# "Aggressive" behavior towards other dogs



## EmEyl (Jun 22, 2017)

So we have a 2 year old golden retriever named Decker. He is so cute and friendly towards people, however, we didn't socialize him regularly with other dogs and so when he is in close proximity to other dogs, he goes crazy! I mean snarling and growling, and just getting all worked up! We know that he isn't actually aggressive towards other dogs, it's more of a defense "stay away" type of behavior because he's been in contact with other dogs and he does the whole fake bite faux lunge stuff, but he comes off as a very mean dog around others and we aren't sure what to do!! We think he might have a bit of anxiety- he doesn't like when anything is out of the normal; for instance, if there is a car in our neighbors driveway, he goes crazy, if a chair is pushed out too far in the dining room, he cries and is scared it will fall on him, etc. he also puts his head between people's legs (not to sniff or anything) it is a comfort thing, his face always has to be pushed against something, ie. in between our arms, legs, blanket. It's so cute but we are beginning to think of all of these factors, combined with the faux aggressive tendencies towards other dogs as signs of anxiety possibly? We took him to the dog park maybe once or twice a month, but it clearly wasn't enough. We are looking into getting a second dog, a calmer, friendly goldendoodle, to give him a companion and to help him get accustomed to other dogs, and being more comfortable with other pets. Any suggestions on what to do for our dog? thanks!


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## usually lurking (Apr 21, 2017)

I wouldn't advise bringing another dog into your home before you solve your current dog's behavior problem. He isn't going to change his behavior simply because another dog is in your home and you'd be putting the new dog at risk. Goldendoodles aren't going to be calmer. Their personalities are frequently a complete crapshoot, and many of the ones I see have a ton of energy. You need to get a trainer in your home to analyze your dog's behavior and offer advice. If your dog is growling and snarling, he may bite out of fear or aggression. A professional can confirm for you which it is, and/or if he has anxiety, and then help you manage/change his behaviors. Frankly, your dog does not seem to be in your control.

Also, please do not take a dog that snarls/growls/lunges at other dogs to a dog park. That is just asking for trouble.

Edit: Dogs don't "fake" anything. It's one of the beautiful things about them. Whatever his body language is, it needs to be taken seriously.


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## EmEyl (Jun 22, 2017)

Hi there! First of all, thanks for your reply, although I am not sure on the accuracy of most of the points you make. One, I just want to point out that my comment on taking him to the dog park was referring on when he was a puppy, we would take him a few times a month to get him socialized, once we discovered his uneasiness with other dogs, we decided it was best not to take him there anymore. I would never put my dog, or anyone else's dog in a situation like the one you were posing, but thanks for your concern. Second, as I said in my post, he has been in close proximity with other dogs and has not bitten or attempted to bite another pet; yes, he growls and snarls, but does not ever try to attack. Then on to your comment about how dogs never "fake" anything- I think the point you make is valid, sure. But like the old saying goes, "his bark is bigger than his bite," Decker is all talk in regards to his behavior around other dogs. He is fine as long as he has distance or room to move, it is when he feels restricted or confined that he gets uneasy with other dogs. He loves our neighbor dogs- we both have fences, so they don't interact at close proximity to each other. And with the potential second dog, like I said before, we would never put any dog at harm. We have an appointment at the vet to see gauge his level of potential anxiety and see what the best fit for us would be. After his assessment, we would make a more educated decision on what the best step would be for us and Decker. Yes, I agree that he does need a behavior trainer or a more professional assessment on how to behave around other dogs. You seem to know quite a bit about the way to control/train a dog. Do you have any suggestions on behavior trainers in the Cincinnati area? I'd love to hear them!

Thanks


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## usually lurking (Apr 21, 2017)

Thank you for the clarification. Surely, you can understand the concerns given the lack of clarity in your original post. I am nowhere near Cincinnati, so no, I cannot recommend a trainer there, nor would I ever recommend tips for anxious/aggressive/"aggressive"/fearful behaviors over the internet because I can't see your dog or his body language. What I do know, however, is that if your dog is on leash and growling/snarling/lunging at other dogs - and I can only assume that is when he is engaging in this behavior, based on your two prior posts- then he is not under control. If your dog was under control, you'd be able to put him in a sit and he'd sit politely for you, regardless of circumstance. On leash, off leash, confined or not, it should not matter. Have you tried anything to curb his "aggressive" behavior towards other dogs? If so, what?

I'm sure you could google trainers in your area, or perhaps there are other members on the board in your general vicinity.

Edit: I should add that my current pup is timid. He used to engage in fearful barking towards other dogs. Consistent training has raised his confidence level, lowered his timidity, and he will sit politely and calmly when another dog approaches. I have also had, in the past, a dog (not a Golden) that was aggressive and required constant management and training, such that I knew he would respond to me under all circumstances. However, due to his aggression, I never allowed him off leash, except under controlled circumstances. He was bulletproof on leash and off, when allowed.


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## G-bear (Oct 6, 2015)

I would suggest contacting the local chapter of Golden Retriever Club of America (GRCA) to help you locate a behaviorist/trainer in your area. There is a chapter in Cincinnati. Their website is: Contacts -
While I understand that you believe that your dog is "all bark and no bite" you should be aware that a dog growling, barring his teeth and barking at another dog or human is a warning issued by the dog. For more information on understanding dog behavior I would recommend you read the book, "The Other End of the Leash" by Patricia McConnell, Ph.D. in addition to the help of an animal behaviorist and a trainer the book will help you a great deal in understanding and dealing with your dog's behavior.


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## puddles everywhere (May 13, 2016)

Simply a guess as I haven't seen the dog or the behavior but having a dog with some anxiety it sounds like this poor pup is terrified and reacts this way out of fear. You can defend all you want but reality is fearful dogs are the ones most likely to bite. All dogs have a flight or fight default and if they are backed into a corner... rather real or imagined, they will defend themselves.

Being an old fart, life has taught me that putting the "good" kid with the "problem" kid rarely works out. The so called calm and well behaved dog usually picks up on the bad stuff and then you will have two with this behavior.

I realize every pup has their own personalities but remember that your dogs behavior is learned so until you figure out what made him this way you are doomed to repeat the process with a 2nd dog. 

Find a good trainer and help your poor dog learn how to cope with his surroundings. That has to be a terrible way to live.


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## alphadude (Jan 15, 2010)

puddles everywhere said:


> Simply a guess as I haven't seen the dog or the behavior but having a dog with some anxiety it sounds like this poor pup is terrified and reacts this way out of fear. You can defend all you want but reality is fearful dogs are the ones most likely to bite. All dogs have a flight or fight default and if they are backed into a corner... rather real or imagined, they will defend themselves.


My thoughts exactly. Sounds link a classic case of fear aggression.


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## Charliethree (Jul 18, 2010)

Emylee Eyler said:


> So we have a 2 year old golden retriever named Decker. He is so cute and friendly towards people, however, we didn't socialize him regularly with other dogs and so when he is in close proximity to other dogs, he goes crazy! I mean snarling and growling, and just getting all worked up! We know that he isn't actually aggressive towards other dogs, it's more of a defense "stay away" type of behavior because he's been in contact with other dogs and he does the whole fake bite faux lunge stuff, but he comes off as a very mean dog around others and we aren't sure what to do!! We think he might have a bit of anxiety- he doesn't like when anything is out of the normal; for instance, if there is a car in our neighbors driveway, he goes crazy, if a chair is pushed out too far in the dining room, he cries and is scared it will fall on him, etc. he also puts his head between people's legs (not to sniff or anything) it is a comfort thing, his face always has to be pushed against something, ie. in between our arms, legs, blanket. It's so cute but we are beginning to think of all of these factors, combined with the faux aggressive tendencies towards other dogs as signs of anxiety possibly? We took him to the dog park maybe once or twice a month, but it clearly wasn't enough. We are looking into getting a second dog, a calmer, friendly goldendoodle, to give him a companion and to help him get accustomed to other dogs, and being more comfortable with other pets. Any suggestions on what to do for our dog? thanks!



Suggest getting the book: On Talking Terms with Dogs, by Turid Rugaas, to help you understand what he is 'saying' what his body language telling you. Having a basic understanding of dog body language, signals that they display can help you to avoid putting your pup in situations that he is not feeling safe in. 

The Fearfuldogs.com website may be helpful to you, providing some insight and ways to help your dog. 

Please understand that your dog is afraid, and sooner or later, in the wrong situation, where he is feeling trapped, whether cornered or on leash, unable to escape, he may feel he has no choice but to fight or bite (in self defense) in order to make the threat go away, risking injuring another dog or person. Once he gathers the courage to defend himself physically, he has another 'tool' in his 'tool box' and is more likely to do it again, because it has worked to make the threat go away. His displays of 'inappropriate' behavior (barking, lunging) from our perspective are intended to create space, keep himself safe, it is in his best interests that you help him, encourage him to move away to a safe (for him) distance. 

At home work on confidence building skills, rehearsing and rewarding (reinforcing) cues he already knows, teaching him tricks, easy, fun things for him to do, teaching him to make eye contact with you on request, shake a paw, 'touch' his nose to the palm of your hand (once he is reliable with the touch cue, you use the cue to help him focus and redirect, my anxious girl uses/offers the 'touch' to tell me when she is feeling uncomfortable in some situations) spin, weave through your legs, for example. Walk him in areas, and at time when you are less likely to encounter other dogs, rehearse and reward those 'basic' skills, sit, down, stay, even some simple tricks on walks, to help build his confidence out in the real world. 

I wish you well with your pup, he needs your help to build his confidence, to feel safe in the world. His fears are real to him, he is depending on you to help him over come them.


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## usually lurking (Apr 21, 2017)

Just to add to the previous points, regardless of the reason for your dog's behavior, the worst thing you can do is inadvertently reinforce or reward it. A trainer can help you not only find the source of the aggression - his triggers - but make sure that you aren't doing anything to encourage him. I don't know what your reaction is to his growling/snarling/lunging, but if you freak out and start yanking on the leash, that will only make him act out more. If you start yelling, that will make it worse. Those are obvious examples, but it could also be something very subtle that you are doing, like taking a step back as a dog approaches and leaving your dog between you and the oncoming one. If you have a naturally timid dog, you essentially just abandoned him to fend for himself. A good trainer can help you increase your dog's confidence that you have control of every situation, so that he doesn't have to worry.


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## EmEyl (Jun 22, 2017)

Wow thank you all so much! Your advice and input really helps us to give the best help to Decker! I do not mean to defend my dog for doing bad behavior or pretending that he is harmless because I know that dogs can act out of aggression and cause harm without necessarily meaning to! It has not gotten that far yet, and that is why I am seeking your help for how to prevent/handle this. I am merely just trying to explain that he isn't a bad dog, or a typically aggressive dog, he just hasn't been trained or socialized on how or what to do when these instances come up. I feel terribly bad for Decker when he is so frightened he has to resort to these behaviors, but I would like to say that this doesn't happen often and he isn't living a terrible life- he is played with constantly, taken on long walks/hikes daily, loved uncontrollably, very well cared for, and generally just likes being with people more than dogs- that's how it's been from the start, even as a puppy, at the dog park, he stayed with us mostly, and shying away from other pups wanting to play. I do think that he is missing out on playing with other dogs, and that is why we are trying to figure out the best route to take to make him feel more at ease! We just want him to be comfortable, happy, and well behaved and all of your comments are helping so much! We have contacted a trainer that will be coming to our house to help with these issues! I apologize if I took these comments to heart too much, I know you are just trying to help, I just wanted to clarify our lifestyle and Decker's personality! He's a very happy and friendly dog that just has problems with safety and other dogs! If I ever felt like a dog was living a terrible life under our care, it would break my heart and I would not stand for it. I hope you all understand where I am coming from  if any of you have any more suggestions, I would love to hear them!


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## G-bear (Oct 6, 2015)

I just want to tell you that there is hope in dealing with Decker's fear and agressive issues. About 3 1/2 years ago I adopted a dog who was considereal "unadoptable" because of all of his "issues". While he is not a golden retriever Jack was dog reactive, human reactive, had food guarding issues and was deathly afraid of loud noises. As many here know he had been badly abused prior to his arrival in foster care and was deemed "unadoptable" after a failed adoption attempt where he killed the adoptive family's cat. So, we went went into Jack's adoption with our eyes wide open to his problems. We also went into it already having two other dogs in our home, a golden and a golden mix. Both of them therapy dogs who were incredibly well trained. 
It am not going to tell you some fairy tale about how seemlessly Jack's problems resolved. That was not the case. It has taken 3 years of hard work, both with a behaviorist and training with his family but Jack has come miles and miles. A huge break through occurred last winter when our golden (who we got as a puppy after our senior golden died of cancer 2 years ago) taught Jack to play. For most dogs this is normal behavior. For Jack it was a milestone. Since then he and Bailey have become best buddy's. They are always together and now both of them create mischief and mayhem in my home and I couldn't be happier about it. 
My point is that Decker's issues with fear and agressive can be dealt with. You can't do it alone and you have very wisely taken the first step in hiring a trainer. It will take time but it will be worth every dollar spent and every single moment spent training. We will be here on GRF for advice and a sounding board. I want to say thank you for dealing with this. Some people would not bother and the results could be...bad. You have been proactive and I applaud and thank you for that. Good luck!
PS Jack is the noble looking coonhound in my signature photo.


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## Wenderwoman (Jan 7, 2013)

You can definitely get your dog into classes. There are plenty of trainers that work with reactive dogs. In fact, the trainer will be a much better judge as to how aggressive your dog really is. I have two rescue dogs and one raised from a puppy. The two rescues are a little more reactive but it has never stopped me from getting new dogs. When you bring a dog into your pack, it is different than meeting dogs outside the boundaries of their space. My two rescues had to get used to other dogs and cats as well. My dogs aren't that comfortable with other dogs at first either. They will bark and lunge but rarely attack and I have to approach slowly, if I do at all.

Anyway, the point is that you need to get them in training. Once they are in training, you can decide if it will be too much work to get them to be friendly with other dogs or not. It might just be that you just don't interact with other dogs and that's just fine really. And, that doesn't mean you can't get another dog because like I said, it's different when you bring them into a home or pack than meeting outside where they may be more inclined to guard themselves or their territory.

Also, while dogs can influence each other, they likely won't fix anything really ingrained in them. My alpha girl will correct them and has certainly toned down a lot of their "rescue" issues but some of them persist and that takes a lot of training and sometimes, just aging and settling down before they are corrected.


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## puddles everywhere (May 13, 2016)

Please don't take our opinions personally... as a group we have dealt with lots of dogs with many personalities and sharing what we have seen. You mentioned several behaviors that support that your dog has some issues with fear and this should be addressed  

I do suggest strongly that you find a trainer or training facility (not a Petsmart) that can help you. Our dogs are a giant reflections on what they pick up from us. Finding someone to help you figure out what you are doing that causes him to feel unsafe is important for his well being. And certainly necessary to avoid creating the same behavior in a 2nd dog.

Just like people there are introverts and extroverts. You may feel like he is missing out on "doggie" company but could be this is just not his comfort level. This may be something you desire more than he does. Group activities can be very overwhelming for many dogs and some just prefer the company of people... but usually this is a choice not because they are fearful.

You have nothing to loose by working with a trainer and everything to gain.


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## Anele (Dec 12, 2014)

Others have given you such wise advice, so I will just add...

I suggest you remove language such as him being "bad" or thinking that you, as the owner, have failed him in some way. The truth is, genetics play a huge part and this is why he is the way he is. No one here is judging you or your dog.

Since he has such pronounced dog aggression/anxiety, I would recommend you tell his breeder so that he/she can determine if this is a fluke or a pattern showing up in certain lines.

I would try to identify what your ultimate goals are with him and then take baby steps with the help of a pro, as you are doing, to get there. Goldens are one of the few exceptional breeds in that they are welcoming of strange dogs, but there is no guarantee that a golden will always be this way, as you have discovered. But on the whole, most dog breeds tend to be more protective of their space. This is a new culture and mindset we have nowadays of thinking, "All dogs should get along," and we bring them to dog parks, pet stores, etc. often with the purpose of meeting new dogs... whereas most dogs would rather stick with dogs they know and trust and keep a small circle of familiarity around them. 

And while the dog aggression is important, I think it would be wonderful if the whole anxiety puzzle were looked at as a whole. It sounds like you have identified many key behaviors and triggers for him so be sure to share it all with the trainer. I suspect that as his overall anxiety decreases it will only help with his reactivity towards other dogs.


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## Yaichi's Mom (Jul 21, 2012)

EmEyl, I truly feel for you.

I have a very good friend whom I met when Brisby was a puppy...they are the same age within weeks.

We actually met at a dog park and we were very fortunate as the park we met at, at a certain time were all owners with puppies, many GRs and they had wonderful play dates for almost a year with little incident. That said, my friends GR male pup showed limited aggressive behaviour and what one could deem was "dominance" from about 6 months. Now I know that many will say there is no such thing as "dominance", however I am not sold on this from what I have seen.

The above aside, my friends GR is "selectively reactive". He does not lunge, jump or bark at others dogs, however he will unpredictably attack some dogs who get too close to him....even dogs he has met before, seemed ok with and then something just happened and he gets into a "red zone".

You have been given some wonderful advice in this thread above. Read, get a good behaviorist if you are able and willing to do so and work with your boy. 

Above all else as others have written, PLEASE do not think that getting another dog, specifically a "golden doodle" will help or solve this issue. 

Brisby and I have been at dog parks and walked off leash for 5 years. We have seen many dogs, many things, many interactions.

There is no such thing as a "laid back" "Golden Doodle" from what I have seen and we have seen many. They are hyper, jumpy, nippy, like to play on the rough side and don't like to give up...atleast from what I have seen.

My best suggestion to you with all best wishes is to work with your pup and help him be the best he can be.

Not all dogs are good with other dogs even if we want them to be. It is a difficult thing to accept I know...my friend with her reactive GR is heart broken that she is not able to go and do what she would like to do with her dog, however she is accepting his limitations.

As a last comment, it is really sad to see that there seems to be a change in this breed with more reactivity. This certainly not what the GR breed has always been exemplary of relative to a friendly, passive positive nature...makes me wonder ...

Best of luck with your boy.


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