# Selka: whether or not to amputate



## Jackson'sMom (Oct 13, 2007)

What a horrible, awful decision you are facing. If you can get a consult with an oncologist right away, I personally would not make a decision until then. Maybe it's just the way I think, but I always like to gather as much information and do as much research as possible before making a major decision. If Selka didn't have the neuropathy, would you opt for the amputation? You know your dog: how would he react to having to get around on 3 legs? Is he a fighter, or likely to become discouraged? And of course, you and Dan have to agree on a course of treatment, too. I have no words of wisdom for you, just tons of sadness that you are having to face this terrible disease. Do what your heart tells you is the right thing for Selka.


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## CarolinaCasey (Jun 1, 2007)

There is not a right and a wrong answer, I really wish that there was a flow chart that could just lead us to the correct decision.

If I had to put myself into your shoes, I don't know what I would do. Casey is 12 years and 1 month old. If he had osteosarcoma, I don't know if my parents would choose now to operate. He gets around well, but he had HD as a puppy and had surgery. His back legs are weak, you can especially see it when he poops and sometimes on walks or up/down steps. I just don't know if he could do three legs. And in 5-7 months, who knows if his genes would allow him to live that long anyway, despite a cancer. And what if he only lives a few months longer because his body gives out just due to age? I've just made his last few months a living hel l. *sigh* I guess, when I play all of these things out in my head, I would choose to just SPOIL the heck out of him and make some beautiful and fun memories in the short time we have left. That's what I'd do. I don't know if that helps, but I can sympathize with this large decision you have ahead of you.


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## goldencontriever3 (Nov 7, 2008)

Oh Deb I am so sorry you are going through this. I have no experience with this or advice to give - only my prayers that you find peace with whatever decision you make. Follow your heart. Whatever decision you make will be the best for you and Selka. 

I also don't think your husband will hate you whatever decision you make.


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## lgnutah (Feb 26, 2007)

Just want to give an insight into pain as I am presently feeling the most intense pain I have ever experienced due to a "felon" which is an infection underneath my thumbnail. There is horrendous pressure against the nail and I had an xray to determine if the infection is in my bone. Last nght it felt as if my thumb had been hit with hammer except the pain never stopped. I can't think of anything but this pain
I don;t think it would be much of a life to live in pain


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## Ljilly28 (Jan 22, 2008)

It's such as lonely thing that only you can choose for your own dear dog. I know i have a guiding philosophy, but I am not sure if it will resonate with you. I will offer it though, making sure to say I respect the choice of amputation utterly and think it is brave & hopeful. 

In this situation, I would let my dog go and not amputate, but I would be heartsick about that choice while making it. I really cling on to the fact that I let Raleigh go without knowing horrible pain at all in all his days. I don't believe dogs fear death like we do or count time the same way- it is only about pain and sparing them that experience. I let my Cady linger too long in my indecision and panic, and it haunts me still. Joplin died in my arms, my tears in his fur, snuggled up with me. He did not seem at all afraid, and there was a peaceful hush over the room. I am glad I did not let him linger on and on confused by pain. 

I do believe that when there's oesteosarcoma, chances are it is in the lungs, small evil particles already there. However, then there is Meggie and her triumph, so it is really between you and Selka to go for that miracle that makes a short term pain worth a good quality of life future with the family who adores him or go for a certainty that pain will be spared this noble dog at his life's dignified end. 

. Whatever you decide, we will all support and your husband will not hate you but love you for your heart as big as the whole country.


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

Deb, I've never dealt with a situation like this. My only advice is to gather as much info as you can before making a decision. My prayers are with you all.... I know whatever you decide will be done with Selka's best interest at heart and done with a heart and mind filled with love. Also, try to talk to MJ. She went thru this with her Artica several years ago.


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## BayBeams (Jan 3, 2010)

I am so sorry you are having to make such a heartwrenching decision about your beloved Selka. I don't have an opinion on this choice but can understand the difficulties you are facing. 
A few years ago I had to decide about the removal of a portion of my senior dog, Beau's, upper jaw (maxilla). It was such a difficult decision but my dear Beau is managing fine and I am so grateful for the extended time we have together. However, the decision was not due to bone cancer which can make a terrible choice even more difficult.
My heart truly goes out to you....
You might want to take a look at a yahoo group that deals with canine cancer (it is called canine cancer). The group can be very supportive and was helpful in the decisions I made for Beau's melanoma and mast cell tumors.
Wishing you strength and peace to your heart during this difficult time.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

If his back legs were fine, I would be much more positive in my decision to amputate, even though it is not a simple surgery.

But his back legs are somewhat wobbly. He pees squatting, I think because when he tries to lift his leg he almost falls over.

And as someone mentioned, he is 11 and a half. Even though his father lived to be almost 17, Apollo didn't have cancer. An almost twelve yr old dog with cancer ....and three legs?


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## Oaklys Dad (Dec 28, 2005)

What every you decide for dear Selka you can trust that we all will be right behind you. Hopefully you have a little time before Selka begins to suffer to make an informed decision.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

You have all said so many heartfelt things that struck straight to my soul. 

Jill , your words made me cry. Thanks you so much . all of you.

In my heart, as Ann said my heart tells me the right thing to do for Selka is to not amputate and let him go whole and without pain. I know if I make that choice it will probably be soon as this disease strikes so fast and harsh. We may have very few days left together.


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## C's Mom (Dec 7, 2009)

My heart goes out to you. What a horrendous situation. Please try to get all the information you can first before deciding.
I had a beloved dog leave too soon and then I hung on to one for too long. Given what I know today I think I would choose to end their suffering sooner rather than later but this is a choice that only you and your husband can make. You know your Selka best. Sending strength to you all.


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## Neeko13 (Jul 10, 2010)

I'm with everyone else who has posted to your thread, you have a very very tough decision to make, and whatever decision u make, u must be satisfied with it...follow your heart... I have an 11 year old, and if I had to make the decision to remove one of his front legs, I probably would be taking his soul as well, he also is not steady on his back legs.....I pray that you also will pray for some guidance in this major decision.....None of us want our dogs to suffer, even for a day, good luck, Ill be thinking of you in the next few days....


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## FinnTastic (Apr 20, 2009)

Gosh, this is all happening so fast. Whatever you decide, I'm sure it will be what is best for you and Selka. Again, so sorry you are going through this.


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## Mad's Mom (Oct 28, 2008)

It breaks my heart reading this thread and what you are going through. The only little bit of advice I have is if possible, do not make a decision right way after talking to your vet tomorrow, as you are experiencing so much shock and grief right now, and it is alot of info. to take in. Even a few days to talk it over with your husband and think it over yourself may help you come to peace with whatever decision you make.


When Maddie was diagnosed with kidney failure at 16 months old and given a poor prognosis, I didn't actually have any decision to make, but do know I was numb with shock and dread the first few days. I'm blessed that she continues to beat the odds, but my biggest fear is the one you are facing now, having in the future to decide when we've given it enough fight, and making sure she does not suffer.

You have every bit of support from me in whatever decision you make, as you know and love Selka more than anyone, and will make the best choice for you all.

I pray you have more happy days ahead with your precious boy.


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## my4goldens (Jan 21, 2009)

You have a very tough decision to make and only you can make it. I too have an 11 1/2 year old with a weak back end, and if ever faced with the choice you are facing, I think I would not be able to amputate one of his front legs. My Rusty would not be able to get along on three legs either, with how weak his back legs can be at time. God bless you and Selka and I am sure you will make the right decision for your Selka.


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## mm03gn (Sep 24, 2008)

This is such a hard decision, and I am so sorry that you are going through this. 

I can say what I would do, but until I am in that situation, I cannot say for certain. 

Ideally, I would make the decision that would cause the least amount of pain for my dog, even if it caused me more pain. But I know that decision is an impossible one. 

My gut tells me that Selka would suffer more if he went through an amputation at this point in his life. I do not know all of the details, nor the probability of success...but I fear that it will be harder for you to see him go through that...

There is no easy decision, and I am just heartbroken for you.

I'm so so sorry


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## hotel4dogs (Sep 29, 2008)

Whatever decision you make will be the right one. Thoughts and prayers go out to you.


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## amy22 (May 11, 2008)

Such a difficult decision...I KNOW you will make the right one for your boy.


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## Dallas Gold (Dec 22, 2007)

Right now you are in shock from the diagnosis today. My best advice is to wait just a day or more to let the shock pass before making a final decision on anything. It took me several days after Barkley's diagnosis to think straight enough to make a decision regarding treatment. If I had made the decision that first day I think I would have regretted it later. As the others have said, whatever decision you make will be the best for Selka because you have his best interests foremost in your mind.


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## SweetSoul (Apr 27, 2010)

I am so sorry you have to make this decision. I don't have any insightful advice, but I can tell you the experience I went through with my soul dog. She battled mast cell cancer for over 4 years - it was a heart wrenching battle. We also had to decide whether to amputate, she had ED in both front legs. We really thought about it, but I swear when I looked at her, the concern on her face, the pleading in her eyes, the worry - I knew in my soul she was telling me she did not want to fight anymore. I also knew that it was only me who was afraid to let her go. So we decided to let her just live whatever time we had left to it's fullest. I did sit down with her and tell her both with words and with my heart. For the last few weeks I told her 100 times a day (not even kidding) how very much I loved her, how amazing she was, and how proud I was of her. I kissed her, smelled her, held her, took her for ice cream... we did everything that we knew she loved and made her happy. Also, told her that I was not afraid anymore and promised her that we would all survive without her, eventhough it would be hard. In the end, quite unexpectedly, her hips went out. She was in such pain...but we soothed her, comforted her, and invited all the people she loved to come over and say goodbye. She laid there under the sun and wagged her tail, smiling as she said goodbye to all her friends. We let her go, it was right, it hurt like hell. I will never be the same, but in a good way. I know I was blessed beyond words to have been loved by her, to have been healed by her, to have been saved by her. I will thank her every single day of my life until I see her again. 

My only advice is that there truly is no right or wrong. Look into your heart and follow that. I support you with whatever decision you ultimately make. You will be in my every prayer. (((hugs)))


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## 2golddogs (Oct 19, 2009)

I truly just don't know what to say. This is such a gut wrenching time for you. You love Selka and will make the right decision for your beloved dog. Sending prayers and hugs.


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## Belle's Mom (Jan 24, 2007)

I have been following the updates all day and am just so sorry. I do not know what I would do....all I can do is pray for wisdom and peace with your decision.


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## Meggie'sMom (Dec 24, 2007)

No advice from me, but tears and support for whatever you decide. You will what is best, you love him so much, how could you not?


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## ckp (Mar 26, 2009)

Debles said:


> In my heart, as Ann said my heart tells me the right thing to do for Selka is to not amputate and let him go whole and without pain. I know if I make that choice it will probably be soon as this disease strikes so fast and harsh. We may have very few days left together.


I am so sorry about Selka...my heart is just heavy reading about him. I support your decision of not amputating...I would do the same thing. 

I am truly sorry...my thoughts are with your family and Selka.


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## Jackson'sMom (Oct 13, 2007)

Ljilly28 said:


> It's such as lonely thing that only you can choose for your own dear dog. I know i have a guiding philosophy, but I am not sure if it will resonate with you. I will offer it though, making sure to say I respect the choice of amputation utterly and think it is brave & hopeful.
> 
> In this situation, I would let my dog go and not amputate, but I would be heartsick about that choice while making it. I really cling on to the fact that I let Raleigh go without knowing horrible pain at all in all his days. I don't believe dogs fear death like we do or count time the same way- it is only about pain and sparing them that experience. I let my Cady linger too long in my indecision and panic, and it haunts me still. Joplin died in my arms, my tears in his fur, snuggled up with me. He did not seem at all afraid, and there was a peaceful hush over the room. I am glad I did not let him linger on and on confused by pain.
> 
> ...


Thinking about everyone's comments reminded me of the awful day when we learned from the surgeon that Gage had hemangiosarcoma and that it had spread. We made the decision to not allow him to wake up from the surgical anesthetic. We knew he had little time left, and we didn't want him to spend it in pain, either from the cancer or from the abdominal surgery. So we let him go. It was the best thing for him.

Given Selka's back leg issues and the pain of amputation, I would be inclined to make his remaining time incredibly special, to spoil him rotten, to do everything he loves to do for as long as he is able, then let him go before the pain gets bad. I would not amputate. These dogs are so stoic, they have to really be in pain before they show us they are hurting. All things considered, that is what I would do.

Of course, whatever you and Dan decide will be the right thing for Selka, and I'm sure everyone on this forum will support whichever decision you make. Listen to your heart, talk it over with Dan, and talk to Selka. You will know what to do for your boy.


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## Bender (Dec 30, 2008)

I am bawling reading all of this. So sorry for the news, but I'm sure your choices will be the best for him. In the meantime, spoil him rotten, give him whatever he wants and know we're thinking of you all. 

I know with Turbo, my border collie, he had good and bad days, then one day the bad days took over. He was fairly comfortable for his last week, didn't eat much, but still went out to pee on the tree and sniff around. His last night he did have a hard time, couldn't get comfortable and I knew it was time. Got a vet to come to the house, we shut the blinds, put his bed in the front room and lit candles, took him out for one last walk on the grass and then brought him inside. He was with his family to the end, Bender by his side and his head in my lap, and he is very missed.

I will pray for both of you.

Lana


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## 3459 (Dec 27, 2007)

Dear, dear Deb . . . I wish, I wish, I wish . . . Oh, how I wish you and Dan and your beautiful Selka were being spared this. These amazing golden loves bring us so much joy. The sweet time we have with them can never be long enough, and the decisions for what's best for them are hard beyond words, infinitely personal and unavoidably lonely -- especially for someone with a heart as big as yours!

We all love you and will support you and your decision completely. Sending many, many prayers your way for strength and wisdom and a peaceful heart that will let you know.


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## tippykayak (Oct 27, 2008)

Hi Deb,

I'm so, so sorry to hear about Selka. Jill's philosophy and advice are totally in line with what I would say. While I agonized over foregoing chemo with Gus, I do believe it was ultimately the right decision to let him go.

Selka is substantially older than the average age for Goldens. You have done a wonderful job getting him so far as it is, and he has surely lived a happy, rich life. 

The only thing I know for sure is that when you make the decision with the dog's best interests at heart, it's the right decision. We cannot act with perfect knowledge of all eventualities, but we can act with great love.

I don't envy your decision. I can only say that I'm sure you'll make the right one.


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## BeauShel (May 20, 2007)

Deb, 
I have been thinking of you and Selka all evening. In thinking of everything you have gone thru today, I would sleep on it and talk with an oncologist tomorrow or as soon as possible. But knowing about Selka's neuropathy in his back legs, I would lean towards enjoying whatever good quality days he has left spoiling him, loving him and telling him all your secrets. And then when the time comes you can rest better knowing you did the best for him and the best for your family. There is no right or wrong answer only what is right for you. 
We are here for you and Dan supporting you. My heart is breaking for you. (((HUGS)))


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Thank you everyone. I have been praying and I believe God speaks through people and I hear his voice in all your words. You are all a wonderful family here to me and so many others who have needed this kind of love and support. And you know how very much I love my dear boy and I don't want him to suffer for a minute. So I am praying God and Selka will let me know when it is time.
Bless you all for your support and sharing.

My sweet boy is dreaming right now, lying on the couch twitching. He is peaceful.


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## KiwiD (Jan 14, 2008)

I'm so sorry to hear of Selka's diagnosis. Ultimately you'll make the right decision for Selka as hard as that will be for you. Sending lots of thoughts and prayers your way.


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## Jazz & Jules (Feb 25, 2007)

You have my love, my heart and my prayers Deb. One of the phrases that holds me strong when it comes to Artie:

I let her going knowing she had cancer, not keeping her alive knowing the cancer had her.

And as I told you earlier, you are handling this with so much grace and dignity Deb and I so admire your stength. Your love for Sellka shines through your words. Please give that sweet sweet boy a gentle hug from Auntie MJ, light that candle and have that heart to heart.


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## BajaOklahoma (Sep 27, 2009)

Almost a year ago, Bennett was found to have a ruptured spleen and required emregency surgery. 
Before his spleenectomy, I asked the internist to help me do the best thing for Bennett, quality over quantity.

When he had not bounced back postop, they discovered he had lympboma and it was not good. Quality over quantity.
I miss him everyday. It was the worse day of my life, but I know I did the right thing.

You will make the right choice.


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## Ljilly28 (Jan 22, 2008)

It's impossible to read this thread without tears spilling down, because this is Deb and Selka's struggle today and it is all of our struggle one of these days if not on a past day in the near or distant past. Cancer gets our goldens, steals them from us, nearly every one. I look into Tally's face right now and shudder that the enemy lurks out there, and I see Selka as a Knight whose time has come to be brave. I hope some day the disease will be conquered, but in the meantime, I celebrate all of us who find the courage to love these perfect dogs all in even though we may lose them in a minute. A piece of medium rare steak to every forum golden today. . . maybe a baby cone of ice cream, a walk, and a game of fetch. The only answer to this is to jampack their lives with the things they love, and then find the inward strength to say goodbye before they suffer.


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## cham (Feb 21, 2008)

Deb,

Pls don't let the Vet talk you into anything until you have a chance to digest it. Amputation works, but until or if you find the cause of the hindquarter neuropathy, amputation will just make things harder for you and Dan. It will be one thing if a simple thing like Gabapentin will help control and strengthen his rear legs then you might consider amputation, but it's hard call as to how much time Selka will gain. 
Follow your heart and head, and not some DVM. You will know what Selka needs when the time comes.

Love you
Nancy


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## goldensrbest (Dec 20, 2007)

From, my experience with having two dogs have this, if his back legs would be able to carry him well, perhaps i would, but with what you said, and the trouble he would have, as hard as it is, for him, i would not.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

He is in pain. He is panting alot while trying to walk. I don't think even with meds, his hind legs can do it and I don't wnat him to suffer more through such a painful surgery. I love him so much. It was a horrible night.. Dan nor I, neither of us slept.


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## goldensrbest (Dec 20, 2007)

I am sooo sorry, the pain of this cancer is horrible.


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## paula bedard (Feb 5, 2008)

Oh Deb, I am so so sorry. I missed this diagnosis for Selka...it must have been very sudden. I'm at a loss for words and fighting tears. Please know that my prayers are with you. I wish I could give you a hug and hold your hand...


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## Cathy's Gunner (Dec 4, 2008)

So sorry you are going through this.... I'm just so sad, it makes me sick!


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## Jenny Wren (Feb 27, 2007)

> It's impossible to read this thread without tears spilling down, because this is Deb and Selka's struggle today and it is all of our struggle one of these days if not on a past day in the near or distant past. Cancer gets our goldens, steals them from us, nearly every one. I look into Tally's face right now and shudder that the enemy lurks out there, and I see Selka as a Knight whose time has come to be brave. I hope some day the disease will be conquered, but in the meantime, I celebrate all of us who find the courage to love these perfect dogs all in even though we may lose them in a minute. A piece of medium rare steak to every forum golden today. . . maybe a baby cone of ice cream, a walk, and a game of fetch. The only answer to this is to jampack their lives with the things they love, and then find the inward strength to say goodbye before they suffer.


Jill--one of the most beautiful things anyone has ever said...to Deb, to me, to all of us who suffer through saying goodbye to these sweet souls... they are such a blessing to us...and it hurts so much to let them go...and yet we must...


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## Sophie_Mom (Jan 21, 2009)

I'm reading all of these posts, and my heart breaks for you. I can't imagine the agony your heart is feeling. I'm just so so sorry.


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## Bob Dylan (Mar 31, 2009)

I personally would not amputate, but it is not my decision.
Cancer took my Bobby within 12 hrs. and I made the decision to have him PTS.
My vet said he was in very critical condition and would not live very long.
I pray God will help you and Dan with whatever has to be.
Give Selka HUGS & KISSES from us.

God Bless you, Dan, Selka and Gunner.


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## CarolinaCasey (Jun 1, 2007)

Tears spill down my face, for Deb & Selka, and for the beautiful and eloquent words of Jill. They are so true and that is what I think makes me shed these tears. Today is Selka's battle, we support him and hope to give him strength because we never know IF or when it will be our turn. So, we rally together and stay strong for the breed we love and the ones that they love. 

Strength and prayers are pouring out from me for Selka. Please keep us updated.


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

Oh Deb, I'm so sorry. My prayers and love are with you.


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## animallover (Jul 18, 2010)

Hi Deb. Just wanted to offer my prayers to you and Selka. Just enjoy the time left with Selka. I wouldn't want my Emma to suffer... Will be praying for you and that you are at peace with your decision, dear.


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## Duke's Momma (Mar 1, 2007)

Good morning, dear friend.

You are at the vets as I type. I am with you and feel I know what is going on. I pray peace for you, Dan and Selka. As Brian said - any decision made out of love is the right decision. I'll be looking for a return post. I can only imagine how exhausted you all must be.


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

This is just so horrible. I have cried and cried for you and Selka and I just know you through the fourm. How heartbreaking to be the one it is happening to.

When I took Copper to his ortho vet last week, he thought there might be a mass requiring amputation of his right front leg. It turns out he was wrong and we have dodged the bullet again, but I had already decided that Copper's back end would not be able to handle being his main source of mobility. It sounds like Selka's hips are in the same shape.

I hope they can find something to give him relief and you get some more quality time to say good-bye even though there never is a good time to say good-bye.

I wish it wasn't so and all I can do is pray for you to have peace and darling Selka to be pain free.

He does have the sweetest face. I've always loved seeing his pictures. I remember when goldensrbest was looking for a relative to her spencer thinging "GReat, he was related to Selka. What a beautiful line of dogs".


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## ckp (Mar 26, 2009)

Crying and thinking about Selka this morning...man, these goldens just TUG at my heart!!

I wish we weren't faced with hard situations like this...it's just heartbreaking.

Give Selka hugs from us and know that you are in my thoughts - and so many more on this forum are thinking of you, your husband and your pups....


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

I have to admit that I am not sure I wuld have been strong enough to go with what my mind said was right (no amputation) if I had been faced with it for real. I pray you have strength and peace and that Selka does too.

Huge hugs to you. I'll keep you in my thoughts and prayers.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Debles*

Debles

I pray for strength and peace for you and Selka.
These decisions are heartwrenching and oh so difficult.


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## fostermom (Sep 6, 2007)

Deb, my heart is with you in this difficult decision.

If this were my Jasmine, who is 9 1/2 and has had two FHOs so has hips that aren't as strong as a dog who hasn't had that surgery, I would definitely pass on the amputation. I know for sure that it would hinder her quality of life because she is such an active girl and I wouldn't be willing to do that.

I am so sorry.


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## Jackson'sMom (Oct 13, 2007)

If only our collective tears could wash away the cancer and the pain and make dear Selka whole again. My heart is breaking for Selka and his family. I know from experience that the suddenness of it all makes losing a beloved dog so much more painful than it already is.


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## amy22 (May 11, 2008)

Deb, you are at the vet now Im sure and making that tough decision for you and Selka. He knows you love him and he trusts you. My prayers are with you now...Im so sorry that you all are going through this. Know that we are all here for you in whatever decision you make. I know how hard it is for you, I have been in your shoes. Sending you many many hugs. xxoo Amy


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## nixietink (Apr 3, 2008)

Thinking of you today Deb, Selka, and Dan. I'm so sorry about the decision you have to make. Whatever you do choose, it will be the best. 

Jill's words are beautiful and just so true.


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## momtoMax (Apr 21, 2009)

Deepest sympathies...I don't know really what to say other than I am so very sorry this is happening to you.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Debles*

Debles

We are all with you, Selka, Dan and Gunner, in spirit.


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## paula bedard (Feb 5, 2008)

Deb has posted a new comment on FB, she should be updating here soon.


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## 2golddogs (Oct 19, 2009)

Deb,

I have thought about Selka all night and this morning. Praying for strength and peace for you, Dan and Selka. We're all crying tears for you today.


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## goldencontriever3 (Nov 7, 2008)

You are in our thoughts and prayers.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Bumping*

Bumping up for prayers for Selka and his family.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

*Our vet is a very wonderful man. He loves dogs and didn't put pressure on us. He does believe amputation relieves much of their pain and they have had some dogs make it a year or more in similar circumstances with amputation and chemo.*

But Selka has neuropathy issues in his hind legs and it is a horrendous surgery.
He said they are in alot of pain the first week and then they have to learn (if they are able) to get around on three legs.

So we have decided against amputation. I can't do that to him (and I mean the pain. I would do it if the outcome were sure of good outcome)
We can give him as much pain med as needed, the vet will come to our house when it is time.

I think maybe you have reached acceptance when instead of hoping for a cure, you want freedom from pain and a peaceful Goodbye. I love my boy that much.

Thank you all for all your prayers and support. I don't know how much time we have. I am going to get ice cream and treats for him. He is still wagging his tail and looking at me with such love. Dan had to carry him into the car and out and back. I don't want him to have to endure a bumpy car ride again. It had to hurt so much on his poor shoulder and arm.


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## magiclover (Apr 22, 2008)

Sometimes the hardest part is making the actual decision on what to do. I pray that you find peace in your decision and know that whatever it is you have done the right thing for Selka, for you and Dan and for Gunner.

All of us here who have had the honor of loving a Golden know the fear and heartache of losing them someday. But would we have it any other way? The joy of such a precious and pure love is a blessing and worth every moment both good and bad. You are in my thoughts and prayers dear friend.


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## marieb (Mar 24, 2008)

Deb, I am sure you are doing the best thing for Selka and your love for him shines through. Just spoil him like crazy and enjoy all of the time you have with him!! I will be thinking about Selka and your family ...


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

I hope I can be as brave as Brian with Gus. I don't want Selka to suffer more than I want him to be here with me which is boundless.
I am a zombie, no sleep, no food since Sunday(who would ever believe that about me!) I just want to be here with my boy.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Chris, Magic reminds me so of Selka. It is so bittersweet.


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

Debles said:


> I think maybe you have reached acceptance when instead of hoping for a cure, you want freedom from pain and a peaceful Goodbye. I love my boy that much.


Your love for your boy is so evident. As hard as it is, I think that with his neurolgical issues you were right to not choose amputation.

I'll keep Selka and his whole family in my heart and prayers.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Debles*

Debles

Yes, you have reached acceptance when you hope for freedom from pain and a peaceful goodbye. Spoil Selka with ice cream and other very delicious foods and your kisses and hugs.

So glad Selka can have as many pain meds as he needs and that the vet will come to the house.

You have made the right decision not to amputate-with such an UNSURE outcome because of Selka's neuropathy, I could not put my dog through the pain.

We are all here for you, but I know how ALONE and LONELY you can feel in this.


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## Cathy's Gunner (Dec 4, 2008)

Deb, I went home and hugged my Gunner and had a good cry. I think you made the right decision. I know Selka will get a ton of love and care for his remaining days. Try to take care of you too. Hugs, love and prayers coming your way.....


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## paula bedard (Feb 5, 2008)

Deb, Sending prayers of strength, peacefulness, and comfort to you and Selka as you travel this last path together. I wish there were words to lessen the pain. It hurts so terribly only because you have loved him so completely.


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## cubbysan (Mar 13, 2007)

Deb, I have been hurting for you since yesterday. I know that know matter what decision you make, you are going to always wonder if you should have done the other. 

My vet once had a very good talk with me about this. She said to just remember "dogs live in the present". They don't think about the future. They have no concept of time. They don't think, "I want just one more Christmas with my family.

I have not had experience with osteasarcoma, but I did have two 10 year old GSD's put down to cancer of the spleen. Both cases were so far advanced there was no time to seek other options.

My very first dog Cubby was suffering from kidney failure. I have always felt guilty for holding on as long as we did. We had him at the vet the last week of his life, hoping for an improvement. I really believe now that we held on to him too long for our own selfish reasons.

If I were in your situation, as hard as it would be, I would probably just give Selka a lot of extra love, and not go for the amputation. If he were younger, it might be different. Those months of chemo, would they make him feel very ill? Being a senior dog, can his heart and other organs even take it? If he does survive all that, how much time will he have after that even if he dies of old age?

Hugs going to you, your husband and Selka.


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## cubbysan (Mar 13, 2007)

A vet told my brother-in-law when his dog was diagnosed with cancer is "Remember that the dog does not know he has cancer." 

When you are with him, remember he does not know he is sick, and that he is just living for that day. Hugs to you all.


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## Elisabeth Kazup (Aug 23, 2008)

My heart breaks for you. I pray you find peace in your decision. I left my first Golden and my beloved horse way too long. They suffered because I thought there was a cure somewhere out there. Enjoy your time together, you'll know when 'it's time'. Sending prayers and hugs.


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## LifeOfRiley (Nov 2, 2007)

Oh Deb, my heart is just breaking for you right now. I wish there was something that any of us could say or do to make this easier, to lessen the pain for you. I know what a difficult decision it is and how lonely it feels having to make it. Just remember that you're _not_ alone. We've been through it and we're all here for you.

For what it's worth, I believe that you're making the right decision for Selka. You're putting his well-being before your own. You're willing to suffer so that he won't. In the end, I believe there's no greater act of love.


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## GoldenCamper (Dec 21, 2009)

Debles said:


> So we have decided against amputation. I can't do that to him (and I mean the pain. I would do it if the outcome were sure of good outcome)
> We can give him as much pain med as needed, the vet will come to our house when it is time.
> 
> I think maybe you have reached acceptance when instead of hoping for a cure, you want freedom from pain and a peaceful Goodbye. I love my boy that much.


Just wanted to say I fully support you in your decision and am very sorry for the diagnosis. Enjoy every day with Selka. I wish you strength and send my thoughts and prayers to you and yours.


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## Jazz & Jules (Feb 25, 2007)

Well Deb, that was yet another hurdle crossed in your past 24 hours of living hell. Take a breath, and for Selka and Gunners sake, please eat my friend.

As part of our daily routine, we live our lives to co-exist with each other. Let's take a vacation, but can we take the dogs? Let's go to this party but get home early for the dogs. Let's get a new car, will the dogs be able to jump in? Let's buy this new outfit, it won't show the dog hair. Let's get new floors and carpeting, but it has to work for the dogs.

Then we learn a 'timeline'. 

Suddenly, nothing else in life is important. Don't mention party to me, not going. Vacation, maybe next year. Car's, clothes, floors, whatever. Our love has become richer, deeper, more valued and sometimes we even feel our own mortality lurk upon us.

Now from a dogs perspective: I love Mom. I love Dad, I love to eat. I love to play. I love to sleep. I love when Mom and Dad come home after a long day. I love when Mom and Dad come back from the mail box. Gosh it seems like they have been gone forever, but their here now and that's great! I love to sneak a lick of your ice cream, I know you saved a bite just for me. I love to snuggle at your feet or in your lap, I just love when you are touching me.

Now after they have learned there's a 'timeline':

I love Mom. I love Dad, I love to eat. I love to play. I love to sleep. You get the idea. They love deeply every single day of their lives. 

They have NO regrets.

If I knew my own 'timeline', I can't say I wouldn't have any regrets. Quite the opposite in fact.

What I'm trying to say here, is each day for our pets is a gift to them. I know eating is not a priority, but it is up to you to honor their gift to us, their love, their partnership by also continuing to take care of ourselves.

There will be time to grieve later. Later, the loneliness will engulf your heart. Later, nothing is going to stop the pain you are feeling, but for now, live each day to it's fullest, love the deepest.....have no regrets.


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

MJ... that is SO SO true and poignant. Their gift to us comes from above.


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## goldensrbest (Dec 20, 2007)

You may find that he would like laying on a cool surface, i found that both of mine , and also spencer liked that.


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## magiclover (Apr 22, 2008)

Debles said:


> Chris, Magic reminds me so of Selka. It is so bittersweet.


 
I know what you mean. Selka and Magic are so special, beyond words. I am really enjoying my time here at home but I cannot wait to get back to England and just wrap my arms around Magic and Jazz. It kills me to leave them for any length of time, especially Magic because I know time is so precious with her.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Thank you everyone. I am so blessed to have this wonderful place.
I will eat MJ. It is just surprising for ME to have no desire to eat at all.

Here are some photos of my beautiful boy today. : )


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

SO SO precious Deb.


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## Jazz & Jules (Feb 25, 2007)

Just look at him soaking up the sunlight. Kisses from Heaven.


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## esSJay (Apr 13, 2009)

MJ you said it so true. 

Deb, my heart goes out to you and your family. We are all here for you and I'm hoping that Selka still has many days with you. Squeeze him a little tighter and cuddle him a little longer. I will be doing the same with Molson when I get home tonight.


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## nixietink (Apr 3, 2008)

He looks so happy.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

Beautiful pictures .. you can see the love and trust in his eyes and that he knows you came to the best decision for him .. perhaps not for you, but through your love for him. Hug him and hold him tight while you can.


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## Neeko13 (Jul 10, 2010)

Oh he looks sooo precious....my eyes are tearing.....he looks like my Nitey....I will continue to pray for you both for the strength, love and companionship to nurture your sweet Selka for as long as it takes.....thoughts and hugs with u both at this time....


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## goldensrbest (Dec 20, 2007)

He is so handsome, i don't even know him, or you, but i am so sad.


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## twinny41 (Feb 13, 2008)

So sorry to hear the news of Selkas diagnosis. Sending thoughts from across the pond and wishing you and Selka didn't have to go through this


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## Dallas Gold (Dec 22, 2007)

I especially like Selka's second photo, those big brown expressive eyes. 

Deb, you do need to eat, for your own health. Also, I found increasing my Omega 3 and Vitamin D supplementation helped me handle my emotions so much better during our cancer journey and now with the journey we are taking with my father in law's stroke.


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

Selka is such a good looking boy! I also like the second picture the best, but I like all of his pics.

MJ said it better than I could. All of you will be in my thoughts and prayers. I am so terribly sorry. Remember that Selka does not know his diagnosis and just enjoy your time together as best you can.


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

My heart breaks reading all these posts...I also think you made a very hard choice but one best for Selka. Enjoy every second you have with him


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## Jenny Wren (Feb 27, 2007)

MJ's advice is again so well spoken...thank you for sharing that with all of us.

Deb--Selka is one handsome fellow now isn't he. Look at his eyes, look at his smile, he is so in love...and so secure in life. He knows he has the best parents and that you will do the right thing by him.

I know this is so hard--but try to forget. Instead, enjoy every single second of your togetherness. 

You and he are so special Deb....flooding the waves with prayers... (((Hugs)))


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## Augie's Mom (Sep 28, 2007)

A decision which comes from the heart is always the right one. I'm sorry events are happening so fast. Trust in your heart and Selka, to show you the way.

(((Hugs)))to you and Selka


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## Sophie_Mom (Jan 21, 2009)

He's gorgeous - What a happy sweet boy. Take lots of pictures. Savor the moments. If you are the journaling type, write down all of the sweet memories you will be collecting. Squeeze years of love into each day with him. I'm praying for you all.


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## missmarstar (Jul 22, 2007)

I thought of Selka and you all night, Deb. I still can't find the words to say how sad I am for you... I've always loved your boys and feel your pain and sadness.


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## fostermom (Sep 6, 2007)

Selka has such a beautiful soft expression.


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## Rochester (Apr 6, 2010)

I don't know you, but I feel your pain. I went through a similar situation in March. In my heart of hearts, I believe you made the right decision. These goldens fool us. They are so very stoic... it is especially hard for us to make decisions like this. We feel like we are betraying their trust and love, but we aren't. They do not fear death. They trust that we will make the right decision for them, not what is right for us. We want them to live forever, but to put them through unnecessary pain is not, in my opinion, the right decision.

Letting our girl go to her final resting place was the most difficult decision I've had to make to this point in my life. Many tears were shed. I held her in my arms and it was very peaceful. I knew her days of pain were behind her. It still brings tears to my eyes thinking about it, but the good memories far outweigh the sad.

Take solace in knowing that you are doing what is best for Selka.


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## Katie and Paddy's Mum (Mar 31, 2010)

Ljilly28 said:


> It's impossible to read this thread without tears spilling down, because this is Deb and Selka's struggle today and it is all of our struggle one of these days if not on a past day in the near or distant past. Cancer gets our goldens, steals them from us, nearly every one. I look into Tally's face right now and shudder that the enemy lurks out there, and I see Selka as a Knight whose time has come to be brave. I hope some day the disease will be conquered, but in the meantime, I celebrate all of us who find the courage to love these perfect dogs all in even though we may lose them in a minute. A piece of medium rare steak to every forum golden today. . . maybe a baby cone of ice cream, a walk, and a game of fetch. The only answer to this is to jampack their lives with the things they love, and then find the inward strength to say goodbye before they suffer.


Words absolutely fail me in this situation. When I read the above ^^^ I was just struck with not only the beauty/eloquence of what was said, but the wisdom in it as well. 
I feel so very touched by what you are going through, and the above explains that so well.

My heart goes out to your family so much at this time. It has been a harrowing and emotionally exhausting few days for you guys. It is my belief that your decision not to amputate was the best one...and made with your love for Selka as the primary motivator. I applaud and envy your courage.

Like others have also written, spoil him rotten. YOu sound like you have a wonderful vet that will be there for you when the time is right. In the meantime just treasure the time you have left. 
I loved the pictures you took. He does look like a wise boy. That second picture really captured the Golden essence. 

Please know you're in my prayers. I wish I could say more to you. I am happy that you have so many wonderful friends on this forum.

All the very best to you. - Kim


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## firedancer722 (Apr 12, 2010)

I haven't been on this board for very long, and I really don't know you at all, but I find my heart completely breaking for you. I have had my Charlie for 4 months, and I can't even fathom the thought of losing him, so how heartbreaking this must be for you to face losing your sweet boy. This post serves as a wonderful reminder to me and to everyone to love our canine companions every minute of every day, and to never take a moment for granted. 

I truly believe goldens are a gift from God. Be with your boy, soak in his ever present love, snuggle in his soft fur, tell him all the reasons you love him and all the ways he has brought joy to your life. And we can all do this anytime... everyday, if we want. I know I'm going to make an effort to do so.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

My daughters and grandsons came to see Selka today. My youngest daughter was still in high school when we got Selka as a puppy.
She is devastated as much as us.
My four year old grandson when told Selka was sick and isn't going to get better, broke into tears crying "I don't want Selka to die, then there won't be "Selka and Gunner" anymore. and we will only have three dogs and we need four" (He is counting their golden and my other daughter's golden who are Gunner's brother and Selka is their uncle.)

The photos are my daughter and Selka when she was in high school.


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## 2golddogs (Oct 19, 2009)

The photos are priceless. Selka is a beautiful, sweet boy. Praying for you and your family.


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

I sure do love Selka's "senior" face that I have come to know and love, but I must say - he has always been quite the looker.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Here are pics of my grandson and Selka today and my daughter with Selka.


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## Duke's Momma (Mar 1, 2007)

OH, thanks, Deb! That picture of your daughter and Selka broke my heart. 

Beautiful pictures, though. He's just so handsome.


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

Ah, sweet little Colin with his good buddy. Your pictures are treasures Deb.


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## Abbydabbydo (Jan 31, 2007)

Awww Deb. You are doing the right thing and I know you have the strength to get through it but you have to take care of yourself.Allow yourself comforrt from family, you don't have to be stoic. Heck half the people on the board are crying already. 

You have made the best decision for Selka. You can tell him he got Finny out of the cone because after seeing your update this morning I called the doc and told them Finny was getting very lethargic and we needed other options. They said take it off!

And that was from realizing how limited my time is going to be with him and knowing how painful it will be to go through what you are going through.

We are here for you!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Selka*

What beautiful pictures, Deb.

Selka is and always will be a very beautiful and special boy.

My heart goes out to you, as this all happened so quickly with Selka.
It reminds me of what happened so quickly to our Snobear, 4 months ago.
It NEVER is easy-I also feel such empathy for the people and their dogs who go through a long and awful illness.


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## Abbydabbydo (Jan 31, 2007)

And the pictures are very touching!


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## Finn's Fan (Dec 22, 2007)

Deb, that photo of Colin and beautiful Selka is going to be so very precious to you; it made me cry right now. I hope that you are continuing to make wonderful memories with your darling dog. As impossible as it seems, save your tears until Selka tells you it's his time; you will cry rivers when he's flown on angel's wings. Memorize the feel of his fur under your hand, the shape of his head as you stroke it, the soft sigh as he lays down to rest. Feed him whatever he wants, sharing as you do it. Know that I'm sending hugs of strength to get you through the sorrow, wishes for a peaceful heart as you make decisions for Selka, and hopes that you know he will always be snuggled in your heart.......


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

It is so hard and I know so many of you understand and the one s who haven't been through it themselves obviously can imagine.

After Max died, I thought I could never love another dog/golden the way I loved Max but knew I didn't want to live without a golden in my life.
That puppy we brought home was Selka. He has become my best friend, my soul and I cannot imagine life without him, though I know for his sake , I will have to.

I know I am supposed to be strong and not let him see my tears but it just kills me to hold him, feel his fur, look into his eyes and know what I know. I am trying so hard to live in the moment as I have always tried to do.

Sometimes I think it is better not to know.. even though I have these days to cherish him and take more pictures and memories (we have thousands)

For those if you who know what this feels like, it is Hell and the pain is excruciating. I love him so.

Molly : he had hotdogs and ice cream for lunch and is having steak for dinner. : ) Gunnie too of course.


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

Oh Deb. I know your feelings, and I admire your strength and faith. You will help one another thru this, and although he will go ahead, he'll be around the bend waiting for you. In the meantime, you are right to cherish the moments and capture many.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Debles*

Debles

My heart and prayers are with you and Selka. 
I KNOW how horrible it is KNOWING.
God Bless you all!


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## Jazz & Jules (Feb 25, 2007)

Oh I saw the picture of your daughter on the floor with Selka and just lost it! I know that conversation all too well.

Yup, I can say many members are a collective mess right now Deb, right along with you, however, you are feeling it ten-fold.

What a wonderful day Selka is having today, bless him.


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## coppers-mom (Jan 9, 2009)

I remember when my dad was dying from cancer (9 years ago). I was told to not let him see me cry. The last night, he called me back when I had to leave the room. He knew where my tears were coming from.

Selka knows you love him and will lick the tears from your face. God gave you so much heart so you could share it with Selka - even if you have to cry while doing so.

I've lost both dogs and dearly loved people both knowing it was coming and not knowing. I must admit that in my selfish way, I liked having the time to say good-bye.


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## Dallas Gold (Dec 22, 2007)

Penny & Maggie's Mom said:


> Oh Deb. I know your feelings, and I admire your strength and faith. You will help one another thru this, and although he will go ahead, he'll be around the bend waiting for you. In the meantime, you are right to cherish the moments and capture many.


Not only will Selka be there around the bend waiting, I bet he will send you signs from above that all is okay, when the time comes for him to leave you. I'm still getting sweet little signs from my Bridge boys when I need them the most.


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## amy22 (May 11, 2008)

Oh Deb I love all the pictures you posted...what a handsome guy and soooo loved, you can see it in each picture..he KNOWS it!
My heart breaks for you all. Enjoy each day to the fullest, fill it with love.


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## Oaklys Dad (Dec 28, 2005)

I love the pictures from today. They really show how deeply he is loved. I hope he continues to have great days like today.


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## goldensrbest (Dec 20, 2007)

Iknow, it is so hard, you do the best you can, be cause you love him so, there may come a time, that you know that he knows, it did with spencer, you just put one foot in front of the other, and do what your heart tells you. I AM SO SORRY, for what has happened to that dear boy.


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## Jackson'sMom (Oct 13, 2007)

I cry every time I open this thread.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

I know Ann, I am sorry. I cry every time too. I am just sick, trying to be strong for my boy but my guts are aching with so much pain.

I know so many of you know how this feels. I have never felt it in advance. Knowing what is coming. I would like to be so serene and calm and at peace with enjoying every moment that we have left with our darling Selka. I am treasuring them yes, but it kills me. I stroke his fur and die myself afraid for what is coming. I want him to be with me, I don't want to lose him but I also don't know how long I can take feeling this way 24/7. It is worse than any physical pain/illness I have had.


When our other goldens died, even my heart dog Max, it was pretty fast, no warning. Max was sick but we didn't know till we had to say Goodbye that it was time.

I know some people think it is better to have the time to treasure him etc and it is.. but it is Hell at the same time.

Thank you for letting me say how I am feeling. I feel like I am going to explode or implode. It is just a heartbreaking nausea and pain and my boy is still here. I can't even bear to think about when he's not.


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## KiwiD (Jan 14, 2008)

Thank you for sharing the beautiful pictures of your boy. I haven't yet had to be where you are but my heart breaks for you knowing how difficult it is. Your love for him speaks volumes through your posts and I'm sorry that you have to be going thru this.


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## desilu (Nov 2, 2006)

I elected not to put my Winnie through a surgery when she was 13 years old. It would have been a tough surgery, requiring her to spend several days recovering at the vet's (and she hated being away from home) with no guarantee of getting all of the tumor. I don't regret it at all. She had much longer with me than I thought and when she was ready, I helped her go to the Bridge. I treasure those last minutes with her, even though the memories bring tears to my eyes now, 6 years later. 

Being a grown up and being responsible and making decisions like this sucks. But it is what we take on when we accept the awesome responsibility of caring for these creatures who are capable of so much love.

You will be able to do this, Deb. Your love for Selka and his for you will give you strength. And you have all the support of the members of this forum.


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## SweetSoul (Apr 27, 2010)

The pictures were just beautiful. They made me cry. My heart goes out to you and your whole family. You are in my every prayer.


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## Augie's Mom (Sep 28, 2007)

It is ok to cry and be sad, let him comfort you as you comfort him. It is what our goldens do best. You don't always have to be so strong. 

I wasn't serene, calm or at peace during this time, I was horribly sad. For me it was acceptance, knowing I couldn't change the outcome but I could make each remaining day meaningful (no regrets). 

The most important thing is that, he is still HERE!!! Savor the texture of his coat, his unique scent, the love you see in eyes when he looks at you. Hold on tight to the memories you are creating.





Debles said:


> I know Ann, I am sorry. I cry every time too. I am just sick, trying to be strong for my boy but my guts are aching with so much pain.
> 
> I know so many of you know how this feels. I have never felt it in advance. Knowing what is coming. I would like to be so serene and calm and at peace with enjoying every moment that we have left with our darling Selka. I am treasuring them yes, but it kills me. I stroke his fur and die myself afraid for what is coming. I want him to be with me, I don't want to lose him but I also don't know how long I can take feeling this way 24/7. It is worse than any physical pain/illness I have had.
> 
> ...


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## sameli102 (Aug 23, 2009)

Deb, this is such a heartwrenching thread, I am just so so sorry you are going through this. It brings back a flood of emotions, it was just one year ago in June that I lost my very first golden, my heart dog, to cancer at 8 and it was incredibly painful. I too had a 4 year old grandson at the time and that was as hard to deal with as my own heartache. He still talks about him to this day, just this afternoon. Sometimes I think having to be strong and brave for him helped me to be also. When I learned the news I bought him a delmonico steak and grilled it to just pink and juicy and sat in the yard and had a picnic hand feeding him each little bite while I cried and hugged him.
We're so powerless to do anything but love and cherish them but that is something we can do so well. Selka is a beautiful boy. Prayers to you and your family.


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## ckp (Mar 26, 2009)

Deb...the pictures are beautiful...the one with your daughter and Selka from today made me cry...I am sending lots of hugs to you, your family, Gunner and Selka...

I never really understood what the members of this forum meant when they wrote of their loving, affectionate, goofy, aloof goldens...Apple was so sick - she was in so much pain her whole life. But, oh, with Nascar...the golden life is truly amazing. We never knew life with a golden was this way - sooooo amazing!

I am so glad that you and your family have enjoyed so many years of pure happiness with Selka...the early pictures and pics from today are awesome. I hope the memories you have are helping you through this difficult time...especially the new memories you are making every moment with Selka....he is so loved, so so loved!!!


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## Mad's Mom (Oct 28, 2008)

Thinking of you Selka, and your whole family tonight, as I will continue to do for a long time. I think you've made an incredibly loving decision for you sweet boy. Those pictures brought me to tears again, but thank you for sharing, what an expressive face Selka has, and what a wonderful loving family.

Please always continue to express your feelings when you need to. You are with friends here who will try to help you in any way we can. As you know many of us have experienced the over whelming grief, anger, fear, and any other feelings (including extreme anxiety in my case) that losing a beloved pets brings. You are entitled to all of these feelings and emotions, cause you love your boy so much.

Wishing so much I could say or do something to help. I'm hoping you have more wonderful days like today with Selka. I know you will cherish every moment with him, just as I know he's got the best mom he could have ever found. 

You are all in my prayers.


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## Jazz & Jules (Feb 25, 2007)

Deb, you are safe here and I share my tears with you in the ruff of Jazz & Jules. I've been telling them all about Selka today and how special he is and how sad his Mommy is and I swear it feels like they are just sitting there listening to everything I say.


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## Meggie'sMom (Dec 24, 2007)

> The most important thing is that, he is still HERE!!! Savor the texture of his coat, his unique scent, the love you see in eyes when he looks at you. Hold on tight to the memories you are creating.


So lovely and so true. Give him all our love too.


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## momtoMax (Apr 21, 2009)

I wish I could hug you for real. Feeling so badly here in Pa for you...keeping you in my thoughts.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

I want to thank everyone for their calming words of love and strength. You are getting me through this and thus getting Selka through it. When I am feeling insane and like I might explode from the pain and break down, I come read your words of wisdom and support and it helps so much.
Thank you all!

More of my happy boy today.

Wow, sorry.. I couldn't tell these first two were so blurry.. I wasn't using a flash. : (


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## Penny & Maggie's Mom (Oct 4, 2007)

LOVE them ( and him), blurry or not.


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## Jazz & Jules (Feb 25, 2007)

Love, Love Love!!!!


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

In that last one he really looks like his dad. : )


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## Oaklys Dad (Dec 28, 2005)

The Selka shot with the pheasant in his mouth is priceless. Nice to see the boy isn't too sick to play. Nice of you to tell me that that shot of Selka was blurry as every single shot I have seen this week has been very blurry for some reason.


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## BeauShel (May 20, 2007)

Deb,

Seeing the pictures of your daughter, grandson and Selka just make me cry. But not so much with just sadness. It makes me cry with seeing the love between all of them. You can just see the love flowing in the pictures. And that is a very special and beautiful thing. 
Dont keep your tears bottled up, let Selka comfort you if you feel like crying or let Gunner dry your tears. Goldens to me are a special gift from God and love giving us comfort when we need it. Selka doesnt know what is coming he just is loving the extra treats, hugs and kisses so keep giving them. They help both of you feel better. Like MJ told me, lay on the floor talking to him, telling him your secrets and your feelings and he will listen and remember. And have that special candle. I still have mine. 
I have had yall on my mind ever since you gave us the news and are saying lots of prayers for you and the family. Please give Selka a big hug and kiss from me. I have always loved his handsome face.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Debles*

Debles

What beautiful pictures of your special boy, Selka.
Thinking of Selka and you all the time and sending prayers and love over to both of you.
I agree with so many others-talk to him and tell him how much you love him and your secrets!!


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## Hudson (May 18, 2005)

Deb, firstly I am so very sad, I have only just read about your darling boy and the tragic news and journey you are taking.
I havent been on the forum lately and missed this news.
Keep loving your boy, he has the most trusting beautiful brown eyes as he looks at you, enjoy every moment... as you are, and think of every single minute with him as a blessing. You have this time to love him and tell him how very special he is to you.You have given him a wonderful, wonderful life with fun filled holidays, and a family that love him so much. What a lucky golden boy to have been blessed with such a loving family!
When I found out my first golden Jessie had cancer, I told him every single day how special and loved he was, I think that really helped reflecting back, knowing I had time to prepare and spend this time with him. 
We are given these special goldens to love and cherish and when the time comes, our decisions are made out of great love to give them a death, with dignity and with out lingering suffering. 
Deb, thinking of you as you pray for a miracle for your sweet Selka.. as we also wish and pray that this dreaded disease be beaten and conquered. If only our goldens could live forever, life with out them is so painful and unthinkable.
My prayers and thoughts are with you and your family, Selka and Gunner.
Please give your boy a gentle hug from across the oceans. xxx


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## Cathy's Gunner (Dec 4, 2008)

Loved your pictures and just like Oakly's Dad said, the pictures were all a little blurry for me, through my tears.....

My Gunner has been getting lots more kisses and hugs these past two days...not that he doesn't get a bunch anyway but these are more special and meaningful....


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## kgiff (Jul 21, 2008)

Thinking about you and Selka. 

It's amazing how fast things can go from everything is fine to there is something wrong to we have to make a life altering decision and make it quickly. My heart goes out to you.


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## Solas Goldens (Nov 10, 2007)

I don't have any good advice. I just wanted to say I'm sorry, and in the end you have to make the best choice for you and your dog. I will send some prayers your way.


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## Neeko13 (Jul 10, 2010)

I've never met u or Selka, but would love to reach out an hug u both, tell u to be strong, and live for the moment......Selka, u are a true beauty, may u feel the love from your family, and enjoy what time u have left, you are a fine example of the true meaning of owning and loving a golden.....bless your heart and your soul, buddy.....


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## paula bedard (Feb 5, 2008)

Deb, 
The pictures of Selka with your family are both heart wrenching and heart warming and they will be a source of comfort for you in the days to come. Selka has the most angelic and joyful expression and that beautiful boy will be waiting alongside Max and your other beloved 4 footed children at the Bridge, to be with you once again.

I wish I had words to offer that might lessen your pain. I know what you're going through...words do not adequately describe the sense of helplessness as we watch our best friend fail before our eyes and know that the last act of love we can give them is to release them from the frailty of this world, to those waiting to greet them at the Bridge.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Bumping*

Bumping for prayers for Selka and Deb.


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## Merlins mom (Jun 20, 2007)

Oh Deb, my heart breaks for you and I am so sorry. Tears are spilling down my face reading all the words here of comfort and support. Know that you and Selka are in my thoughts. I just don't know what else to say. Sending hugs to you during this difficult time.


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## timberwolf (Apr 1, 2009)

Deb, I'm sorry for not posting sooner - just reading your first post breaks my heart and I haven't been able to read any further.
Know that you, Selka and your family are in my thought and prayers.


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## Maxs Mom (Mar 22, 2008)

Deb I have not read this full thread, but I read your original post. 

I have a friend who is a vet her take is that the amputation might control the pain for a while, but won't change the outcome. Oh man I hurt for you. 

Maxine was 12, hers was in her face, we were told she could be operable. It would have been a radical surgery to remove the tumor, which was located on her palate of her upper jaw. Our question was how she would come through. She had done great with her two knee surgeries but even then the second one 18 mons after the first was a much harder rehab. The older they get the harder the rehab time is (for humans too). There were other issues regarding Max that needed to be considered. OF COURSE "I" was all for it. I just wanted my dog. However my husband helped me see that we had to think about Max's best interest. It had to be about her. The one thing that meant the most to me. Of course in the end, she may have still come out of it with the cancer, and may not have been able to live to recover from the surgery. 

These decisions are so very hard. Our hearts get in the way of our heads. I was so grateful my husband helped me understand. Of course I didn't see Maxine getting older before the cancer either. She was immortal in my mind. She was just always going to be there....

You need to do what is best for Selka. I do not envy you. 

Ann


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