# Not sure if it's time



## Bellasmomjenna (Jun 13, 2014)

]We adopted our sweet Bella over a year ago knowing she had a tumor, but not knowing the details. We had it tested and it was a stage two mast cell tumor. We opted not to operate because they didn't think good margins would be possible and she's been through so much (passed around very insecure etc) and she's been fine until the last two months. About 3months ago she started having a few random bladder accidents we didn't think much if it then she got a couple hot spots which turned into her losing hair and having skin issues over her entire back legs and face (I mean no hair awful raw vet had never seen something like this) we treated with prednisone antibiotics and topicals meanwhile she was peeing everywhere and drinking buckets if water so we stopped the prednisone but it didn't change her peeing, lethargic behavior, drinking, etc she also wasn't interested in good unless I made her eat this went out for at least two weeks the did ultrasounds and found a punk spot on her liver and kidney but didn't see growths then they did a bunch if blood work and tested for everything under the sun and did a urinalysis her white cell count was off the chart and then the doctor wanted to do an MRI to see if she now had a brain tumor which we didn't do because we know she has a mast cell and we honestly can't spend $3000 just on an MRI 

So she stays on antibiotics s and starts getting better some bursts of energy able to go on walks again etc that lasted maybe two weeks if that now she is having diarrhea everywhere for 24 hours and couldn't even keep rice down(threw it up with yellow foam) and stopped drinking I feel like even though she has some bursts of energy and is "fine and sweet sometimes" if she is really suffering i don't want her to suffer and I feel like we are on a roller coaster has anyone else experienced this


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## Anon-2130948gsoni (Apr 12, 2014)

My heart goes out to you. I think many of us know what you're going through, and it's really, really painful.

I've made the hard decision six times. It's never easy. All you can do is sit down with your dog in a quiet moment, tell you how much you love her, and then listen to your heart and what it's really telling you. If her bad days seem to outnumber her good ones, at some point, you just give them the gift of peace.


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## Doug (Jul 17, 2010)

Welcome to the forum 

First of all, what a champ you are for taking Bella in and loving her so intensely :')
You are obviously doing all you can to keep her as comfortable as can be.

Bella must be feeling awful and I know how overwhelming this must be for you. Only you know your golden well enough to decide when. It is inevitable that at the end life becomes difficult but it gets to the point where it becomes crystal clear that it is too much for them to bear and you love them so much you cannot see them go through this another day then it is time. 

It was also helpful to think about what I would want my golden to do for me if the situation was reversed.

I wish you and Bella the very best of luck. May the angels light your way.


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## Rookie's Dad (Feb 19, 2014)

Having just gone through a battle with Mass Cell Tumors, I can relate to what you are going through. We lost the battle last month with Rookie and it was very hard. But one day we just knew, it was time and we had to let him go. As people said to us, "Better one day too soon, than an hour too late." Anyway, you might find it helpful to read Rookie's story in the cancer section, "Heading for the Bridge" by Rookie's Dad. MCT are very hard to handle, if you have any questions re. our experience let me know. Best of luck to you.


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## Bellasmomjenna (Jun 13, 2014)

I don't want it to get too bad and my husband and I are in thinks "well if she gets sick again or has diarrhea badly again" because now she is acting peppy again i am so afraid of making the wrong decision I had decided and then she pepped up again so i just don't know now


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## Doug (Jul 17, 2010)

Just know that this is a normal part of the process, things can change very quickly with highs and lows. When the time is right you will know without doubt.


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

I'm so sorry that you and Bella are going through this. It is so hard when they are older and sick. Would the rescue help with the bills since she had the tumor when you got her?

Sometimes older females develop a condition that our vet used to call "spayed incontinence." There are inexpensive pills that can clear it up, though they have to be taken for the rest of her life. Rather than assuming this is cancer related, I'd start by asking about this and also making sure she doesn't have a urinary tract infection.

Best of luck!


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## GoldenMum (Mar 15, 2010)

My heart breaks for you. I have had to make that awful decision twice in the last 9 months. As others have said, you will know. It is a very personal choice, and I choose quality over quantity. Please know my thoughts are with you.


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## JeanieBeth (Jul 13, 2013)

Bellasmomjenna said:


> I don't want it to get too bad and my husband and I are in thinks "well if she gets sick again or has diarrhea badly again" because now she is acting peppy again i am so afraid of making the wrong decision I had decided and then she pepped up again so i just don't know now


Welcome! I'm so sorry to read your thread about your beautiful Bella. Cancer is a rollercoaster no one should have to ride. One day at a time. We say around here~"stable is good"..
Dancer is on Tylan powder for diarrhea, Cerenia for nausea and Forte Flora, a probiotic. Dancer doesn't do well with rice and keeps steamed potatoes (white or sweet), chicken and carrots down best. We dip all her meds in peanut butter. Read everything you can on mast cell. Bella will let you know when it's time. Trust your heart. Again, I'm so sorry you're Bella has this dreadful disease. We're here for you..

Sent from Petguide.com Free App


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## rbi99 (Jan 4, 2014)

You guys are incredible people to have taken in an older sick dog like you have and taken her in completely. To your question, if Bella had been forced to be put down last month what would she have missed? Two weeks ago, last week? Being alive is not the same thing as living. If you feel she would have missed out on so much because of her numerous good days, then you have your answer. If not, maybe you also have your answer.


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## luvs2laff75 (Apr 29, 2014)

I can sympathize with you. We are currently struggling with the decision with our 8.5 year old Toby. He was diagnosed with a brain tumor a month and a half ago and we have his seizures controlled, but over the past week he has started eliminating constantly in the house (which he has NEVER done), walking in large circles outside, looks like he's struggling more with his back legs, walking around like a 90 year old man, sleeping more than ever, and just lost his "sparkle". I get to the point where I feel like I am going to make the call, and then he looks at me or something and it's that rollercoaster ride all over again. It's like no matter what, I feel guilty. Guilty if I keep him going too long, yet guilty if I let go too quickly. This is the first dog I will have to make this decision for, and it's so hard. To complicate matters, I feel like we need to let Toby go sooner rather than later, but my husband says we should wait until he's suffering. Yes, he still has a few good moments here and there, but I feel like the bad is definitely outweighing the good now, and I know it's only going to get worse. My vet even said it sounds like "the end is nearing". I hope you are at peace with whatever decision you make. There is no easy answer. But, we all love our dogs no matter what and I think they know that.


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## rbi99 (Jan 4, 2014)

luvs2laff75 said:


> I can sympathize with you. We are currently struggling with the decision with our 8.5 year old Toby. He was diagnosed with a brain tumor a month and a half ago and we have his seizures controlled, but over the past week he has started eliminating constantly in the house (which he has NEVER done), walking in large circles outside, looks like he's struggling more with his back legs, walking around like a 90 year old man, sleeping more than ever, and just lost his "sparkle". I get to the point where I feel like I am going to make the call, and then he looks at me or something and it's that rollercoaster ride all over again. It's like no matter what, I feel guilty. Guilty if I keep him going too long, yet guilty if I let go too quickly. This is the first dog I will have to make this decision for, and it's so hard. To complicate matters, I feel like we need to let Toby go sooner rather than later, but my husband says we should wait until he's suffering. Yes, he still has a few good moments here and there, but I feel like the bad is definitely outweighing the good now, and I know it's only going to get worse. My vet even said it sounds like "the end is nearing". I hope you are at peace with whatever decision you make. There is no easy answer. But, we all love our dogs no matter what and I think they know that.


Please reread what you described as your sweet Toby's recent days - would you want to be remembered like that if it was you you were talking about? A vet is not going to tell you it's time even if they feel it is. When we put Grin down it was only later that he told us he felt it was the right decision. If we would have wanted to try and extend his life (even at the cost of making him miserable) he would have done that. Unless Toby passes at home, putting off the decision will not be any easier. I died a little the day I had to make the decision, that is the price we have to pay for loving our dogs like we do.


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