I had with her and how much she blessed my life. May you find your comfort.


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## alphadude (Jan 15, 2010)

Sincerely sorry to hear about the loss of your Gyspy. You will find a lot of kind support from great people on this forum who have almost all experienced similar grief over the loss of a cherished golden(s). I lost my best friend to hemangio on Labor Day. Cancer SUCKS!!!!


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## Bob-N-Tash (Feb 24, 2008)

Hanna -- I too am sorry to hear about the loss of your Gypsy. Have you realized yet that by coming to this site you have already found your way to the best support group? Many of us have walked this same path. 


I get where you are coming from.... in the weeks that followed the loss of our golden, Opus, every morning we still expected to see her chin resing on the edge of the mattress waiting for an invitation to climb into bed. For nearly 15 years Opus brought in the morning paper and now seeing it at the end of the driveway each morning reminded us of her. Out of habit, we almost put breakfast dishes on the floor an dour hearts would break once again as dirty plates went into the dishwasher and leftovers were scraped into the disposal. Driving, Jeff checked the rear view mirror, but she wasn't sitting in the back seat where she belonged. We returned to an empty house. No wagging tail to say 'welcome home.' Watching TV, he unconsciously lowers his hand over the side of the chair searching for that wet nose to nudge his hand and he misses hearing the moans and groans of pleasure that Opus made as he would scratch her head and ears for hours. 


It took three years and two dogs to fill Opus' paw prints. But those new dogs did a good job of bringing laughter back into our home... and sticks and dirt and plenty of dog hair. But at night, when the lights went off we still missed that last deep contented sigh of the day that would soon turn into a soft steady dog snore as Opus drifted off to sleep.


And now, it's ten years later. Opus was a part of our life so she will always be a part of our memories. A few weeks after she was gone we went on a cruise to forget our sorrows. As the ship pulled out of the harbor, Jeff was looking for something in his jacket pocket and instead discovered a forgotten dog cookie. It stops us in our tracks.. and then we smile through our tears and agree that Opus would have enjoyed the Bermuda beaches and tossed the cookie into the ocean for the fish.


Which brings me back to Gypsy... share her stories and celebrate her life... and remember all the joy that she brought into your life.


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

Hannah, Thank you for sharing these beautiful pictures of your Gypsy. I love the photo with your son and your tribute. I'm so sorry for your loss, ... she was loved very very much.

I know what you mean about picking up her food and water bowl. I left my Merry's bowls out for over two months... every time I started to pick them up I started to cry so I just decided I would leave them there until I was ready. Be easy with yourself... there is no timeline. Hugs.


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## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

Karen519 said:


> You could give Gypsy no finer tribute than calling her your best friend. My Smooch was mine, too!!
> LOVE the picture in Lake Michigan. We used to live in Woodridge, Illinois, but have moved to Loudon, TN.
> Where do you live?


Thank you! We live in South Bend, In which is about 45 min. (give or take) from the lake.


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## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

Thank you so much to all of you! You've all been so supportive, and I feel like I've found such a good resource and support group in this forum. I'm sorry that you've all had to experience the same loss that I have, but I'm starting to see the beauty in all of the painful memories. The tears are still happening every day, but it is getting a little easier.

One of the breeders I'm currently in communication with will be breeding in either April or May, so that could mean we could possibly get a puppy in either August or September if all worked out and if she likes our family for one of her pups. It's exciting to think about.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Gypsy*



Golden_Gypsy said:


> Thank you so much to all of you! You've all been so supportive, and I feel like I've found such a good resource and support group in this forum. I'm sorry that you've all had to experience the same loss that I have, but I'm starting to see the beauty in all of the painful memories. The tears are still happening every day, but it is getting a little easier.
> 
> One of the breeders I'm currently in communication with will be breeding in either April or May, so that could mean we could possibly get a puppy in either August or September if all worked out and if she likes our family for one of her pups. It's exciting to think about.


I am so happy for you. Gypsy will be smiling!


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## nolefan (Nov 6, 2009)

Golden_Gypsy said:


> ... I'm sorry that you've all had to experience the same loss that I have, but I'm starting to see the beauty in all of the painful memories. The tears are still happening every day, but it is getting a little easier....


With any heartache in life, even the huge ones, there is always a silver lining, some good thing that can be found if your eyes are open to it. I think most people find greater depths of compassion for others when they've suffered a great loss themselves. It can also open your eyes to how very lucky we are to have known that kind of love and connection, makes you see what a gift it is to love and be loved. There are some of the kindest hearted people on this forum, I'm glad you've felt welcomed here.

It makes me very happy to hear that you are on a wait list, I hope it works out well and you will be here sharing happy news here before you know it.


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## Golden_Gypsy (Dec 3, 2016)

nolefan said:


> With any heartache in life, even the huge ones, there is always a silver lining, some good thing that can be found if your eyes are open to it. I think most people find greater depths of compassion for others when they've suffered a great loss themselves. It can also open your eyes to how very lucky we are to have known that kind of love and connection, makes you see what a gift it is to love and be loved. There are some of the kindest hearted people on this forum, I'm glad you've felt welcomed here.
> 
> It makes me very happy to hear that you are on a wait list, I hope it works out well and you will be here sharing happy news here before you know it.


Thank you so much for all of your kindness!

We are not on a wait list quite yet. Hopefully, after meeting with the breeder, and after she gets to meet my little family, I'll be able to say that we're on her wait list. Fingers crossed


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

I know where South Bend is. Happy you will be getting a dog.


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## iGirl (Oct 5, 2009)

I think you're on the healing path - looking with hope to the future and treasuring the wonderful years of love and joy you had together at the same time. I'm sure whatever you do it will work out for the best. Keep an eye out for rescues too - you just never know when something good may come along and happen when you least expect it!

U‘ᴥ’U


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Just seeing your post. I am so sorry for your loss of Gypsy. She will live in your heart forever!!! Love the pictures you posted. The one of your son and Gypsy is my favorite!!!


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