# It hurts so much



## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

My 13.8 year old golden is gone. We decided to put her down after we found that she had bone cancer and a complete fracture in her front leg. She had been limping for ten days and was hoping it was arthritis flaring up. She has been on rimadyl for 2 years and I believe this extended her life with much quality. The only option was to amputate the leg although we believe she was not strong enough for her remaining 3 legs to support her 68 lb body. 

I am heat broken; sick with grief. The pain is extreme at times. This is my second morning without her. I pass thru each room looking at her stuffed animals where she placed them last. One penguin stuffy she had since she was our 4 month old baby is placed by the tomato bush when she plucked her last ripe tomato staying clear of the tomato leaves (leaves are toxic to dogs).

She was such a sweetie with a one of a kind personality. I try to talk myself into that she had a very long beautiful life with a family that loved her so--lucky her as I know for so many dogs life ends too early. I hope this pain passes soon although I know it will never fully go away.


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## 2golddogs (Oct 19, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. I also had lost our last golden at 13.8 years. Though we were so blessed to have him over 13 years, it is still heartbreaking when it is their time to leave us.


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## oakleysmommy (Feb 20, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss, she sounds like she was just a sweetheart. i hope the coming days get alittle easier for you and your sadness turns to smiles of what a great life she had with you.


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Welcome to the Forum. You will find a lot of support here.

We also lost a beloved Golden this week and share the pain you're going through. I find some comfort in this piece by American playwright Eugene O'Neill: The Last Will and Testament of Silverdene Emblem O'Neill. An important passage reads, "I ask my Master and Mistress to remember me always, but not to grieve for me too long. In my life I have tried to be a comfort to them in time of sorrow, and a reason for added joy in their happiness. It is painful for me to think that even in death I should cause them pain. Let them remember that while no dog has ever had a happier life (and this I owe to their love and care for me), now that I have grown blind and deaf and lame, and even my sense of smell fails me so that a rabbit could be right under my nose and I might not know, my pride has sunk to a sick, bewildered humiliation. I feel life is taunting me with having over-lingered my welcome. It is time I said good-bye, before I become too sick a burden on myself and on those who love me. It will be sorrow to leave them, but not a sorrow to die. Dogs do not fear death as men do. We accept it as part of life, not as something alien and terrible which destroys life. What may come after death, who knows? I would like to believe ... there is a Paradise where one is always young and full-bladdered; where all the day one dillies and dallies with an amorous multitude of houris, beautifully spotted; where jack rabbits that run fast but not too fast (like the houris) are as the sands of the desert; where each blissful hour is mealtime; where in long evenings there are a million fireplaces with logs forever burning, and one curls oneself up and blinks into the flames and nods and dreams, remembering the old brave days on earth, and the love of one's Master and Mistress."

Much as we hurt now, our sweet dogs are free of pain at last.

Wishing you peace and heart's ease.


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## ELI&BAILEY'S MOM (Dec 18, 2008)

I am so, so sorry for your loss. Godspeed.


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## Florabora22 (Nov 30, 2008)

I can really feel the pain in your words and my heart aches for you.  It's so hard to lose a friend after almost 14 years. My thoughts are with you.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

I am so very sorry for your loss. Our Selka had bone cancer in his shoulder and we chose not to amputate for the same reasons. He has been in Heaven since last Sept.9 and I miss him every day.It is so painful and sad to say Goodbye. God bless you.


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## Laurie (Sep 20, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss. Please share some pictures of your girl when you are ready.

RIP sweet girl.


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## PrincessDi (Jun 8, 2009)

So very sorry for your loss of your sweet girl. It is overwhelmingly painful to loose them. I can tell that you gave your girl a life filled with love and lover her so much , that you set her free from her pain at the cost of your own. My heart breaks for you at this difficult time.


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## daisydogmom (Feb 26, 2007)

I am so sorry for your loss.


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## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

*Gigi girl, my baby*

RIP with your family and all your new friends my love.....

10-25-1997 - 7-2-2011
Gigi Girl


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## Dallas Gold (Dec 22, 2007)

I'm very sorry for your loss of your sweet girl. 13 years 8 months with her is a blessing, but it's always too short because we love them so much. I hope you will find peace and comfort in the happy memories you created during her life.


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## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

*Thank you all for all the kind words*

Finding this site is a blessing.


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Gigi girl said:


> Finding this site is a blessing.


That's oh so true!


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## goldensrbest (Dec 20, 2007)

I know it hurts sooo much, the absence of them, is very tough, but she is free of pain, bone cancer is horrible, i lost a almost 10 yr old, red also, a few years ago to this, she to, just broke her leg, we did not even know she had this, the pain they can take, i can not imagine.


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## vcm5 (Apr 20, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss. My heart goes out to you.


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## Duke's Momma (Mar 1, 2007)

I'm so sorry for your loss. I love her picture next to the water. golden's always look so happy in or near the water. Her and my angel boy, Duke are swimming together right now along with all the other water babies. Just the thought of our two beautiful red goldens having fun together is bringing tears to my eyes. It's been almost a year and 1/2 when we said goodbye and sometimes it still feels like just moments ago. Lymphoma took his life - **** cancer!


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## caseypooh (Dec 30, 2010)

..I am so sorry, I wish I could blink and make everything easier for all of us. Your baby was beautiful and so very happy, you can see it in her face. It will be 7 months for us this week since losing our Casey. She was almost 13 and the love of my life.


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## iansgran (May 29, 2010)

A little more than a year ago we went through the same. It will get better but it will take time. Jaro has helped a lot. At first I said no more dogs, we are too old. But then we got Jaro.


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## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

*Thanksgiving Memory*

Gigi could always be found under our rod iron table for our entire Thanksgiving dinner...I do know she really wanted to be on the top of the table but she was a graceful lady with manners and got creative with her spot under the table instead. I MISS YOU GIRL....


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## goldensmum (Oct 23, 2007)

So sorry for your loss - they leave such a hole in our lives when they leave, but they are forever buried deeply in our hearts

Sleep softly Gigi


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## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

*Gigi girl's son vinny*

Vinny is going on 13 this year and was her first born out of 8 pups (teenage pregnancy for GIGI as she escaped from our yard and mated with the lab across the street)

He is seemingly depressed now as she was his soul mommy mate his entire life. 

Want to get a pup for the two of us, but now sure that is the right thing to do.


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## ggdenny (Nov 2, 2008)

I am so very sorry for your loss. I know the agony you're going through and all I can say is that it takes to time. Please know that everyone here is thinking about you. When you feel up to it please post some pictures of your wonderful girl.


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## timberwolf (Apr 1, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss.
You are in my heart and prayers.
Play hard at the bridge sweet girl!


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## Sally's Mom (Sep 20, 2010)

It is so hard to lose a golden friend. The pain runs so deep. I lost my third golden eleven days ago, and it doesn't get any easier... You will miss her every part of every day for a long time. That photo of her running in the water is perfect. Her son Vinny is quite handsome, so you still have her legacy. Just remember she is no longer in pain and you made the best decision for her. All of my best wishes.


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## k9mom (Apr 23, 2009)

I write this with tears running down my cheek. I'm so sorry for your loss. I read and reread The last will and testament of a dog on face book, it's a beautiful peice.


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## outabout (Apr 10, 2011)

I am so sorry. I lost my Whiskey a little more than a month ago at the age 12 years 8 months. Its just like losing a family member of 12 years. The pain was unbearable. Even today I am slowly putting back the furniture that I re-arranged to accommodate his illness before his passing, everything reminds me of him.
But it does get better. Focusing on something, like writing her life story or memorial, will help. Hope you feel better.


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## PrincessDi (Jun 8, 2009)

What a beautiful sweet girl, your Gigi was. I know that her son, Vinny will be mourning her loss as well. Try to love him up as much as possible. When we sent our Di to the bridge, we thought we were going to loose our 13 3/4 yrs old Max as well. Six weeks later he is just now starting to eat some and wag his tail more. Will keep you and Vinny in our thoughts and prayers.


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## spruce (Mar 13, 2008)

seeing the title of this thread brings home the agony so many of us have felt, & hearts are breaking for you. 

my personal, limited-experienced opinion is that Vinny may like a young dog (past teething!). I know my guys are "herd animals' & need their companion. 
Note: Vinny (Vincent) is currently my top name for imaginary next dog


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## Nath (May 12, 2011)

So sorry for you lost. We are all here to help you along the way.


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I am so very very sorry for the loss of your sweet beautiful girl. My heart goes out to you, it's devastating to have to say goodbye to them because a big piece of your heart goes with them.

You gave her a wonderful life, in return she gave you so much joy and love, filled your life with special times and memories-reflect on those. In time your pain will ease and you will be able to smile when you think of her. You gave her the best gift you could possibly give her by letting her go peacefully so she would no longer be in pain.

Play hard, run free, sleep softly sweet beautiful girl.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*GiGi Girl*

I am so very sorry for your loss! I love the name GiGi!!


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## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

Lost my vinny boy 3 months later on Gigi's b-day. Vinny just wanted to be with his mommy and gave her a special spritual b-day geeeting. I miss my babies so much although it warms my heart that mother and son are together. Until we meet someday my sweeties!

http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com/attachment.php?attachmentid=99036&d=1309806497


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*GiGi Girl*

GiGi Girl

I am SO VERY SORRY FOR YOUR loss of Vinny & GiGi!! 
Please stay here for comfort and support!
Now GiGi and Vinny are together!


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I'm so sorry to hear Vinny is gone, my thoughts are with you.


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## oakleysmommy (Feb 20, 2011)

So sorry, i sometimes have a difficult time reading these sort of posts. again very sorry


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## twinny41 (Feb 13, 2008)

Yep, the pain can be extreme. Tis the price we pay and would we trade any of those years to not feel this pain? I think not. So sorry for your loss.


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## frameart (Apr 17, 2012)

I'm so sorry for your loss, I know how unbearable the pain is.


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## HolDaisy (Jan 10, 2012)

So sorry for you loss of Gigi and Vinny. So sad reading your story


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## vcm5 (Apr 20, 2011)

I am so sorry for your loss!


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## Gigi girl (Jul 4, 2011)

*New Doggie After My 2 Babies*

After having split feelings about getting a new doggie after our loss of our 2 sweeties, we did get a rescue named Dexter. I made me smile to think of helping a needy doggie so I kept on looking at dogs needing homes on the internet and found Mr. Dex. 

Dexter was born on 7-21-10 and is a AKC English White Labrador Retriever. His previous owner kept him outdoors without much human contact. The inside of a home was like a new discover for him which spooked him in the beginning. He has adapted so well and is very happy. He creates lots a laughter in our home as he is a lover and a player with us. He knows how to get our attention in funny ways (and sometimes annoying ways). We now have a new baby and we love him so.

To sum it up on if it was the right decision to get another dog so soon. Well yes I believe I made the right choice. Dexter will never replace my Gigi and Vinny of course (below on the beach together not much before they left to rainbow bridge). My love for Dex is so very different and do believe somehow Gi and Vin sent him my way to use as my guiding light back on track heading toward wellness after my big loss last year. I am doing better and time does help along with my Dex at my side...together we will keep eachother on track...

Forever in my heart...my babies in heaven.


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## Pointgold (Jun 6, 2007)

I understand your heartache all too well. You gave her the greatest gift of love by releasing her from her pain. She knows how well loved she is.


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## Claire's Friend (Feb 26, 2007)

Thank you for sharing your story. Your babies are beautiful !!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Mr. Dex*

God Bless you for adopting Mr. Dex-he will keep you on the right track and I have no doubt that GiGi and Vinny sent him to you!!
Dexter is a VERY HANDSOME BOY!!


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## *Laura* (Dec 13, 2011)

I'm so glad you adopted Mr Dex. Gigi and Vinnie would be so happy to see a smile on your face again.


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## mybuddy (Mar 2, 2007)

I am so sorry for your loss 

Hugs


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## jealous1 (Dec 7, 2007)

I am so sorry for your loss. I am sure both would approve of Dexter and are smiling down on y'all. I think the greatest tribute we can pay to those we have lost are passing along the love they gave us by saving another.


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## Wagners Mom2 (Mar 20, 2012)

Dexter is gorgeous. So glad your angels sent you a precious boy to help your heart heal. (((HUGS))).


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## Buddy's mom forever (Jun 23, 2011)

I am very sorry for your loss of Gigi and Vinny. I can’t believe I never responded to this thread as I remember I read it before. I am glad you found the way to heal, getting a new dog to love and cherish in memory of those you have lost.
Your two babies want you to be happy, as they loved you so much. You will never forget them, they will stay in your heart forever. Love for them just made a new spot for Dexter.


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