# Male vs. Female Golden Retrievers



## GOAussies (Dec 3, 2021)

Do you have a gender preference? Which do you prefer and why? What are the pros and cons to male and female goldens in terms of temperament and health?

My cousin has lived with enough dogs of various breeds to decide that she prefers male dogs to female dogs. She doesn't own goldens, but she owns 2 Labradors, so the dogs are similar.

Thanks for your input!


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

Bumping up


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## JerseyChris (10 mo ago)

Male dogs don't come into season twice a year..  I have not had a female Golden but it seems the general consensus is Males are typically more loving and females tend to be a bit more independent.


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## ashley0805 (Oct 15, 2021)

I agree with JerseyChris. I read somewhere that female Goldens love you, but male Goldens are in love with you (more affectionate). My only golden was a male; when I'm ready, I would love to have another.


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## Sankari (12 mo ago)

First dog for me unlike my husband.. so very little experience to talk about the other points.. I wanted a male golden and my husband (the Frenchman) wanted a female. In France, most people say female dogs are gentler and better with kids than the male ones so that's why he wanted a female. I personally wanted a boy just because I love the more luxurious coat a male golden has... - My breeder paired us with the "curious" male puppy and he's still the same to this day 😊

I guess also I don't have to deal with heat issues since I got a male.. I had a horrific hand injury last year and Ramses was very caring and gentle as a then 8 month old.. He was then impromptu utilized for physical therapy to help me about a year ago.. I think he's got very good attention span to learn tasks. 3 of his siblings (2 females, 1 male) have graduated from guide dog school recently and will be working with the blind so I guess that would speak to maybe temperament? - Females are as good in this aspect also...


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## nolefan (Nov 6, 2009)

As I sit here with my coffee, my velcro girl is plastered to me. I grew up with dogs, always boys and that's what I stuck with for years. Then I ended up with a girl puppy this time and she is my whole heart. She's 9 now. With Goldens you get out what you put in. Plan to spend the first few years taking obedience classes and playing games and devoting as much free time as you have to working with your Golden and you will have an amazing relationship with that dog regardless of sex.


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## cwag (Apr 25, 2017)

I have had two females and now a male. Both my girls were very affectionate. I guess I like that they are a little more independent. Rukie is sweet and he's a very good dog. We love him like crazy, but he is more stubborn and less cooperative about grooming than the girls. He has growled at me many times and the girls never did. We plan to get a girl next time. I also think that the girls were a little less rambunctious and, of course, smaller. They mature faster too. But every dog is so different that generalizations don't always apply.


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## zinnia (7 mo ago)

I have a soft spot for the girls. I’ve had three goldens: male, female, female. The most physically affectionate of the three is my current girl who thinks she is a lap dog and requires a minimum of two hours of rubbing and petting per day. I really think it comes down to personality more than gender. Our boy was sweet and affectionate, but also sulky at times and very stubborn. Males are usually larger, but ours was the smallest of the three. Our first girl was not so physically affectionate, but was extremely loving in a more playful kind of way. She was in love with our boy and I was in love with her.


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## FurdogDad (Mar 30, 2021)

We've had 4 boys and 1 girl. The boys have all been very affectionate, playful and silly. We've had one of each for the past 8 yrs. Lola can be playful and silly at times, but tends to be a bit more reserved. I think individual personality comes into play as much or more than gender. If we were to get another down the road, I would prefer another boy but would definitely consider a girl depending on the situation.


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## sam34 (9 mo ago)

I don't think it matters. I think the differences people note and what we've seen in our own dogs is just individual temperament differences not related to sex of the animal. In our case, sample size is way too small to make any generalizations (3 males, 3 females). 

I can say we chose a female pup this time as we wanted the lower end of the size scale as she'll spend a lot of time on a boat, sailing with us. All our other dogs were neutered, this one likely not so there will be the heat cycles to deal with. 2 of the 3 neutered males we had just loved to meticulously lick their penises...ok maybe a little gross, but it is what it is. That's all I've got.


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## FUReverGolden (Nov 24, 2021)

I have heard a quote a very long time ago, do not know the origin : " If you are sitting on the sofa and leave the room, the male will follow you as the female will take your place on the sofa" 😂 In my life I've had both male and females dogs both were just as smart and sweet. However as an adult I have only had Male Goldens, Possibly because I have male human children also? 🤷‍♀️


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## Cjm (Oct 26, 2018)

We have always had one of each. Both are affectionate and sweet, but the girls are THE boss when you have two. I used to think it was sad that they called female dogs the 'b' word. But I have since realized the 'b' word started with female dogs and their attitude sometimes and then that term was applied to humans.


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## DevWind (Nov 7, 2016)

My girl is confident, independent, and wicked smart. She is affectionate but it’s a quick I love you and she’s off again. My boy is confident and smart too but not like her. It’s in a different way than her. He’s very snuggly and would live in my face if he could. 🙂


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## Emmdenn (Jun 5, 2018)

I have one male and two females. It's totally dog dependent. My male is not nearly as affectionate as my females. He likes his space, doing his own thing and wants to be near you and likes attention but he's never overly affectionate or loving. My females on the other hand want to be as close to me as possible. My older female sleeps under my chair while I work, she follows me around and sleeps curled at my legs all night. The younger female loves to literally crawl in my lap if I'm sitting down and rest her head under my chin.

Training wise my girls are MUCH quicker to pick up on things and easier to train. They do get bored more easily though. The male was relatively easy to train too but things with him take way more practice and repetition and he also has a tendency to naturally be more vigilant about his surroundings, wants to be sniffing scents and exploring the perimeter or checking out other dogs whereas the girls can focus on me.

I believe it really depends on the dog, the pedigree, its temperament, how it was raised and trained etc. Don't fall for the stereotypes about the different genders. Heat cycles BTW-really not difficult to manage at all.


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## SRW (Dec 21, 2018)

Like most people, I have only a very small sample to judge from personal experience. 
Right now it is Lily that has to be right next to me on the couch in the evening. Jake finds one of his favorite spots on the floor or sometimes Lily's side of the crate. He checks in occasionally to be petted. 
Interestingly, in the holding blind prior to running at a trial or in training; Jake wants to be petted and puts his paws on me.
Lily doesn't want any attention at all, she just wants to get to the line.

Among field trial people, most will tell you that females mature quicker and tend to be a little more tractable and complacent. They will also tell you they can be moody. 
I know that when good field trial bitches are on their game they are tough to beat.


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## Megora (Jun 7, 2010)

Using your post as an excuse to share sweetness from my two. 


The first shows my two intact boys digging in and eating my leftovers (eggs and steak) from the other day. Typically the younger dog knows his brother will eat the whole thing if you let him, and would normally pick up the dish or bowl I put down and carry it away to eat in his own space (after leaving a trail of food for his brother). On this day, the smell of steak and eggs basically meant there was no time for all that and the dogs just dug in eating as much as they could and as fast as they could. No quarrels or ugly looks for each other - just literally resembling (to my eyes anyway) the simplicity of pups digging in and eating their meals together.  

The other pic shows them hanging out and playing in the pool this past weekend. The dogs do have different temperaments and approaches to everything.... Jovi (the older boy on the right) tends to be a smidge more universal in his affections. Meaning, that there's various people out there besides myself who he loves with all his heart. Even while he is still gently loyal to me. He is more thoughtful and deliberate when he is being very good. Literally the type of dog who doesn't just do what you ask, but you can see him literally going, "Oh, she wants me to do this because X". He is the one who has spoiled more than one conformation classes for winning over other dogs, because he's next to me doing his heads up heeling strut because that's his favorite and normally wins happiness in my face when I look down at him. <B

Glee is more like his dad. He is super affectionate and needy - and more focused only on me. If the boys are out running in the woods and I call them - Glee is normally the one who comes flying back immediately. He is the one who if I'm sitting down, is lying with his back under my feet or if he can, climbing up in my lap to go to sleep there. He is the one who as a puppy, I couldn't resist him when I saw him literally ninja climbing out of the puppy pen to get to me so I would keep holding him. He had his first obedience Q this past weekend and made me smile to see that while he thought he was doing conformation and forged ahead of me the entire time. He only lost points on forging. There were no points lost elsewhere in his run. The funny thing to me was that it was not like he's as deliberate or intelligent about it like his brother. He was more, "I'm here, I'm here, I'm here, I need your approval and LOVE ME...." 🤣

What does the above have to do with your question??????

Just simply me sharing hat I love about boy dogs. I find they are bigger, better, gorgeous-er, hairier, sweeter, and just everything more wonderful than anything else. 

Unlike girlies - it may take a boy dog 3-4 years to mentally mature and grow up out of the baby puppy dog that LOVES THE WORLD AND FORGOT EVERYTHING BECAUSE FRIENDS ARE HERE stage of being. 

Sometimes it also takes 3-4 years for them to physically mature. With my two boys - Jovi was filling out by age 2. His brother took more after his dad and is only just now really filling out. 

Girlies - have seen friends with girl puppies who are mentally mature by 5-6 months old. And sometimes with girlies, there does not seem to be as great a difference between them at 6-9 months and them again at 2-3 years old. 

The negative I can think of from a completely unreliable personal observation that I have generalized (probably am completely wrong) is that with girlies is they can be more witchy with their pack. Not in an aggressive way, but they are quicker to put other dogs in their place because it seems like they know they are queen.  

If you are trying to decide what to get and why and whatnot - I probably would suggest starting out with a boy. The big overwhelming positive is that they do not go into season and generally with this breed, they do not typically get overwhelming with the hormones and interacting with other dogs, assuming you have kept multiple dogs while they grew up. I had up to 3 boys a year+ ago, and generally speaking, they were a dog pack. You had the dad who obviously had his favorite son who he never gave the LOOK to (never growled or showed his teeth, just had this way of moving crazy fast and staring down a troublemaker). Glee was the favorite son - probably because he was always one step behind his dad anywhere and everywhere. When he was a baby puppy learning to sleep in his crate at night (instead of playing with his brother), Bertie always curled up and slept right next to the crate with his big head right by his baby's son's head. Anywhere we went, they were always side by side. Jovi while being Mr. Independent compared to his dad and brother, was more of a bugle boy ahead of the other two when we went out walking. So he saw and heard things first and was the one to bark and stare with his dad and brother silently holding positions behind him. <= I have no idea what people may observe with totem poles if they have both boys and girles or just girlies in their pack. But as you can tell, I have just loved watching the dogs as they are.

Many of the things about boys are I love you and girles are please love me.... I think are not true at all. Because dogs are dogs and a lot more unique and wonderful than just that.


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## GOAussies (Dec 3, 2021)

Thanks! I'm having great fun reading all the cute stories and different comparisons.


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## Taz Monkey (Feb 25, 2007)

I have 2 male dogs, but they aren't goldens. My golden is female. She is independent, aloof, kind of a bitch lol. Soooo. She's me, basically, in a dog suit. She is my heart and soul and I love her, and I do love female personalities honestly. I would love to have a male, but I don't think I'd be good at keeping 2 intact dogs of the opposite sex in the same house when the female is in season, so I'll probably never have a boy.


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## MushyB (Oct 31, 2018)

DevWind said:


> My girl is confident, independent, and wicked smart. She is affectionate but it’s a quick I love you and she’s off again. My boy is confident and smart too but not like her. It’s in a different way than her. He’s very snuggly and would live in my face if he could. 🙂


I totally read this with a New England accent in my head "wicked smaat" 😁 I think it was my favorite cousins voice. 

ITA with your comment too


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## DevWind (Nov 7, 2016)

MushyB said:


> I totally read this with a New England accent in my head "wicked smaat" 😁 I think it was my favorite cousins voice.
> 
> ITA with your comment too


It was said in a 100% Midwest “accent” 😉 Which is more of a putting prepositions at the end of sentences than an actual accent. That’s funny though!


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## SRW (Dec 21, 2018)

I've heard from people that have had many that "nothing loves you like a female retriever".


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## diane0905 (Aug 20, 2010)

I have had two male Golden Retrievers. I loved Luke and love Logan more than I can describe. I have a female Cavalier King Charles. She’s so sweet and she also looks at me like she will kill me while I’m asleep if I irritate her. I think I prefer male dogs. I really love Abby also.


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## okko (May 19, 2021)

My wife grew up with a series of female labs. When we got married, we got a female lab. My in-laws have many female dogs between them (labs and mutts).

11 years ago we broke the chain and got a male golden. Fast forward to now and we have a male golden puppy.

Hard to differentiate breed from sex, but we are now firmly on team male. They’re goofy and stay puppy-like longer. They don’t spook and aren’t neurotic. They don’t seem to care about other dogs. (They’re OK with them, but much more interested in people.)

“Less neurotic” sums up our experience, though we love all dogs! (Except pit bulls and I will die in that hill.)


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## ArkansasGold (Dec 7, 2017)

I love my sweet, sweet boy dearly, but I prefer bitches.


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## Oceanside (Mar 29, 2021)

ArkansasGold said:


> I love my sweet, sweet boy dearly, but I prefer bitches.


Would you mind sharing your reasons? Curious to hear another “dog person” opinion. I’ve only had girls.


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## JanGold (10 mo ago)

I have only had one male dog in my life. When I recently went to purchase a pup, I was undecided about male or female. I could have gone either way. I had a very smart and obedient female who passed 4 years ago and I did events with her. She was a natural at everything but I don't think it had to do with her sex. She just had it all going on. I look at the pup, not the gender. I was offered a special pup (well, we will see over time) that happened to be female so I jumped on it.


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## ArkansasGold (Dec 7, 2017)

Oceanside said:


> Would you mind sharing your reasons? Curious to hear another “dog person” opinion. I’ve only had girls.


I’m selfish and I like to be a dog’s person. I think girls are more loyal to a particular person. 😅 In my case, I am Eevee’s person and that makes me happy. 🤷🏼‍♀️

Eevee is my favorite for other reasons that aren’t necessarily specific to sex. She has more drive, personality, confidence, intelligence, and focus.


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## zinnia (7 mo ago)

ArkansasGold said:


> I’m selfish and I like to be a dog’s person.


Same 🙋🏼‍♀️ 😂


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## Dunmar (Apr 15, 2020)

My female is glued to me. She walks behind me nosing the back of my knees. She lays her head in my lap and sleeps on me at night. She's by far the most affectionate dog I've ever see.
She is also amazing with my 10 month old Grandson and will do anything to lay next to him


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## chelseah (Dec 8, 2020)

I haven’t any boys of my own for comparison, but my ten month old girl is loving but not super clingy. She loves to be with me, yet she’s confident to explore without me right next to her. She’s comfortable with pretty much everyone, but I think it’s clear that I’m her person. I love this balance. My husband had a female lab already when we met, and she was a super sweet girl as well, but a lot more clingy.


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## jimgl (Jul 25, 2015)

SRW said:


> I've heard from people that have had many that "nothing loves you like a female retriever".


I agree. My last golden male was sweet and gentle. My current golden female want to be in my lap all the time.


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## GoldenDude (Nov 5, 2016)

I'd probably get a male, unless I decided to get a female.


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## zinnia (7 mo ago)

GoldenDude said:


> I'd probably get a male, unless I decided to get a female.


Maybe the solution is to always have one of each?


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## GoldenDude (Nov 5, 2016)

zinnia said:


> Maybe the solution is to always have one of each?


Exactly!


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## SRW (Dec 21, 2018)

I wanted a male out of the litter, fortunately none were available and I got Lily.


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## jimgl (Jul 25, 2015)

My experience:
Males: Sweet, gentle, goofy, calm, loves everyone, other dogs are ok.
Females: Smart, sneaky, energetic, loves her people, other dogs are ok.
Best to have one of each!


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## FUReverGolden (Nov 24, 2021)

GoldenDude said:


> I'd probably get a male, unless I decided to get a female.


Is this where we insert a wink and laughing emoji 💁🏻‍♀️?


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## Reggie 2214 (10 mo ago)

GOAussies said:


> Do you have a gender preference? Which do you prefer and why? What are the pros and cons to male and female goldens in terms of temperament and health?
> 
> My cousin has lived with enough dogs of various breeds to decide that she prefers male dogs to female dogs. She doesn't own goldens, but she owns 2 Labradors, so the dogs are similar.
> 
> Thanks for your input!


Hands down a male!


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## Terry Hunter (7 mo ago)

JerseyChris said:


> Male dogs don't come into season twice a year..  I have not had a female Golden but it seems the general consensus is Males are typically more loving and females tend to be a bit more independent.


We’ve always had females and they too are loving and loyal.


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## Tkrosey (Jun 13, 2020)

Love both but they are different in personality in my experience. I have a Golden and Border Collies. My Golden girl is very loving but independent. My BC boys are loving but needy. They don’t like to be very far from me. If I have someone hold their leash while I walk a course they will watch me with an eagle eye until I return.


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## ziggy3339 (Oct 31, 2012)

GOAussies said:


> Do you have a gender preference? Which do you prefer and why? What are the pros and cons to male and female goldens in terms of temperament and health?
> 
> My cousin has lived with enough dogs of various breeds to decide that she prefers male dogs to female dogs. She doesn't own goldens, but she owns 2 Labradors, so the dogs are similar.
> 
> Thanks for your input!


We have a 9 year old female golden . Got her for myself after losing a 14 yr old cat. She’s a Velcro dog …but for my husband. She walked up to him at 7 weeks, sniffed his sneakers and that was it. He held her 4 hours while we drove home & she’s been following him ever since. She MUST sleep next To him, goes to the bathroom with him , anywhere he is, she needs to make sure he’s alright. For a short time she slept between us, but eventually she managed to get him to move in the middle of the bed so she can be on his side . NOTE: she was the next to last of the litter when we got to chose. The breeder told us she’s a “submissive”. When I asked what that means he just said to remember if she ever got into a right path, she’d lose. We have a TON of dogs (52 now) on our cul-de-sac and never had any fights. So no worries. She sees GOD in everyone, including the mail lady, UPS, Fed Ex, maintenance workers, etc and they all love her right back. She’s also, as a side note very smart. She understands language, full sentences and even some spelling . She was fixed at 6 or 8 mos old (a promise made to our breeder). She swims in the salt water pool regularly (we are in a sub tropical climate ) needs brushing a couple times a week but we don’t even bother with grooming. She’s naturally beautiful, it’s just about getting off extra fur & using shears to clip the tops of paws 🐾. We did take her for grooming twice…once they clipped under her ear and it bled …the vet said he’d be happy to groom her. That’s when I realized brushing her myself was more happy bonding time anyway. We spend that money on best food for her health. Oh....and toys. She’s a soft chew dog so still has some leftover from the day we got her, now totaling hundreds. I’m bad, right?


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## rebeccalvb (Dec 18, 2021)

GOAussies said:


> Do you have a gender preference? Which do you prefer and why? What are the pros and cons to male and female goldens in terms of temperament and health?
> 
> My cousin has lived with enough dogs of various breeds to decide that she prefers male dogs to female dogs. She doesn't own goldens, but she owns 2 Labradors, so the dogs are similar.
> 
> Thanks for your input!


We just like girls. Smaller and generally more affectionate than the makes we’ve been around. Our Maisey is our 8 month old 56 lb lap dog love bug.


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## Rileyboy23 (Apr 24, 2021)

GOAussies said:


> Do you have a gender preference? Which do you prefer and why? What are the pros and cons to male and female goldens in terms of temperament and health?
> 
> My cousin has lived with enough dogs of various breeds to decide that she prefers male dogs to female dogs. She doesn't own goldens, but she owns 2 Labradors, so the dogs are similar.
> 
> Thanks for your input!


We have had three Goldens. Two males and our now 15 month old girl. We had wanted another male because we thought them more loving and snuggly. Hayley came to us one month to the day after we lost our Riley. She had been held back by the breeder and became available...we grabbed her. She is our angel dog. She couldn't be sweeter or more snuggly and bonded. More than our boys were even. Like kids, they are all different, and you can't judge a dog by its sex, but in our case she's a love bug...and the perfect cure for our grief.


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## KellyH (Sep 5, 2010)

My first Golden was female (Bridget). She was my absolute heart dog and a total velcro snuggler, so I wanted a girl the second time round. Bronte (who passed away seven weeks ago shortly before her 12th birthday), was my soul dog BUT she was very independent. Cuddled when I was down or sick or if she was down or sick, but otherwise not nearly as cuddly as Bridget. I never had to train her to stay off the furniture because she never wanted to be on it! She would only get on the couch if she was sick (although she slept on the bed in winter). I still have requested a girl for my next puppy - I'm on waitlists and hopefully will have a puppy by next summer. I think I'm just used to them now. Also I weigh less than 120 pounds so I've always felt more comfortable with girls as they're quite a bit smaller than boys.


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## Megora (Jun 7, 2010)

KellyH said:


> Also I weigh less than 120 pounds so I've always felt more comfortable with girls as they're quite a bit smaller than boys.


Random curiosity, but why would your weight have anything to do with the ability to own a 60# dog vs a 75# dog?

Putting in context - I used to help teaching riding lessons and got to see 3-4 year old girls riding thousand pound+ horses and controlling/working those animals better than some adult riders.


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## KellyH (Sep 5, 2010)

Megora said:


> Random curiosity, but why would your weight have anything to do with the ability to own a 60# dog vs a 75# dog?
> 
> Putting in context - I used to help teaching riding lessons and got to see 3-4 year old girls riding thousand pound+ horses and controlling/working those animals better than some adult riders.


Good question. It's mostly because I recently underwent a kidney transplant so I have certain restrictions and healing takes time as well as rebuilding my stomach muscles, so it was definitely a factor I considered this time around. (But even if that weren't the case, I'd still lean towards a female).


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## Megora (Jun 7, 2010)

KellyH said:


> Good question. It's mostly because I recently underwent a kidney transplant so I have certain restrictions and healing takes time as well as rebuilding my stomach muscles, so it was definitely a factor I considered this time around.


But you are talking about a very small difference between the sexes when it comes to size and strength. You should still be careful in your condition! Re breed standards, you are talking very minor differences.

My sister had a couple surgeries re her innards (cancer) and I remember her keeping that protective pillow in front of her stomach like a shield with my guys. A lot of that oomph they had which was a big BIG concern with my sister would still be there with a girlie.


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## KellyH (Sep 5, 2010)

Megora said:


> But you are talking about a very small difference between the sexes when it comes to size and strength. You should still be careful in your condition! Re breed standards, you are talking very minor differences.
> 
> My sister had a couple surgeries re her innards (cancer) and I remember her keeping that protective pillow in front of her stomach like a shield with my guys. A lot of that oomph they had which was a big BIG concern with my sister would still be there with a girlie.


Those pillows are a godsend!


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## Clipper's mom (Apr 27, 2019)

My husband and I wanted a smaller dog (our petite 3 year old performance golden weighs 45 pounds) because when our last dog was dying of cancer (four years ago) we had to carry him up and down stairs to get outside to pee and poop. We are now 70 and 75, and didn’t think we could carry a big dog again in our 80’s. Our desire for a smaller dog has less to do with their active years and more to do with everyone’s declining years.


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## Taz Monkey (Feb 25, 2007)

I have always preferred female dogs, even though our current female golden thinks the sun rises and sets on my husband. My breeder joked that if I want a dog to love me, I need a boy. Unfortunately, I probably won't, as my current girl is intact and a boy would also be intact and that's just not something I want to deal with. But in my experience, girls love you, boys are in love with you (and also everyone else lol).


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