# olive <3 2/5/06-1/19/19



## cinge (Oct 23, 2012)

I've been a member here for quite some time. Thank you for all the information, stories, remedies, ideas, and support you’ve given me over the years. 

I made the decision on 1/19/19 to put my beloved golden, Olive, to forever sleep. She was 12. Over the month prior her health deteriorated quickly and I witnessed her frustration when day by day she lost more and more of her ability to be independent and to do the things she loved. She looked at me with such sad and confused eyes. I believe I did the right thing at the right time but since she didn’t die naturally, I often wonder whether I put her down too soon.

Everything I do reminds me of her. She was close by me every minute when I was home- and I took her with me whenever I could when I went out. I see her in front of me going up and down the stairs, putting groceries away, I still hear the click click of her toenails on the floor, and I can still smell her wonderful golden smell when I kissed her on the side of her snout- it’s crazy- EVERYTHING reminds me. I have a 17-year old siamese cat who adored Olive for all of her 12 years. He is looking for her constantly and I think he’s just as sad as me. I’m terrified that I’ll lose him soon, too….

I’ve had golden companionship for 25 years. Before Olive, I had Willow- they were related and from the same breeder in Canada who was elderly- Olive’s was her last litter. When Willow passed away I was also heartbroken but somehow, because my kids still lived at home and there was so much going on, it just wasn’t the same as the emptiness I feel now. 

My husband also loved and misses Olive but he seems to be getting used to her absence. He says I’ve got to be positive and view this as the start of a new chapter in our lives- we can go away more often and have more freedom to go out and do things. 

But right now the only thing that eases my mind is thinking about a puppy. I know it’s too soon because I think maybe the reality is that at this point all I want is Olive back. Despite this, I’ve been researching breeders (these forums have been great) and I have put my name on a waiting list for a puppy who hasn’t been conceived yet- potentially ready to come home with me in August. The breeder has been so kind to me, saying that if I don’t feel ready this summer she would transfer my name to the next litter which she expects will be January 2020.

That’s all I’ve got. I know that many of you have experienced the same feelings as me which is why I feel comfortable posting my story here. As I'm writing it is snowing hard- and I'm reminded of how much Olive hated pooping where everyone could see in the snowbank instead of privately in the woods...


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## Cathy's Gunner (Dec 4, 2008)

I'm so sorry for your loss. You will know when you are ready. Everyone is different. Hugs to you, your husband and your cat.


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## cwag (Apr 25, 2017)

I am so sorry for your loss of Olive. Both my girls died at 12, one naturally and one I had to put to sleep because she completely lost use of her back legs. There was a look in her eyes that told me she was done. Please don't doubt your choice, it was the loving and unselfish thing to do for her. I can tell she had a great life with you so try and focus your thoughts on the good times.


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## swishywagga (Nov 13, 2012)

I'm so very sorry for the loss of your precious Olive, if you would like I can add her name to The Rainbow Bridge List.


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

I'm so very sorry for your loss of Olive, she was a huge part of all your lives, I know she is missed. 

Godspeed Olive


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## Lincgold (May 11, 2018)

It’s one of the hardest things to do putting down a much loved pet. I’ve been through it many times and it never gets easy. I’m sure you did the very best for Olive and just remember that she’s not suffering anymore. You will know when it’s right for a new pup who will never take her place but will ease your pain somewhat. Take care,


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## cinge (Oct 23, 2012)

*thank you*

Thank you to all of you for your replies. Olive was a sweet, gentle, loyal, and beautiful girl. Golden for sure.
Cathy's Gunner: Thanks for your hugs, especially from my cat who is confused and sad to have lost his best friend.
cwag: Olive's back legs gave out on her too. She had also lost her hearing a while back and over the last month of her life lost her sight. We stayed close by her always touching her so she knew she wasn't alone and we were there. 
swishywagga: Yes, please add Olive to the Rainbow Bridge list. Thank you for your condolences- Olive was precious indeed.
CAROLINA MOM: Thank you for replying. Olive will always be a huge part of the family. My 2 sons no longer live at home and they are heartbroken. I hope they will still come home to visit- they always greeted her first...
Lincgold: Putting Olive down was one of the hardest things I've ever done but I know she wasn't going to get better- only worse- and that she was suffering, my poor girl. I miss her so so much and appreciate your kind words. I know a puppy is in my future and will be completely loved but also know Olive will never be replaced in my heart.


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## dlmrun2002 (Mar 4, 2011)

You made the ultimate loving decision by taking care of Olive and not letting her suffer. Everyone has to find their own grieving path. I hope yours is short and leads you to another Golden soon. Olive would like that. Feel better soon.

Godspeed to Olive

dlm ny country


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## LynnC (Nov 14, 2015)

I am so sorry for your loss of Sweet Olive. May her memories bring you some comfort. Rest In Peace sweet Olive.


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## swishywagga (Nov 13, 2012)

cinge said:


> Thank you to all of you for your replies. Olive was a sweet, gentle, loyal, and beautiful girl. Golden for sure.
> Cathy's Gunner: Thanks for your hugs, especially from my cat who is confused and sad to have lost his best friend.
> cwag: Olive's back legs gave out on her too. She had also lost her hearing a while back and over the last month of her life lost her sight. We stayed close by her always touching her so she knew she wasn't alone and we were there.
> swishywagga: Yes, please add Olive to the Rainbow Bridge list. Thank you for your condolences- Olive was precious indeed.
> ...


I have added your sweet girl to the list.


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## cinge (Oct 23, 2012)

*questions*

Thank you for your replies LynnC and dlmrun2002. Olive always woke up early and would patiently wait for me to wake up by just laying her head on the side of my bed. Most mornings I opened my eyes and her nose would be 2" from mine. A memory that hopefully will bring a smile but right now brings tears.

I haven't posted on the forum often so I'm not familiar with protocol- I'm wondering why my thread was moved from the grief support section to the gr rainbow bridge? Also, I was wondering how I can post a picture in a post. I don't see a link to attach a photo. 

Thank you for your help! These forums have become a daily destination and a lifesaver for me- from knowing so many know exactly how I'm feeling- to smiling at the amazing pictures of your goldens and golden puppies. We are truly blessed by the goldens in our lives.


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## Ivyacres (Jun 3, 2011)

Sorry for your loss of Olive. Like so many others, we understand your heartbreak. 

When Olive crossed the Rainbow Bridge, she left room in your heart for a puppy. I hope you find one when the time is right.


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## Slowpoetry (Sep 22, 2009)

I am so sorry for your loss and I understand completely the feeling of emptiness that comes with losing one’s good companion. We lost our golden last September, and like you, our kids are grown. I immediately contacted a breeder who kindly put me on her list for the litter she hopes will arrive next fall. Knowing that another golden may be in my future has helped a lot, and time- time has helped. I still miss my Molly every day, but I find the love she was and gave is larger now than the loss of her. Love and comfort to you.


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## cinge (Oct 23, 2012)

*thank you*

Thank you Slowpoetry and Ivyacres. It helps me so much to know people who understand what I'm feeling. It's been a month since Olive died and I still cry- I miss her so much and am reminded of her constantly. The shock has worn off somewhat but I still just can't believe i'll never see her again.

I know that I am a nurturer and Olive definitely helped me bridge the gap when my kids left home. Olive didn't generate laundry- yay- but made up for that when she strolled into the house having rolled in whatever it was she loved to roll in. But I feel like Olive was also a nurturer- and was always there for me when I needed her during the best and worst of times over the years. I know Olive can never be replaced but you all are right- I realize that a puppy has to be in my future. I am who I am with a dog. Thank you again for your support and insights.


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## Brodys Rockies (Jan 8, 2019)

cinge said:


> I made the decision on 1/19/19 to put my beloved golden, Olive, to forever sleep. She was 12. Over the month prior her health deteriorated quickly and I witnessed her frustration when day by day she lost more and more of her ability to be independent and to do the things she loved. She looked at me with such sad and confused eyes. I believe I did the right thing at the right time but since she didn’t die naturally, I often wonder whether I put her down too soon.
> 
> My husband also loved and misses Olive but he seems to be getting used to her absence. He says I’ve got to be positive and view this as the start of a new chapter in our lives- we can go away more often and have more freedom to go out and do things.
> 
> But right now the only thing that eases my mind is thinking about a puppy. I know it’s too soon because I think maybe the reality is that at this point all I want is Olive back. Despite this, I’ve been researching breeders (these forums have been great) and I have put my name on a waiting list for a puppy who hasn’t been conceived yet- potentially ready to come home with me in August. The breeder has been so kind to me, saying that if I don’t feel ready this summer she would transfer my name to the next litter which she expects will be January 2020.


First, I'm sorry about the loss of Olive...I so understand the feelings you're experiencing. We had to do the same with River, our 11 year old Golden just this past December 15, 2018. 

You mentioned that you wondered if you did the right thing by putting Olive down when you did. From my observations and personal experiences, I think many of us wait too long in making this really tough decision for all the wrong reasons. Meaning, innocently, we all want our pets to live longer so we can enjoy them for more time. Sadly, if you think about it, when pet owners think this way, we're really thinking more about us and what we want as opposed to thinking about what is best for our pets. Doing the right thing by our furry friends requires a complete change in our thought process. If all of us would consider what is best for our beloved pets, I do believe it would make the decision much easier, though making this tough decision is never without pain and loss. 

That said, I think you made the right decision for Olive. You and Olive shared 11 beautiful years together. She was sharing with you as best as she could that it was her time to say goodbye. You demonstrated pure love for Olive by relieving her from her pain and discomfort. In short, all of your thoughts in making the best decision you could was about Olive and not yourself. I tip my hat to you for thinking about what was best for Olive. 

Going forward, you mention that all you can think about now is a new puppy. We realized the same after we lost a cat named Sven. My wife and I were so sad when we lost Sven. A few months later my wife said she was ready to look for another kitten, so we adopted Bella from the local shelter. As soon as Bella came into our home the atmosphere changed immediately. We again had smiles on our faces and joy in our hearts as we enjoyed the presences of new life in our home and lives. 

Then we had to put River down after a short 8-month battle with cancer. We had a tumor removed that proved to be an aggressive form of cancer that our vet said would most likely return in a matter of weeks or a few months. River lived for eight more wonderful months. Had anyone not known that he was sick, they would have never been able to tell he had cancer by the way he lived his life right up to the end. Then in just a few days, his health went downhill rapidly. He soon stopped eating his normal food portions and became lethargic. River was letting us know that his time was near.

The last thing I wanted was for River to suffer. A new growth appeared on his throat near the same location where we had the cancerous lump removed. I had this vision of River reaching a point where his breathing might become laborsome due to the new growth. The last thing I wanted was for River to look at me in a panic because he was having difficulty breathing, and there was nothing I could to help him, so like you, we too had to make the tough decision as to what was best for our River. 

It's now Feb 18. We're scheduled to pick up a new pup, Brody, this coming Saturday. From the moment we began our search, our feelings of loss and pain began to ease. We can never replace a pet lost, but as your husband suggested, possibly it's time to begin thinking about a new chapter in your lives, whether that be traveling with or without a pet. We choose to travel with our pets, so we purchased a camper trailer so we can take our pets with us.:smile2: I'm not suggesting this is the right choice for everyone. Only you and your husband will know what the best choice is for you. 

IMHO, you made the right choice for Olive. I also don't think you should feel guilty thinking about getting another puppy. Just like Bella put smiles and joy back into our home and lives, I'm confident a new puppy can do the same for you, just as the thought of bringing home Brody has us looking forward to a new chapter in our lives as well. 

Keep us posted, God Bless!


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## cinge (Oct 23, 2012)

Dear Brodys Rockies,

Your reply means so much to me- thank you for taking the time to reach out.
I know Olive had had enough- the way she looked at me that Friday evening told me for sure and I put her to sleep Saturday morning. You're right, selfishly I still wish I had more time with her even if it had been just a few days or weeks. But I know it had to happen and sooner or later I would have to live without her somehow. Also, watching her struggle those last couple of weeks caused me physical as well as emotional pain. There's a reason why we say our hearts are breaking. Intellectually I know it was the right time and the right thing to do. Emotionally, I'm a wreck.

Your experiences with your cat and golden- and how getting a kitten and soon a puppy has brightened your world speaks volumes to me. Bottom line is that I need a golden in my life.

Thank you so much.


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## luciahansen (Jul 29, 2014)

My heart goes to you.... I too, made the difficult decision last Saturday, when our Zeke stopped eating, even steak (!)... he was telling me that the osteosarcoma pain was just too much. Making that decision is so very difficult... part of the stewardship of having a Golden pup in one's family. I'm so very grateful that we still have our younger dog, Rocco, who licks my tears and cuddles when I'm feeling sad. I agree, having no dogs makes vacations much easier, but the life without a loving pup is not a life that I'd want. I support your idea of acquiring another pup.... one can never "replace" a dog, however, another dog fills the emptiness!


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