# What is happening to my Golden?



## Chelle0704 (Jul 13, 2005)

*Good morning, *

*My Dog Rocky is a 3 year old energetic and lovable GR. *

*My sister in law recently moved in with us and Rocky sleeps upstairs with her at the foot of her bed. He has done this before when we have had visitors so it was not a surprise when she first moved in that he chose to sleep upstairs. *

*She has now been here going on 4 months and has some mental and health problems. She spends tons of time sleeping and only comes down to smoke a cigarette some-days. *

*At first I thought he was just keeping her company but now he refuses to come when he is called. He immediately runs up the stairs and when I call him he stops and looks at me then turns away and goes into her room. He is up there sleeping all day with her and completely ignoring our other animals now during the day. *

*Rocky has always been a very obedient dog and has always come to us when we call. He now looks very tired all the time and only comes down when my sister in law goes to have her cigarette. While they are outside she throws the ball for him a few times then they both come back in then straight back upstairs. *

*Has anyone ever seen this? I am not sure if this is something I should be too concerned about but, when he refuses to come down when called, is slightly disturbing to me. Please let me know what you think. Any and all advice, suggestions, etc. are more than welcome. *

*Thank you!*
*Chelle*


----------



## Skenney (Jul 10, 2005)

I'm really not all that experienced, but do you think he can sense that something's not right with her and is staying with her to sort of care for/protect her? Some animals have such a strong sense of that sort of thing. 

I read about this mastiff that was so in tune with her master that when he started to get some sort of illness where he got seizures, she'd know he was getting a seizure before he'd even feel something was wrong and would alert him. He'd call 911 and by the time they got there he was in a full fledged seizure.

Maybe your dog is just very aware that something's wrong and doesn't want to leave her alone?


----------



## Chelle0704 (Jul 13, 2005)

*Dear Skenney, *

*Thank you so much for your reply. Maybe that is it. Maybe it is just a natural instinct for him. *

*Thank you, have a great day!*

*Chelle*


----------



## monomer (Apr 21, 2005)

Wow, this is way out of my league but I'll give it a try...

The information is very sketchy but I really think whatever your sister-in-law is trying to work through, she's going about it in a very un-healthy manner. Rocky, having shared the 'den' with her for 4 months (when you think of a dog's lifespan that is really a very long time) is probably relating to her as a full-fledged 'pack' member and has form a strong attachment... this is not necessarily a bad development, it depends largely on your particular household's personality/arrangement/etc. Being as your sister(-in-law) has nothing else going on in her life, she can offer Rocky attention 100% of the time, and what Golden wouldn't love that? Yes, they are bonding... are you finding yourself a little jealous of that... if so, I think that's a perfectly understandable/normal response. But I also believe that when your sister gets back to having a real (more normal) life... Rocky too will quickly adjust back to his 'normal' life as well.

The bottom-line as I see it is... don't worry so much about Rocky but rather try working with your sister-in-law (or getting professional help) help her through this 'thing' as quickly as possible... for the sake of all involved.

(Since I don't have a clue as to your sister-in-law's issues, my advice could probably be nonsense or worse insulting to you... if so, I do apologize but as I said... the info is sketchy and this is all probably way out of my league. Understand I'm just trying help.)


----------



## Chelle0704 (Jul 13, 2005)

*That was great and probably right on the mark. *

*A little more information on my SIL:*
*She is a 40 year old sever Hypochondriac and believes she has every ailment under the sun. We have gotten her involved in our church and she works only 2 or 3 times a week. She sees a therapist weekly for her ailments. She moved here to start a new life but so far it's only a new location. Just want her to be happy. *

*Anyway, thanks for the input. I really appreciate the advice. Rocky is an amazing Golden and we are blessed to have him in our lives. I would attach a great picture of him but have not figured that one out yet. *

*Have a great day!*

*Chelle*


----------



## AbbeyRose (May 22, 2005)

Just another point of interest: How much time do you get to spend with your golden? Maybe he is forgetting just who the alpha is and needs a gentle reminder. Take him on nightly walks, a little obedience training and lots of fun and love. He may decide to spend a little more time down stairs if there is a treat or two around. Let us know how it goes. Good Luck:wavey: :heartbeat


----------



## monomer (Apr 21, 2005)

Chelle0704 said:


> *...and only comes down to smoke a cigarette some-days... *
> 
> *...when my sister in law goes to have her cigarette... *





Chelle0704 said:


> *...She is a 40 year old sever Hypochondriac and believes she has every ailment under the sun... *


I can't help but see the irony here, don't you???

I was a very heavy smoker for many years and from time-to-time I would kid myself into believing I was trying to quit... the effort would last maybe a day or two at the very most... often I couldn't make it 10-minutes past the end of lunch. However about 15 years ago I began having heart palpitations and it scared me so bad (I thought I was REALLY going to die) I just quit 'cold turkey'. Well several months later I discovered the palpitations were a result of drinking too much coffee and coke (NO, the soda!)... in other words a caffeine over-dose so to speak. However I never did go back to smoking. The morale of this story is... if you really believed something were killing you, you'd have no problem quiting doing that thing.

Though I'm intrigued I won't pretend to be a psycho-analyst... so I'll just stop here.


----------



## Chelle0704 (Jul 13, 2005)

*Hello again, *

*Thank you for your reply's I really appreciate your assistance. *

*Monomer, congratulations on your winning the battle with cigarettes. My husband just quit smoking on May 27th. Yae! *


*Abby Rose, thank you so much for writing to me. Here is a daily/weekly/monthly routine we have with our dogs. *

*We walk and play (Frisbee, Fetch, Find Jack, etc.) with Rocky and Bear (our Boarder Collie/Lab Pound puppy) everyday. They swim in our pool daily and we take them everywhere on the weekend. The Ranch, The Beach, Friends homes to play with other dogs, etc. They also get a ton of love while sitting next to us on the couch and can walk off lead with and slightly behind us (thanks to Cesar Milan) if necessary. They have learned all basic commands and some advanced. That is why we are a little shocked when Rocky started to ignore are come command last week. *

*Looks like things are coming to an end anyway with the SIL. We are going to request she move out immediately. This has nothing to do with Rocky by the way. She is just out of control and has become mean and combative. *

*Thank you again for your responses. I am so glad I found a forum with such great dog/animal lovers. Hope you all have a good day. *

*God Bless you and your families, *

*Chelle*


----------



## gold'nchocolate (May 31, 2005)

Hi,
It sounds as if your sister-in-law may also be suffering from depression. If this is the case she may need some tough love on your part to get some help. You aren't doing her any favors by letting her sleep her life away even if she makes you feel guilty when you give her a choice--get help or get out. Sorry if that sounds harsh but you don't want to be an enabler.

Dogs can suffer from depression too, so it's important that he not sleep his life away too at such a young age. Exercise and socializing is good for the soul and you may need to practice a little tough love on his part by putting up a gate so he can't spend as much time upstairs.
Cathy


----------



## Chelle0704 (Jul 13, 2005)

Hello Sasha,

Thank you so much for your email. 
We did exactly what you recommended. We have made him start sleeping back down stairs with us at night and told our SIL that she has to move out by the 1st of August. 

Rocky is already doing better and we are excited to have our lives back to normal. 

Have a great day. 
Chelle


----------



## shaneamber (Apr 20, 2005)

Chelle,you are doing the right things with your Golden and with the sister-in-law.It's call "tough love".Sometimes we all need a swift kick in the butt to help point us in the right direction.
BRAVO to you and your husband for doing the right thing to help your golden and his sister.
BTW I started smoking at age 15,I stopped smoking at age 46 as I laid on the operating table because of a heart attack.One of the worst methods for stopping smoking,but one of the best reasons.
Shane


----------



## mojosmum (May 20, 2005)

CONGRATULATIONS SHANEAMBER AND MONOMER for kicking the smoking habit!!!!


I haven't had a smoke since April 16 2004 (three days after my first grandbaby was born). I've put on WAYYYYYYY to much weight so that'll be the next hurdle. :doh:


----------



## shaneamber (Apr 20, 2005)

Thank You Donna,I too put on weight,way too much.However,I have lost 45 pounds since the middle of February.I watched the super bowl from a hospital bed.Seems I was dehydrated,so much in fact that they had 3 bags flowing at the same time.I gained 11 pounds in 3 days and it wasn't the food.I have diabetes and have to give myself two shots a day.I'm allowed 1800 calories and no sugar.Again,the hard way to loose weight.I'm doing pretty good and am looking forward to losing more fat.
Surprisingly,the no sugar and low fat foods are much better than I expected.
Shane


----------



## mojosmum (May 20, 2005)

Shane: Sorry to hear about the diabetes. I'm sure it gave you a fright! Our health is the most important thing we have and I'm amazed at how us humans usually abuse it (especially me!!!)

How are you doing now? Do you have to cut out the carbs too (bread)?


----------



## Chelle0704 (Jul 13, 2005)

Hello Shane, 

Glad that you are better. Terrible way to quit the habit but you did it! Some people never make it even when they have a enormous scare as you did. 

Thank you for the kind words and encouragement. We are in the home stretch now. 

Rocky is doing great since he started sleeping back down with us again. He is getting back to his old ways and I am so glad to see his happy grin again. Yae!!!

Hope you have a great day. Stay away from that sugar. 

Best Regards, 
Chelle


----------



## shaneamber (Apr 20, 2005)

Hello Chelle,I'm glad to hear that Rocky is feeling better.It's always hard to watch your furbaby not feeling well,but Goldens have an ability to bounce back when showered with love.
No sugar,sweet & low and Stevia are what I use.Check out the Stevia link.http://www.stevia.net/

Hello Donna,I'm doing pretty good.I have to limit carbs,but can still have them.I have an egg every morning for breakfast and my Cholesterol is down from 235 to 116.
I'm getting my strength back and hope to be back down to 190 pounds by next year.
I bought one of those Tony Little Gazelle exercise machines.He makes it look easy,I started out with 3 minutes and now do between 10 and 12 minutes.When I can do 30 minutes,I'll hookup the resistance gizmo's.
Thanks for asking,
Shane


----------



## Miss Daisy's Mom (Jun 29, 2005)

I quit smoking cold turkey 1 year and 37 weeks ago. I haven't cheated once, and now the smell of cigarette smoke makes me sick. When I watched how smoking slowly killed my mother, I knew I didn't want to go through that or have my children and grandchildren have to watch it. It's the best thing I've ever done for myself! Yes, I put on some weight, but I'd rather be a little overweight than dying from smoking!!

CONGRATS and WELL DONE to you who have also quit!!


----------



## monomer (Apr 21, 2005)

Wow, I can't believe how far off-course this thread has gotten...

Chelle, hope your SIL is trying to pick herself up by now... assuming she is now on her own. And I'll bet Rocky is starting to act like the old Rocky again, huh?

About the weight... people, you already have the perfect weight reducing machine laying right next to your feet... you know, the one in the golden fur suit. Sidney is my fitness partner and weight control program and my motivation expert. Exercise is an absolute necessity for any dog but most especially essential for the well-being (mental and physical) of a member of one of the sporting breeds. It is cruel to neglect this basic need... a need nearly as important as food and water. Knowing this I make sure everyday that Sidney gets at least an hour of exercise, often several times a day. This is then also my exercise regimen as well... be it bicycling for an hour down the 'rails-to-trails' (Sidney sets the pace), brisk leash-walking around town for a half hour to an hour, walking while also tossing a Frisbee or throwing a tennis ball... I do this at the local park, at the lake or along a trail (just throwing something around only exercises the dog, so I always walk during a game of fetch... besides it makes it more exciting for the dog), we go hiking at my pace in the woods or state park (yes, off-leash, shhhhhh). If you begin thinking of your dog as your exercise program you will stick with it a long time... besides you owe it to your dog as well as yourself.


----------

