# whats the right thing to do?



## fatnedy&me (Sep 1, 2008)

ok so heres the story . i got my golden retriever from a good breeder about last year march . but hes totally wacko and hyper . hes furs everywehre in our house in our food too .he barks alot and chews EVERYTHING! we have a big backyard . but soon were moving to a small unit , so the yards gonna be heaps small . and im gonna be in senior school so ill be stacked up with homework, so i wont have as much time for him. my mum doesnt like him at all .
and she says his the biggest regret shes ever made . she says shes willing to swap him for a small dog . 
that would be good , because than ill wouldnt have to walk it as much ,it can stay inside and fit ourlife style more .
but , its so unfair to him! and what if we give him to what seems a loving family , and like all the other stories i hear , we come back to see him tied up at the back of the families yard , negleted and never getting walks.?and i love him so much and he costed so much !

is it true that they grow out of the hyper stage at 2-4 ? i cant leave it too long , because if i do sell him everyone wants a young dog .

im in a pickle !


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## LibertyME (Jan 6, 2007)

Goldens are big, furry, active dogs - as you now know...
You can not control the shedding without being willing to do the work to bathe and groom regularly...
You can not control the engery without taking the time to exercise...
You can not control the behavior without taking the time to train...

If your either of the adults in charge of the family do not like the family dog - then there is now way the dog is going to be treated and given the time/attention he deserves....

I would strongly suggest that your family not replace your Golden with a 'smaller dog' - but takes some time off and really do some soul searching - you may not be a family that is ready to own a dog of any breed.
Small dogs / different breeds have their own issues...
There are some small breeds that are just as active as a Golden...
There are some small breeds that require much more grooming then a golden...
All small dogs are deserving of the same amount of training as a Golden....


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## Hudson (May 18, 2005)

LibertyME said:


> Goldens are big, furry, active dogs - as you now know...
> You can not control the shedding without being willing to do the work to bathe and groom regularly...
> You can not control the engery without taking the time to exercise...
> You can not control the behavior without taking the time to train...
> ...


I agree, your family and yourself, must take time to train your golden,exercise and groom him. They are wonderful dogs but their behaviour is usually measured by the training and time you put into training them.They dont train themselves. If you are moving to an apartment, your golden will require exercise and walks at least twice a day.
I hope you can find a family that can give him the love and attention he needs. Small dogs still require all of the above.. so do you and your family really want a dog at all. They are a life time commitment and become part of the family.
I hope you can sort out what is best for your dog because you love him and want the best for him, it is very hard when you dont have your Mum's support.


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## jealous1 (Dec 7, 2007)

I have to agree with everything above and only want to add that you may want to contact a rescue that could ensure that your golden's future home would be a good one and match up to his/he personality.


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## Pointgold (Jun 6, 2007)

If you got this dog from a good breeder, then the breeder should be the first one contacted as far as taking the dog back. I'm sorry to sound harsh, but you are getting out of this poor dog exactly you are putting into it - very little. It should be no surprise that Goldens are active, hairy, and need plenty of attention. And while your mother might think that a smaller dog will be better, she'lll be just as surprised to find that smaller dogs are very busy, usually even MORE vocal than Goldens, and although on a smaller scale, they do shed, too. Please do plenty of homework before deciding on another dog so that the same thing doesn't happen. That homework should also include making an honest evaluation of your family and it's lifestyle, to determine whether the proper committment can/will be made to caring for _any _dog properly.


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## Emma&Tilly (May 15, 2005)

I would strongly consider rehoming him, it sounds like your family aren't really meeting his needs and are less likely to be able to when you move and you have more school work...if I were you I would contact the breeder you purchased him from...Im sure they would want to know if you are going to rehome him. 

I also would rethink getting a smaller dog...they need JUST as much exercise and time spent with them...I remember chatting to someone who owns Newfies AND yorkshire terriers and I always remember him saying the Yorkies can walk the legs off his Newfies any day of the week...


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## Auretrvr (May 6, 2008)

What others have said is very true. I know you meant well, but I think letting this pup go to a loving family is the right thing. Please consider giving him to a rescue group. What money you might get for him won't be much if he is so unruly and as you mentioned, not a puppy. A golden rescue will foster your dog. During that time, they check the temperament. That helps them place the dog in a home that fits it best, and if it doesn't work out, they take it back and search for a home that does match up. They are very careful about who gets a rescue dog and will turn down an inappropriate family. It would be the greatest kindness to your pup to place him with rescue. Go online and see if there is one in your state or area (they will often arrange to come get the dog).


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## Pointgold (Jun 6, 2007)

PLEASE - contact the breeder first before rehoming/selling/putting into rescue. The breeder has a right to know where the puppies she produces are going, and may even have in her sales contract that the dog must come back to her. Any good breeder should be not only willing to, but should insist on this.


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## Ljilly28 (Jan 22, 2008)

I agree with all that's been written. I just want to add the flip side-that if you put lots of wise and caring time into your golden, he can be a calm, intelligent companion who smells good, chews his own appropriate toys, and really connects& comminucates. To me, it is worth hours and hours and hours of training, socializing, play and exercise because the dogs are our best friends and family members- they have a right to be fulfilled and to have their needs met.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Pointgold said:


> PLEASE - contact the breeder first before rehoming/selling/putting into rescue. The breeder has a right to know where the puppies she produces are going, and may even have in her sales contract that the dog must come back to her. Any good breeder should be not only willing to, but should insist on this.


I totally agree with everything pointgold has said. Get in touch with your breeder ASAP!!!!


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## MyBaileyGirl (Jun 11, 2008)

My Bailey is 5 and still VERY hyper. It's just the nature of the dog. One thing that you can do is exercise. Walks, trips to the park, even throwing a ball outside will really help. Bailey usually passes out just after a few walks around the block. As far as everything else, I agree with what Hudson and LibertyME are saying, you can only see results if you put the time into training, grooming, etc. Good luck!!


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## Celeigh (Nov 29, 2007)

LibertyME said:


> You can not control the shedding without being willing to do the work to bathe and groom regularly...
> You can not control the engery without taking the time to exercise...
> You can not control the behavior without taking the time to train...





Pointgold said:


> ...but you are getting out of this poor dog exactly you are putting into it - very little.


I could not say this any better. Dogs - ANY dogs regardless of size - are a commitment and deserve and require attention. And attention doesn't mean petting for a few seconds when you have the time and remembering to feed it. It means attending to its needs constantly, including grooming, training, affection, exercise, and mental stimulation in the form of play.


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## 3kidsandagoldenpuppy (Aug 16, 2008)

I'm new here but I have to say I agree with everyone else. I thoroughly researched dogs, especially the GR and KNEW exactly what breed they are/were and exercise they required before we bought home our puppy. Goldens need a lot of love and exercise. Please do not give your golden up only to get a smaller dog. In my opinion that's saying I don't like the way this child turned out, let's try a different one. Sorry, just my opinion


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## cinnamonteal (May 16, 2008)

In addition to what everyone else has said, please consider getting a cat instead of a small dog. Cats are much more independent, quieter and do not require lots of walks or training. They are still loving and affection creatures and may be what you are looking for. I know a couple who bought a little poodle because they thought they wanted a small dog. But after a couple months of dealing with the usual puppy stuff (housebreaking, chewing, barking, etc.) they rehomed the dog and got a cat instead. They are very happy now with their kitty.

Whatever you choose, please do a lot of research and give your decision careful consideration.


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## jwemt81 (Aug 20, 2008)

All retrievers are very active dogs, especially when they are young. If you do not properly exercise them, they can spin out of control with bad behavior because they have not been taught otherwise. They need to be walked at least a couple of times a day as well as have plenty of room to run around. If you cannot provide this for your golden, I would definitely consider looking for a new family for him who can provide him with the attention and exercise that he needs and wants. You say that it's not fair to the dog, but what really isn't fair is that he is not getting the proper attention and exercise that he needs. He would probably be much happier in a home that can provide this. Also, your dog is not "WACKO." He just has not been properly trained, which is VERY unfair to the dog. I hope you make the right decision. I also agree that you should not go out and get a smaller dog. All dogs require lots of attention and need to be walked regularly, regardless of size or breed, and it sounds like you just don't have the time for a dog right now. Just because a dog is smaller does not mean that it needs any less attention. You really should not have any pets at all right now. I'm sorry, but this kind of story just ticks me off. It's just totally irresponsible to bring a dog, especially a golden, into a situation where he won't get the love and attention that he needs.


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## kwhit (Apr 7, 2008)

"...In addition to what everyone else has said, please consider getting a cat instead of a small dog..."

I disagree. How about NO animals right now? Even though cats are much more independent than dogs, this family does not seem ready for ANY pets, or the added responsibility that comes with them, at this time. I also stand behind Pointgold in contacting the breeder first. It's the absolute right thing to do, for both your dog and his breeder. JMHO.


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## FlyingQuizini (Oct 24, 2006)

The ONLY right thing to do, if you wish to rehome this dog, is contact the breeder and let him/her know. If it truly is a GOOD BREEDER, he will take the dog back. If not, relinquish the dog to your local Golden Retriever Rescue and then DO NOT GET ANOTHER DOG.

You get out of it what you put into it, and you've already said you're too busy. The dog is not WACKO... he's simply untrained. They don't grow out of bad/unwanted behaviors. You have to TEACH good behavior to replace the bad ones.

Perhaps later in your life your situation will change and you'll be able to dedicate the time needed to properly raise, train, socialize and groom the dog of your choice.

Like everyone else said, please contact the breeder. Truly, it's THE ONLY RIGHT THING TO DO. If for any reason the dog can't go back to the breeder, work through rescue so that they can find your dog a permanent home. Frankly, you're not entitled to try and get money back by "selling" this dog just b/c you no longer want it. The priority is finding this dog a home where he can be well cared for for the rest of his life.


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## TheHooch (May 9, 2007)

The breeder of the puppy should be contacted flirst. That is the responsible thing to do and it sounds like it is time to be responsible.


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## GoldenOwner12 (Jun 18, 2008)

I agree with everyone else if your family isn't happy with this dog maybe rehoming him would be best, But please do not get another dog. Golden retrievers are one of the easiest breeds to train. I own a chihuahua as well as 2 golden retrievers and i tell you my chihuahua has just as much energy as my goldens, I also found my chihuahua very difficult to train the only command he knows is sit and come he has very good recall for a chihuahua and can be trusted off lead. It took my chihuahua 1 month to learn the sit command and i was training him everyday for 5 minutes 3 to 4 times a day, Took him another month for the come and recall. I find little dogs harder to train then my goldens. So if you can't handle to train a golden retriever i would say a little dog is way out of your lead. 

Goldens require alot of exercise i walk my 3 dogs everyday for 30 minutes to an hour, Why so little its cause my dogs mainly get off lead runing at the oval or swimming and runing at the river. Cause of this off lead runing they are buggered within 30 minutes. But i then do play with them at home too throw a toy in the backyard. I also brush my guysevery day to every second day. Right now my dogs aren't been exercised casue my 5 month old golden has just been spayed and i feel bad for just taking 2 dogs and leaving her at home. Shelley my 5 month old loves her exercise so you can just image what its like here she is gettting very destructive cause she can't run around and get rid of alll that energy, Would i get rid of her no cause its not her fault. I'm not saying all little dogs are hard to train but they take hell of alot of time and patience as the little ones can be very stubborn. I'm just saying for you it might not work out as you couldn't train your golden which would be in my mind ten times easier to train then a little one.


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## fatnedy&me (Sep 1, 2008)

awww thanks guys .well my mum said that IF we are going to get rid of him , it will be atleast a year , because were heeps busy with everything else . 
uhm this might suprise you ..but i have had a golden before . but we didnt have him as a puppy we got him when he was 3 and i think he was a bit of a kelpie as well . but he was already trained and his hair was shortish .

so being that ive got a year im gonna try heaps hard . like i love bike riding and it nearly spring so ill take him on rides and do at least 10 minutes of training evvery day . so hopefully things will work out , but i know its not gonna be 'just a walk down the street' it gonna be long and hilly 
and if we do decide to get rid of him ill definatley conttact the breeder first , i already knew to do that .
thanks 
x
oh and p.s 
i already have two cats and have had ...4 past dogs 
and ive tooken him to TWO obedience classes and he didnt pass neither .
even though we practised at home .
AND i take him on a walk every day 
marley much 
?


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## avincent52 (Jul 23, 2008)

It seems to me that with a half hour a day you can make a big improvement in this dog.
Play tennis ball fetch for 20 minutes.
Brush him for 10 minutes. 
Spend 30 minutes giving him a bath every 10 days or so. 
Make sure he has appropriate chewy toys and make sure that when he's not supervised he can't get things that he shouldn't be chewing. 

If he "flunked" his obedience class, I'm sure the instructor had some advice. 
Take it or find another one.

And call the breeder and ask for advice. They'll be much happier talking on the phone for a half hour than having a dog needing a new home. 

(You might also try a spell check on your posts. It'd be good practice for all that senior year work and your teachers will thank you.)

best
Allen


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## Phoebe (Feb 8, 2006)

Celeigh said:


> I could not say this any better. Dogs - ANY dogs regardless of size - are a commitment and deserve and require attention. And attention doesn't mean petting for a few seconds when you have the time and remembering to feed it. It means attending to its needs constantly, including grooming, training, affection, exercise, and mental stimulation in the form of play.


Exactly. Having both big and small dogs here, I can't say the small ones are easier...in fact, my Phoebe was incredibly easy to train. No matter what size dog you have, it takes a commitment to training and the ENTIRE family has to be on board because a dog is a life time commitment. If your breeder won't take your dog back, please find a rescue. I had a cairn puppy here last year that had been booted out of four homes in 5 months before surrendering to rescue. I was told she was an out of control, hyper puppy. She was a wonderful little dog, her behavior was appropriate for her age, very trainable. The problem wasn't the dog, the problem was people that did not understand the breed and didn't realize how much effort is involved when training a puppy.

You sound like a great young person who truly cares about your dog and I'm impressed that you have taken the time to ask advise and find a solution.


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## Solas Goldens (Nov 10, 2007)

I agree with what everyone has said. You are getting exactly what you are putting into you golden. I have 3 Goldens under the age of 2, I spend at least 40 minute 2 times a day playing with them in the yard. They are bathed and groomed once a month, by me and taken for long walks. When we can't get out we are in the basement playing ball.If you don't spend the time with your dog he will only get into trouble and do anything he can to get your attention.This comes out in destructive behavior. If you love your dog find a way to spend the time with him playing and training him. He will be the best dog you ever had if you do. If you really can't, find him a loving home, and don't replace him with another dog. The size of the dog doesn't matter, a small dog will need attention as well.I hope everything works out for your dog and you make the best choice possible.


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## TheHooch (May 9, 2007)

avincent52 said:


> It seems to me that with a half hour a day you can make a big improvement in this dog.
> Play tennis ball fetch for 20 minutes.
> Brush him for 10 minutes.
> Spend 30 minutes giving him a bath every 10 days or so.
> ...


Great post.


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## Jackson'sMom (Oct 13, 2007)

My Tia is 7 years old and very full of energy. She goes for a 1-mile walk every morning, then immediately grabs her ball for a game of fetch in the dark. We play ball with her for several minutes several times/day, and she never seems tired, even at her age. Some dogs are just really high-energy. 

Hope the OP will stick around; there's lots of great advice to be had from members of this forum.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Calling and asking the breeder to take back one of their pups only takes a few min. and could have a very big impact on the life of a golden.

I admire your willingness to devote time to your dog but it doesn't sound like your mother has any interest in this. What will happen in a year? You'll be out of school and where does that leave this pup?


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## fatnedy&me (Sep 1, 2008)

uhm no in a year ILL be in senior school for 2 years and yeah . 
gah i just took him on a bike ride and he wouldnt stop sniffing everything and pulling so hard i kept falling over and then he sniffed something and went straight off and i was like "arrrrgghhh" AND THEN he grabbed a used diaper and he wouldnt let go of it . so mad ....and disgusted .:yuck: but ahh well 
doesnt meen i cant try again . 
mmm gotta go homeworking


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## GoldenOwner12 (Jun 18, 2008)

i'm sorry but if this dog is a puller on lead you shouldn't be making him run beside a bike as this is an accident wanting to happen. 

What i surguest you do for 10 minutes 3 times a day is train this dog the sit,lay down,stay and come. First work on the sit command using a treat move the treat above his head and say sit, If he sits give him the treat if he doesn't no treat. Do the sit command for week then move on to lay down. To do the lay down get him in the sit position first then move the treat down then forward while doing this say lay down or drop. If he lays down give treat if doesn't no treat. I've heard of people gently grabing there dogs front legs and moving them forward saying drop or lay down while doing it. Same with sit i've heard of people gently pushing his bottom to make him sit. Work on the drop for a further week then move onto stay. Do not move onto the next command till your dog knows how to do the first very well. Stay is a bit more time working get your dog into sit then say stay move back one step if he goes to follow say No stay then move back another step if he stays move back another step then call him give treat, Each time move further away. Stay could take anwhere from a week to a month to train so keep with it. Remeber every day tell him to sit,drop etc. Come the dog should already know so thats not a problem. Remeber to reward good behaviour and say NO to bad behaviour. Also for this dog i reccomend you start training on lead for the first couple of weeks then slowly start off lead. It might take months for you to train this dog into a well behaved companion. To train not to pull on lead i surguest you get yourself a gentle leader also known as halti, While using this remeber to say heel when the dog returns to your side. This will let the dog know you want him to walk beside you, Once his walking comfortably beside you without pulling remove the gentle leader/halti and use his regular collar. If he goes to pull out infront of you say heel if he doesn't return to your side stop walking till he does. Its going to take alot of time and patience on your part to make this dog into a well behaved well manered dog. It could take months or years. If you don't have this sort of commitment then i surguest you rehome this dog and not get another one.


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## Celeigh (Nov 29, 2007)

I really like Goldenowner12's suggestion for training. Just to add to it, you can take one of your dog's meal's and use the kibble as training treats instead of just putting a bowl down. So for dinner, make him work for it with training. It'll take you some time to get through it all, but you would be amazed at how much he'll learn just with that each day.


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## jwemt81 (Aug 20, 2008)

avincent52 said:


> (You might also try a spell check on your posts. It'd be good practice for all that senior year work and your teachers will thank you.)



I totally agree! Please do this! Not to be rude, but I had a little trouble making sense of your posts.


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## Goldilocks (Jun 3, 2007)

If your breeder is a good breeder he/she should be willing to take the dog back. Usually breeders write into their contracts that if you ever have to give the dog up they are to be contacted first.

I can tell you that I called the breeder Pippa came from looking for a mature puppy or young adult Golden. My brother had adopted an 8 week old pup from her a couple years prior and I knew I could not deal with a puppy. I had to wait for about 6 months to get my adult Golden but the wait was worth it. Call your breeder and if they can't help you call a golden rescue.


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## Tanyac (Jun 18, 2008)

What a sad story! I was just wondering how long you thought about buying a dog before you did it. Has your family owned a dog before? There is no doubt that sometimes people's situations change beyond their control, and they are faced with the heartbreaking decision to give their dogs up. 

Golden Retrievers are the most wonderful dogs ever (just my opinion!) but very often as puppies they are unruly and energetic. This does improve, but if not taught how to have manners, how to walk on the lead properly and the rules in your house, they don't know any better and will continue to behave badly. 

They need time, commitment, regular walks and mental stimulation, otherwise they will be bored and possibly destructive, any dog would be the same, not just GR's.

As for the hair thing, maybe you could get the hoover out a bit more often, I'm sure your mum would appreciate it.

Having a small yard shouldn't be a problem as long as you can take him out twice a day for 35 minutes to an hour each time. Enough exercise will mean your dog is much calmer at home.

I think it's a shame that your family didn't all agree on the dog thing before you decided to purchase one, and would strongly recommend that if you do decide to let your dog go, that your family think long and hard as to whether they have the time and commitment before bringing another into your home.

In making your decision, I would think about what would be best for your dog. In the long run, he might be happier with a family who all love him and want to give him the best life possible.


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## Ash (Sep 11, 2007)

Ditto to what other posters have said. I agree contact the breeder first. There is no magic wand to train and make dogs behave. If you put nothing into it you have nothing to show. It does not just come about over night. Also, if you clean your house and feed and groom you dog properly and you will not have the hair problem. I could take photo of my house where I have 1 Golden (rotate dogs 1 at a time inside) inside all through the day and it looks as though I don't even have a dog. So the hair everywhere I don't really buy. Good luck with your dog. If you want to learn and possibly work to keep your dog you have come to the right place.


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## avincent52 (Jul 23, 2008)

TheHooch said:


> Great post.


Thank you, sir

allen


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