# "I'M the boss" - how to teach this?



## JDandBigAm (Aug 25, 2008)

Get involved with a good obedience class. It has done wonders with all my dogs and me. Obedience gives you and your dog a very special bond. Believe me your puppy will be relieved once she realizes she won't need to be the boss.


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## AshleyR (Sep 4, 2008)

Happy said:


> Get involved with a good obedience class. It has done wonders with all my dogs and me. Obedience gives you and your dog a very special bond. Believe me your puppy will be relieved once she realizes she won't need to be the boss.


Unfortunately we live in a very tiny remote town and there are no obedience classes offered here.  The closest city that has one is 5 hours away.


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## spruce (Mar 13, 2008)

I've had Bridger truly listen to me twice - once when he stole pizza, once when he growled at Obi (old gold). My voice was firm & the fact that I meant "no" came across - he obeyed me all nite. Wish I could replicate that voice anytime. The dogs obey my husband everytime.

Guess I'm saying give commands in strong voice, don't be a whimp like me & "plead" with them.

But, hey, we just graduated Obedience II tonite --- I learned alot. 

Bet there are some good classes on DVD or books.


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## kgiff (Jul 21, 2008)

Check out the nothing in life is free training method. 

If you can't do obedience classes is there anyone close to you that has experience training dogs? It may be worthwhile trying to find someone you can buddy up with for some training. 

I'm a firm believer that putting in a lot of hard work at the beginning is rewarding in the long run. I know it seems like a lot of work now, but it'll be worth putting the time in now. Good Luck.


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## Oaklys Dad (Dec 28, 2005)

Since food is a biggie in a dogs world try having your pup sit and wait once you set the food bowl on the floor until you give the release. Hand feeding is another good way to teach your pup where the food comes from.

Another trick is to ration out all of your pups food and making him work for every last bite of kibble throughout the day. Fill up a pouch with a days worth of food and make sure you get a sit, down, stay for every last bit of kibble.


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## Emma&Tilly (May 15, 2005)

Hi there, I really do feel at your puppys tender age (or any age to be honest) creating a dog that is well behaved is not about showing the puppy 'I'M boss'...as much as people don't like to believe this but dogs do not spend their days under the table plotting at ways in which to take over the family. Infact the whole theory of 'pecking order' that your breeder put forward, I strongly believe only exisits between dogs (and loosly at that). Dogs have no underlying plans towards household domination and are perfectly aware of the fact that they are a different species to the bi-ped inhabitants. Unlike humans who reason, cajole and hoodwink, most animals fall into the category of "prey" or predator" - as in they may well try to _dominate_ another of their own species but not that of a different one. I don't think it helps the situation at all to have the vision of your wee puppy is possibly trying to move up the household pecking order with an attempt to be the boss of the house. We are their primary source of food, water, shelter and comfort - they do things to _please_ us, not to outwit, overpower or control us. Your breeders theory is flawed and very much outdated way of looking at things.

Dogs do what works. It really is as simple as that. They are quick to realise what gets them what they want and what gets them absolutely no where. You are boss in the fact that you are in total control of resources so you are able to show your puppy WHAT works, and that really is the most affective way of getting your puppy to live in harmony with the family. Manage the environment so that she doesn't get into mischief as much as possible, so for example if she stealing shoes or remotes and chewing things you don't want her to then make sure everything is put away.

I would be rewarding the behaviours you want as much as possible, which means they will happen more often and ignoring and manageing the unwanted behaviours where ever possible. Direct behaviours you don't want on to something more appropriate, for example if she's being mouthy or nippy, pre-empt it and have a toy that you can direct her onto.

Spend a few minutes several times a day doing short training session which will exercise her brain and tire her out. Clicker traing is a fab way of teaching any dog but pups are just sponges with it and lap it up and it's a great way of developing a strong bond as well as training her in all the behaviours you need. It would be worth finding a really good reward based training or clicker class if it is at all possible.

Make sure she has pleny of things to chew, as pups have a real need to chew at this age and this can alleveiate some of the puppy mouthing and nipping. Give her kongs stuffed with food, introduce him to treat balls. Teach her find it games, again great fun and tiring. 

From your post there doesn't seem to be one specific issue that you need help with, more a general 'not listening' To get your puppy to listen (and you really need to remeber she will have a short attention span at this age) there really does need to be something in it for her. She need to understand what you want from her and then realise that she gets something for doing it right. 

You are definitely on the right track by avoiding physical ways of gettig 'power over her'. I find it shocking that some people go down that road and you would only end up with a very confused puppy and a damaged relationship, so thats great that you recognise that. Just keep positive and keep ignoring the bad and praising the good, it really does work! I found if my naughty puppy Harry ever got just too hyped up, just gently taking him out of the room for a few seconds did the trick. He knew then that bouncing off the furniture like a lunatic only got him excluded and robbed him of the attention and fun he was after. Simple things like that really do work. Good luck with your puppy, you'll look back at this puppy time in a year or so and wonder where it went, when you have a wonderfully behaved adult golden next to you!!

(blimey, sorry that was so long!)


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## Ljilly28 (Jan 22, 2008)

Emma's post to you is a true gift! She is absolutely right, especially about the unhelpful dynamic set up when humans adopt the notion that goldens are trying to mastermind household domination. Listen to Emma&Tilly, and all will be well.



Emma&Tilly said:


> Hi there, I really do feel at your puppys tender age (or any age to be honest) creating a dog that is well behaved is not about showing the puppy 'I'M boss'...as much as people don't like to believe this but dogs do not spend their days under the table plotting at ways in which to take over the family. Infact the whole theory of 'pecking order' that your breeder put forward, I strongly believe only exisits between dogs (and loosly at that). Dogs have no underlying plans towards household domination and are perfectly aware of the fact that they are a different species to the bi-ped inhabitants. Unlike humans who reason, cajole and hoodwink, most animals fall into the category of "prey" or predator" - as in they may well try to _dominate_ another of their own species but not that of a different one. I don't think it helps the situation at all to have the vision of your wee puppy is possibly trying to move up the household pecking order with an attempt to be the boss of the house. We are their primary source of food, water, shelter and comfort - they do things to _please_ us, not to outwit, overpower or control us. Your breeders theory is flawed and very much outdated way of looking at things.
> 
> Dogs do what works. It really is as simple as that. They are quick to realise what gets them what they want and what gets them absolutely no where. You are boss in the fact that you are in total control of resources so you are able to show your puppy WHAT works, and that really is the most affective way of getting your puppy to live in harmony with the family. Manage the environment so that she doesn't get into mischief as much as possible, so for example if she stealing shoes or remotes and chewing things you don't want him to then make sure everything is put away.
> 
> ...


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## jnmarr (Mar 7, 2008)

You have gotten super advise so far! We don't let ours on our furniture until they are 10 months or so.. and even from then on it is invitation only. I just finished a book by Jan Fennel and highly recomend it. A few other things you could do.. " ritual eating ".. ( alphas eat first ) prepare the food.. you eat a cracker slowly, then have then sit and wait.. you give the food and release. ALso have them wait for a release to go through a door.. and you always go through the door first.. Don't let them drag you down the road while they are on leash. Just stop until the leash is slack to begin with. Don't start something now that you wouldn't want an 80 pound dog to do later. We love and bond, are always kind, but somtimes have to be firm. These are habits for a liftime you are forming. Be positive and upbeat . Praise proper behavior. When I look at Penny now and she is chewing her nylabone, she will start wagging her tail even before I say anything.. she knows she is a " good girl " !!


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## FlyingQuizini (Oct 24, 2006)

Emma&Tilly said:


> Hi there, I really do feel at your puppys tender age (or any age to be honest) creating a dog that is well behaved is not about showing the puppy 'I'M boss'...as much as people don't like to believe this but dogs do not spend their days under the table plotting at ways in which to take over the family. Infact the whole theory of 'pecking order' that your breeder put forward, I strongly believe only exisits between dogs (and loosly at that). Dogs have no underlying plans towards household domination and are perfectly aware of the fact that they are a different species to the bi-ped inhabitants. Unlike humans who reason, cajole and hoodwink, most animals fall into the category of "prey" or predator" - as in they may well try to _dominate_ another of their own species but not that of a different one. I don't think it helps the situation at all to have the vision of your wee puppy is possibly trying to move up the household pecking order with an attempt to be the boss of the house. We are their primary source of food, water, shelter and comfort - they do things to _please_ us, not to outwit, overpower or control us. Your breeders theory is flawed and very much outdated way of looking at things.
> 
> Dogs do what works. It really is as simple as that. They are quick to realise what gets them what they want and what gets them absolutely no where. You are boss in the fact that you are in total control of resources so you are able to show your puppy WHAT works, and that really is the most affective way of getting your puppy to live in harmony with the family. Manage the environment so that she doesn't get into mischief as much as possible, so for example if she stealing shoes or remotes and chewing things you don't want her to then make sure everything is put away.
> 
> ...


Brilliant advice!


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