# The roller coaster of living with a chronic disease



## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Hi Everyone -

As many of you know 2 years ago I was told my Remy had Glomerulonephritis and the prognosis as bad as it gets. Not one to give up I then spent several months trying to do the best for my happy/goofy boy - only to then be told that the original diagnosis was wrong, he has Focal Segmental Glomeruloschlerosis which meant the prognosis was cautiously optimistic.

For the past 1.5 years Remy has been on prescription kidney diet and enalapril to reduce the effort required of his kidneys and he has been stable - as proven by blood and urine tests every three months. Each and every time we went for those tests, I would be on pins and needles until I saw the results come back that he was still stable. I have been so happy and yes I think I got cocky - don't tell me my dog is going to die!

Last week I had a feeling the results were not going to be the same, and I was right. His UPC, BUN and phosphorus values are all up, his creatinine is slightly up. I freaked out. My Vet has spent the past few days trying to keep me off the edge - and for the most part it's working, but not completely.

It is getting harder and harder to get Remy to eat his breakfast, thankfully he then is so hungry at night that he gobbles down his dinner - but still I want him to eat it all. And I want him to be stable - I cannot bear to lose the win I thought we had. 

Periodically I look over at him and I see him laying there panting. I wonder if this is a sign of discomfort or nausea (kidney patients frequently get lost their appetites because of the toxins in their blood). My neighbor noticed it the other day too - so it's not just me. 

I have ordered a different prescription kidney diet in the hope that he will find it more palatable. We have added a phosphorus binder to his meds to reduce those values and I am giving him Pepcid AC twice a day just in case he is having tummy issues. There is a very slight possibility that he was just dehydrated the day we did the last tests, I want to believe that, but I can't - because of the eating and all. 

In three weeks we go back for a retest. I hope to heck I can report back that all is back as it should be, but I am so afraid. I will be watching his every single move over the next three weeks. I will probably drive my Vet crazy - but I don't know what else to do.

Thank you for just letting me emote here. I guess I just needed to say it all.


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## cubbysan (Mar 13, 2007)

Hugs! So sorry you are going through this. I have never heard of this condition.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks Cubbysan - for what it is worth, Google is NOT my friend at the moment! I've been finding BAAD stuff. I keep sending my Vet questions. I think I need to get offline, get outside and enjoy the nice weather with my pup!


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## 3 goldens (Sep 30, 2005)

Would cranberry caps any at all? My golden boy Buck had a bad kidney infection (some 11 years ago I guess it was) and I started giving him cranberry capsules and he never got another one. I really don't know if they helped, but for sure they didn't hurt him. And my vet thought it was a good idea

Two years ago next month I was in stage 5 kidney failure --my numr was 8, which is either transplant or dialysis. I spent 12 days in hospital and got dialysis 4 times. I was very lucky that thepart that failed is the part that will generate and thebiopsy it was doing so. I got to come home when it was up to 26--still stage 4. Since then it has been mostly in the 30's but last time it was 43. I have to have it cheeked every 3 months. The kidney doctor told me to take cranberry capsules. I would have loved the juice instead, but I am diabetic and don't need the sugar. Oh, it was one of my meds for diabetes that caused my kidney failure.

I don't know anything about the disease you sweet boy has so cranberry might not be a good idea. But you could check with your vet. My primary doctor also has me on Milk thistle to try to protect my liver from some of the meds I have to take. I am anemic, but luckly not had to have any blood transfusions in almost 2 years. Diabetes, stage 3 kidney failure, pacemaker and 2 stents in my heart (heart doesn't beat at all with this pace maker), rheumatoid arthritis, so I take lots of meds and have to try to protect my liver and kidneys as much as possible.
I sure hope your next results come in good. My dogs are not eating that much with it being summer. I didn't notice if you show where you live, but we are on the Texas coast and it is "warm" here.


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## LUCKYme (Mar 29, 2015)

I am so sorry. I know the struggle and how it feels when you are waiting on the blood work to come in not knowing which way things are going to go. In the past few months my boy has been having increased liver enzymes and then they went back down and I was SOOO happy! But a week ago they shot right back up. I totally get it. I have no words to make it easier, just know you aren't alone.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

3 goldens said:


> Would cranberry caps any at all?


 
I don't know but certainly worth my asking, thanks! I've already sent my vet a note asking if dogs benefit from Flax Seed oil as a substitute for Fish Oils - Remy stopped eating entirely when I gave him those - but Omega 3s have been shown to provide benefit to kidney patients, both canine and human.

You sure have been through the ringer! Wow is all I can think to say!




3 goldens said:


> I didn't notice if you show where you live, but we are on the Texas coast and it is "warm" here.


This made me laugh - that is quite the understatement - I lived in Houston for two years, so I know how hot it can get out there! I live in NJ and while we had quite a heat wave, the temperature is now down to the 80s


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

LUCKYme said:


> I am so sorry. I know the struggle and how it feels when you are waiting on the blood work to come in not knowing which way things are going to go. In the past few months my boy has been having increased liver enzymes and then they went back down and I was SOOO happy! But a week ago they shot right back up. I totally get it. I have no words to make it easier, just know you aren't alone.


That's why we come here, no one else understands - they think we are nuts (or at least my friends think I am) - we are in this together!


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## GoldenMum (Mar 15, 2010)

Oh Lenna, I hate to see this thread, I thought Remy was doing so well. Please know my thoughts are with you, and yes we understand. I hope his levels stabilize, and you guys get some smooth sailing. Wish they all got great Moms like you. Hugs to you my friend, and belly rubs to Remy!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks Dawn - yes it was a blow to see the values this week - I'm still reeling. Good news is that he seems to like the new kibble, I gave him 50/50 tonight I'll just give him the new food entirely tomorrow and see if he will actually eat it all.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Sorry you got not so good blood results. I have faith that Remy will bounce back again!! Positive thoughts!!!


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## 3 goldens (Sep 30, 2005)

_ I give fish oil capsids t my dogs, but I take the Flax Seed Oil. Actually my eye doctor told me to take it. The diabetes has fouled my vision something awful, but he wants me to take the Flax Saeed oil. _


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Having fought my Sabrina's congenital kidney disease for almost 5 years before I lost her, I feel the ache in your heart so deeply. When the blood tests for my girl changed sharply, it was probably an early indicator of the cardiac cancer - probably hemangio, though no vet ever said so - that took her from me several months later. I hope and pray that is not the case for Remy. 

When my dogs have gotten reluctant to eat, injections of vitamin B-12 have almost always stimulated their appetites again. Joker liked the canned Royal Canin prescription foods much more than the Science Diet ones.

Holding you and Remy gently in my heart and prayers,
Lucy


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

SandyK said:


> Sorry you got not so good blood results. I have faith that Remy will bounce back again!! Positive thoughts!!!


OMG Sandy this actually brought tears to my eyes, thank you so much! I haven't even allowed myself to hope that he bounces back, I'm praying we get him stable again, even if at these levels!

He's still happy and that counts for ALOT! Thank you so much for your positive thoughts - I didn't realize how badly I needed them.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

3 goldens said:


> _ I give fish oil capsids t my dogs, but I take the Flax Seed Oil. Actually my eye doctor told me to take it. The diabetes has fouled my vision something awful, but he wants me to take the Flax Saeed oil. _


Yes I know people can take flax seed oil for omega 3s but I don't know about dogs - waiting for my vet to tell me, but I will probably pick them up today anyway.


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## fostermom (Sep 6, 2007)

I am sorry you are going through this! The emotional rollercoaster of dealing with a chronically ill pet is so hard. Good thoughts and prayers being sent!


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

Just a big hug and positive vibes that the actions you're taking will help. He sure is lucky to have you as a mom!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

If anyone can look bad blood results in the eye and say "screw you!" it's Remy! I hope this was just a blip and that he just continues to do well and be his goofy fun self. Sending you positive thoughts.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> Having fought my Sabrina's congenital kidney disease for almost 5 years before I lost her, I feel the ache in your heart so deeply. When the blood tests for my girl changed sharply, it was probably an early indicator of the cardiac cancer - probably hemangio, though no vet ever said so - that took her from me several months later. I hope and pray that is not the case for Remy.
> 
> When my dogs have gotten reluctant to eat, injections of vitamin B-12 have almost always stimulated their appetites again. Joker liked the canned Royal Canin prescription foods much more than the Science Diet ones.
> 
> ...


 WOW I had not thought of cancer at all! That must have been so heartbreaking, cancer always is. I don't think Remy's results changed that dramatically and I hope they don't. During the 5 years you fought kidney disease did you see incremental changes that caused you to adjust meds and then stabilize again? I think we may be at that stage, but what do I know?!

I will discuss B-12 with my Vet thanks for that. At the moment he is reluctant to eat, but he hasn't really lost weight, so the Vet is less concerned. To date I have used "chicken dust" to entice him to eat - basically I cook chicken and then Cuisinart it to a dust which I sprinkle on his food. A single breast used to last about 5 days as all he needed was a sprinkle to entice him and once he started eating, he would keep going. More recently he would eat the top layer and waits for more chicken before continuing. Then suddenly he wouldn't eat the predusted chicken, he would only eat if I freshly cuisinarted the chicken - and waited while I redusted each layer - in the end eating perhaps three quarters of his food. Last night I switched from Hills K/D (dry he refused the cans a while ago) to Pro Plan NF - I did a 50/50 mix and he ate most of the NF with no chicken sprinkled at all so this morning I gave him 100% NF and he needed the chicken to get started. Deep heavy sigh, I will keep the Royal Caninn in mind, thanks for that!

To be honest part of me is thinking he's just being a brat - but dogs don't typically starve themselves, and given that he is sick I am way too nervous to wait it out. So if he is being a brat - he's winning and I fully admit that I am losing!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

fostermom said:


> I am sorry you are going through this! The emotional rollercoaster of dealing with a chronically ill pet is so hard. Good thoughts and prayers being sent!





jennretz said:


> Just a big hug and positive vibes that the actions you're taking will help. He sure is lucky to have you as a mom!





Sweet Girl said:


> If anyone can look bad blood results in the eye and say "screw you!" it's Remy! I hope this was just a blip and that he just continues to do well and be his goofy fun self. Sending you positive thoughts.


Thanks guys - Please keep sending the positive thoughts - I need them! I took this one badly, probably worse than the results deserve. Thankfully the results are not dire or even emergency levels yet, I'm just so afraid it's the start of a downward spiral. Hopefully I can get my stupid butt past that when we retest at the end of the month. Until then I find myself scared and weepy - so I really appreciate everyone else kicking my a$$ back to positive!

XO
Lenna


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Lennap - the title of your post "living with a chronic disease" jumped out at me.

My Golden Chance was diagnosed with a life-threatening congenital heart condition when he was 7 months old. He had successful surgery at 9 months and has been managed by a cardiologist and meds since then. He just turned 10 y.o. 

Like you, we have been religious with his medication and regular checkups (ECGs etc). Like you, each year we rejoiced when the results showed no significant change and also began to feel it was conquered. I think we were a little cocky also.

This year, in March, Chance collapsed and many many tests later his condition was diagnosed. A new heart problem - VT - a life threatening one. His new medicine seems to be managing it. Without getting into all the details, there is no way other than a 24-hour Holter monitor test, to really know. So for now, we are just trying to keep our spirits high and enjoy every day with Chance. In March and April, I was treating Chance like a china doll and very worried about "ANY" exertion. I even spoke to my vet about my trepidation and fears.

She encouraged me to try hard to get past this and treat him normally within reason. Walks and moderate exercise are important so we have resumed them. _It's hard but I'm determined that he does not get any negative worry vibes from me. Chance is extremely sensitive to us and always "knows" when something is wrong. _So I work every day to be positive and be upbeat and it seems to be working

I know what you are going through and it is tougher than most people realize. Even when things are going well, there's this "light gray" cloud above.

I have also managed cats with chronic kidney disease and appetite is a HUGE problem. Believe me, Remy is not acting - this is SO tough. My emotions, when I went though this, were all over the map! 

Take some time to start every day with positive thoughts and continue to research developments in Kidney disease management. 

I completely understand the monumental amount of energy it takes to manage a chronic condition and stay positive. Remy is likely to rebound - there are lots of ups and downs. He will do best if you are doing good.
Hang in there and remember to take care of yourself as well.


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## tikiandme (May 16, 2010)

I also know what it's like to care for a chronically ill dog. My boy has chronic volvulus with frequently recurring bloat even after gastropexy. He's also had MMM, testicular cancer (at 6 yrs), autoimmune thyroiditis, etc., etc. We've been dealing with the bloat issue since before he was 2. We weren't sure of what it was for years and the vets thought I was exaggerating. Chronic volvulus has a poor prognosis, the life expectancy is about a year after diagnosis, but so far he has survived for 2 years after. But it does take an emotional toll, so I do feel your pain. You have been much stronger and more level headed about it than I have, I think. I am hoping along with everyone here that Remy's blood work much improves at his next test. Stay strong for him, it makes him that much stronger! And if strong means anything, Remy is a rock star!


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Lennap said:


> WOW I had not thought of cancer at all! That must have been so heartbreaking, cancer always is. I don't think Remy's results changed that dramatically and I hope they don't. During the 5 years you fought kidney disease did you see incremental changes that caused you to adjust meds and then stabilize again? I think we may be at that stage, but what do I know?!


The sign that led to Sabrina's diagnosis was refusal to eat. Once we got her on the KD, she resumed eating pretty well and I saw few changes until very late in her (too short) life. My secret weapon was canned chicken broth, which I diluted 50-50 with water and gave it to her (and my boys) at each meal. That kept her hydrated, which was important since she wouldn't drink anything when I was not at home.



Lennap said:


> I will discuss B-12 with my Vet thanks for that. At the moment he is reluctant to eat, but he hasn't really lost weight, so the Vet is less concerned. To date I have used "chicken dust" to entice him to eat - basically I cook chicken and then Cuisinart it to a dust which I sprinkle on his food. A single breast used to last about 5 days as all he needed was a sprinkle to entice him and once he started eating, he would keep going. More recently he would eat the top layer and waits for more chicken before continuing. Then suddenly he wouldn't eat the predusted chicken, he would only eat if I freshly cuisinarted the chicken - and waited while I redusted each layer - in the end eating perhaps three quarters of his food. Last night I switched from Hills K/D (dry he refused the cans a while ago) to Pro Plan NF - I did a 50/50 mix and he ate most of the NF with no chicken sprinkled at all so this morning I gave him 100% NF and he needed the chicken to get started. Deep heavy sigh, I will keep the Royal Caninn in mind, thanks for that!


The Emergency Vet Clinic docs here recommended pork as an alternative to chicken for Joker. He adores it. Recent studies seem to emphasize high-quality protein, saying there is no evidence that a low protein diet increases life span for dogs with renal issues.

The Royal Canin kidney food _smells_ good and I like the list of ingredients a lot better than the alternatives. The canned food is recommended over the dry because of the additional water content, which is important.



Lennap said:


> To be honest part of me is thinking he's just being a brat - but dogs don't typically starve themselves, and given that he is sick I am way too nervous to wait it out. So if he is being a brat - he's winning and I fully admit that I am losing!


Oh how I know this place. :doh: Joker plays me like a harp, and I just let him. When I lose him, I will know that I have done all that I could for him. There is great peace in that.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

goldy1 said:


> Lennap - the title of your post "living with a chronic disease" jumped out at me.
> 
> My Golden Chance was diagnosed with a life-threatening congenital heart condition when he was 7 months old. He had successful surgery at 9 months and has been managed by a cardiologist and meds since then. He just turned 10 y.o.
> 
> ...


Thanks goldy1 this has me in full fledge tears (like I said I am weepy). When Remy was first diagnosed I was given a 3 -12 month prognosis, but that diagnosis was premature and wrong so discount it (while taking pleasure sort of shoving it in their faces 2 years later). But I just found an article that indicates the median life expectancy from diagnosis for what Remy does have, with the symptoms he was displaying at diagnosis is only 605 days (mean 800 days). We are over 720 days now - so I am just so scared that I am on borrowed time. I had a cat live 8 years with kidney disease, but the prognoses are very different for large dogs. 

I am very committed to helping Remy enjoy every single day he has on this earth with me to the fullest, secure in the fact that he is very loved (he was a rescue, so there are issues there). But OMG it's hard knowing it is so fleeting and in the end I will lose.

OY I am just an emotional white hot mess. Regardless thanks for your support it means a lot.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

tikiandme said:


> I also know what it's like to care for a chronically ill dog. My boy has chronic volvulus with frequently recurring bloat even after gastropexy. He's also had MMM, testicular cancer (at 6 yrs), autoimmune thyroiditis, etc., etc. We've been dealing with the bloat issue since before he was 2. We weren't sure of what it was for years and the vets thought I was exaggerating. Chronic volvulus has a poor prognosis, the life expectancy is about a year after diagnosis, but so far he has survived for 2 years after. But it does take an emotional toll, so I do feel your pain.


Wow you have your plate full! I don't know how you do it - I am in awe. You are proof that we must advocate for our dogs, because without us they have no voice. My Vet back when Remy's bloodwork first came back off gave me the wrong diagnosis and REFUSED to do further testing. I will never understand that - if I am willing to pay - why not take my money?! Thankfully I was not to be deterred!



tikiandme said:


> You have been much stronger and more level headed about it than I have, I think.


Hardly! I cried a lot - and then was just full of righteous indignation at having been right - and then cocky that my dog is invincable! I think they call that arrogant stupidity.



tikiandme said:


> I am hoping along with everyone here that Remy's blood work much improves at his next test. Stay strong for him, it makes him that much stronger! And if strong means anything, Remy is a rock star!


Thanks.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> The sign that led to Sabrina's diagnosis was refusal to eat. Once we got her on the KD, she resumed eating pretty well and I saw few changes until very late in her (too short) life. My secret weapon was canned chicken broth, which I diluted 50-50 with water and gave it to her (and my boys) at each meal. That kept her hydrated, which was important since she wouldn't drink anything when I was not at home.


Thankfully Remy drinks a lot of water, so far I have no issue there. 




GoldensGirl said:


> The Emergency Vet Clinic docs here recommended pork as an alternative to chicken for Joker. He adores it. Recent studies seem to emphasize high-quality protein, saying there is no evidence that a low protein diet increases life span for dogs with renal issues.


I have read that too and if i cannot find a commercial product that works I will cook for Remy - it's not ideal because we travel quite a bit - so I guess I would have to freeze portions for the road or something, but everything is doable. Well all except pork - I'm kosher so that is one thing I just can't cook for him. I guess worst case I could ask a friend to do it. Remy is very much a fan favorite everywhere he goes - so I'm sure plenty of people would help out.



GoldensGirl said:


> The Royal Canin kidney food _smells_ good and I like the list of ingredients a lot better than the alternatives. The canned food is recommended over the dry because of the additional water content, which is important.


 I will definitely keep this in mind and give it a try if NF doesn't work.



GoldensGirl said:


> Oh how I know this place. :doh: Joker plays me like a harp, and I just let him. When I lose him, I will know that I have done all that I could for him. There is great peace in that.



I agree I will always know I've done everything possible and while it doesn't help the inevitable - it does beat the alternative.

Thank you!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

I think we all know about the tears. You would trade anything to help Remy. Tears have nothing to do with strength. I get them out of my system when I am not in the house. Strength is pushing on in spite of the problems.

It's good that Remy drinks lots of water. I didn't realize the difference between kidney disease in cats vs large dogs. 

Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way for Remy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

goldy1 said:


> I didn't realize the difference between kidney disease in cats vs large dogs.


 The biggest difference is that with animals under 15 pounds you start giving sub cutaneous fluids almost immediately - which is a very basic form of dialysis and cleans the toxins out of their system. That doesn't work for animals over 15 pounds, so you are stuck very much as you would be with a human kidney patient and dialysis becomes a much bigger deal. 




goldy1 said:


> Sending positive thoughts and prayers your way for Remy.


 Thank you so much, I really appreciate it!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Wow - didn't know about the sub-Q size/weight restriction!

Yes, my husband gave our cats sub-Q fluids. It was very easy on them. They even purred while it was being administered.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

goldy1 said:


> Wow - didn't know about the sub-Q size/weight restriction!
> 
> Yes, my husband gave our cats sub-Q fluids. It was very easy on them. They even purred while it was being administered.


 That was my experience as well, from the very first time I gave sub Q fluids my cat just settled in on my lap - she would start to squirm as we approached her total dosage - somehow she knew when she was done. So when I was first told Remy had kidney disease I thought no sweat, I can handle that! Not so very!

Today I heard back from the specialist who diagnosed Remy's FSGS - she was not alarmed at all, but agreed we need to recheck and possibly add more meds - but she reminded me that we've seen some of these values before (I knew that I keep a trend report of his blood and urine work ups since day 1 of this hell - but I'm still freaked). 

The good news is that he seems to be doing better. He loves the new food, and doesn't even mind the phosphate binder on top of it - of course with his chicken dust. I can't remember the last time he licked his bowl shiny clean, but he has for the past 3 meals. I am trying not to get my hopes up, but that is hard. Who knows we also started him on Pepcid ac 2x a day to see if perhaps his tummy was bothering him - could be that is what is allowing him to eat again and the rest is the same.

Deep heavy sigh. Once again I appreciate the support more than you folks could know!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Lennap said:


> ...
> Today I heard back from the specialist who diagnosed Remy's FSGS - she was not alarmed at all, but agreed we need to recheck and possibly add more meds - but she reminded me that we've seen some of these values before
> ...
> The good news is that he seems to be doing better. He loves the new food, and doesn't even mind the phosphate binder on top of it - of course with his chicken dust. I can't remember the last time he licked his bowl shiny clean, but he has for the past 3 meals. ...


This is fantastic news. I know what you mean about not getting your hopes up too much - but you can celebrate today. With some good meals and nutrition, Remy will regain strength. It's also good to know that your vet still has medications in her arsenal. Just to know that Remy is loving his new food is a huge hurdle and relief.

Keep up the good work Remy!


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

It's good to hear that Remy is eating better....


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## hotel4dogs (Sep 29, 2008)

Have you tried Krill Oil capsules with him? Tito gets Krill Oil every day for its anti-inflammatory properties since he has been Lyme positive.
Dogs metabolize Krill Oil much better than fish oil, and need much smaller doses.
Just a thought.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Glad Remy is eating better!! For now you don't have to worry about Pork...ha,ha. See your boy is looking out for you!!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

hotel4dogs said:


> Have you tried Krill Oil capsules with him? Tito gets Krill Oil every day for its anti-inflammatory properties since he has been Lyme positive.
> Dogs metabolize Krill Oil much better than fish oil, and need much smaller doses.
> Just a thought.


I'll give it a shot, although it was salmon oil capsules that first upset his tummy. We shall see. thanks!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

SandyK said:


> Glad Remy is eating better!! For now you don't have to worry about Pork...ha,ha. See your boy is looking out for you!!


LOL not sure that is ever top on his mind. In Remy-land it is always all about Remy!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Brought Remy in for a check now that he's been on the phosphate binder for and new food for almost 3 weeks. He's gained weight and is now back within his target range - WOOHOO!!!!!

Praying that the lab results are stable - will post in the am.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Remy's results from last week were disappointing. While his phosphorous and creatinine were stable his BUN was through the roof. Plus I continue to think he has a sinus infection - the boy smells like pus! I'm still waiting for the results of the urine culture - but I can't see how that would pick up the sinus infection. So I continue to be on pins and needles trying to find out what we do next.

Regardless we headed west to our scheduled vacation - Remy continues to be his very happy, aggressively friendly self - but stinky. The picture attached is taken from the back yard of our bed and breakfast - overlooking the puget sound. OMG so gorgeous!


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

That is a great picture! I didn't realize that B&B's would allow dogs. That's great!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Remy looks great in the vacation picture. I'm sorry the results weren't better. The infection you suspect may be taxing Remy's immune system. Would that cause the BUN to be high? I don't know but I always trust my gut when I suspect a problem with Chance.

Maybe your vet will have an opinion that can shed some light. 

And enjoy your vacation!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

jennretz said:


> That is a great picture! I didn't realize that B&B's would allow dogs. That's great!


Remy is a service dog - so he goes everywhere. Having said that I don't think there is a rule for all B&B's - some probably do allow and others don't. This one seemed to have absolutely no problem with it. We are staying in a little cabin on the property of a bed and breakfast - that could also have something to do with it, since he won't bother other guests. Although he has entertained them enough by running through the place - and nearly forcing me on a hike as I chased him down the trail (he stopped and waited for me at some point).

More pictures to come later :wavey:


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

goldy1 said:


> Remy looks great in the vacation picture. I'm sorry the results weren't better. The infection you suspect may be taxing Remy's immune system. Would that cause the BUN to be high? I don't know but I always trust my gut when I suspect a problem with Chance.
> 
> Maybe your vet will have an opinion that can shed some light.
> 
> And enjoy your vacation!


My Vet has gone radio silent on me - not sure why that's never happened before. I actually did ask that question, quiet hopefully. I'm thoroughly in over my head on this kidney stuff! The Vet did tell me that his BUN could be elevated because he is getting more protein - I sprinkle "chicken dust" on his food to get him to eat. Basically I grill chicken thighs and cuisnart half a thigh with his probiotics, plaque powder and phosphate binders to get him to take those meds and eat his food. Of course three times the high end of normal is exceptional in my opinion - regardless of what they say about high quality protein being ok. 

I'm stumped. Hopefully my Vet will respond to my emails at some point.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Some more pictures from day one of our vacation - in the first he is looking at the trail thinking hmmmmm. In the second he's looking at me like "aww cmon mom let's go hike!" and the last is a view from the hot tub of one tired pup, and the puget sound through the trees. All in all a good first day


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Thanks for sharing the photos of your gorgeous boy! I continue to hold you and Remy in my thoughts and prayers, hoping that he bounces back from this latest episode.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> Thanks for sharing the photos of your gorgeous boy! I continue to hold you and Remy in my thoughts and prayers, hoping that he bounces back from this latest episode.


Thanks although I have to keep in mind, he feels fine! It's his results that need to shape up! But he is his happy go lucky self (albeit a bit snottier than usual)


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

thought I'd post another of me with my happy copilot. He loves it when we rent cars - they are always smaller than my SUV and he can be almost right up front with me!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

ugh I have no clue why that ended up sideways!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Well we are home from vacation and I figured I'd post just a few more pictures of my boy. The first is at a Starbucks, because it is a must do in in the Seattle area! The next two are on the beach on Whidbey Island - called Admiralty Inlet, which was totally remote, we were literally the only two on the beach! Finally one of Remy completely passed out after an exciting day of play in the PNW!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Overall a very nice trip, but boy is Remy happy to be home! He sure does love his routine.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Glad you both had a good vacation!!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

So hard to believe it's been two months since I last posted to this thread. Remy continues to love life and love people. He has absolutely no idea his condition is getting worse - and frankly I prefer not to tell him, but it breaks my heart. 

Took new bloods and urine tests two weeks ago and reached out again to the kidney specialist to get her opinion. This woman is staggeringly smart and amazing and I feel so lucky that she was at AMC in NYC when I needed her. she has since moved to Ohio State University - but I have made it clear if she needs to see him, I will bring Remy there. So far she has been great with remote advice. We will be adding two new drugs one to reduce his blood phosphorous levels (in addition to the one he is already on) and another to reduce the protein loss in his urine. 

Meanwhile I am posting two new pictures. I have been trying to get a picture of Remy with fall foliage for years - but everytime I step away to take the pic he runs to me! This time he actually stayed! The second pic he looks so intent and beautiful - but the really amazing part is that his nose is black! Remy has always had a brown and sort of pinkish nose - I have no clue when it turned black or how. I had no clue he could ever be more beautiful in my eyes - but there you have it, my beautiful boy!!!!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Nice to see your update! Glad to hear Remy is living life to its fullest - no need to tell him anything indeed! I hope the adjustment of the meds help him to continue to be well. He looks great!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

thanks Sweet Girl - it's funny I check in a few times a week, but don't really post unless I have something meaningful to contribute.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*

Thanks for the update on Remy. The pictures are just beautiful!

Praying for Remy and you-so sorry you are going through this.


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## hotel4dogs (Sep 29, 2008)

So good to see you! Glad to hear any and all updates on Remy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Hey Karen and Hotel4Dogs - thanks to you both.


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

Look how happy he is, great photos of your handsome boy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks KKaren


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

As if his illnesses were not enough, I got a terrible call Monday at the office. The owner of Remy's daycare called to tell me he had been attacked, was bleeding and would not let anyone touch him. OMG my heart was in my throat! I called the vet to advise I was coming with an emergency - ran out of the office to get my baby! Needless to say the minute he saw me Remy was all wiggle butts - but his leg was pretty bloody and he was having trouble walking.

Got him to the Vet walked in and said - "oh thank G-d I got here now I can cry" - and of course burst into tears. Poor Remy cannot be put under general anesthesia because of his kidneys - but the Vet said he was amazing through the whole procedure. They found 3 separate sites that needed to be stitched up. Got him home, and I guess the adrenalin work off, because this dog could not walk at all!

He then spent the next 36 hours refusing to move, not even to go outside to do his business. I was so scared, I called the vet to ask if it was normal for them to literally wet their beds after something like this. The vet said not at all, and if not better today to bring him right back.

Thankfully this morning he woke up and was ready to go out for a walk almost like usual. We've now done several short walks and he is pulling me toward our normal 2 mile walk, thankfully he has turned the corner!

Meanwhile the other dog has been kicked out of daycare and his owner is blaming Remy! My dog was ripped to shreds, your dog has two little puncture wounds (given in self defense) I'm sorry - you are delusional! I finally told her I was most worried about her dog, because if she is going to deny what happened, she is at risk of it happening again, and her dog might be destroyed.

OMG this has been a terrible, TERRIBLE week!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone!


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## Harleysmum (Aug 19, 2014)

So sorry that you have had this terrible week and that poor Remy has been attacked and you have had this extra worry to deal with. I hope that you have a wonderful thanksgiving and can put this behind you.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks Harleysmum - you too!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Lennap said:


> ... Thankfully this morning he woke up and was ready to go out for a walk almost like usual. We've now done several short walks and he is pulling me toward our normal 2 mile walk, thankfully he has turned the corner!
> ...


The above news is the silver lining in an otherwise terrible week. Poor Remy - so brave without sedation. I would be devastated too. Sending prayers and positive vibes to you and Remy. Hope you have a good Thanksgiving and this terrible event fades quickly in the rear view mirror.


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## tikiandme (May 16, 2010)

I'm so sorry Remi was attacked. I'm glad he seems to be feeling better and getting over some of the trauma. I hope you both have a wonderful Thanksgiving.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Well this week has been pretty sucky so far - Remy had a seizure in daycare on Tuesday - we were already scheduled to see his Vet that evening for his acupuncture, so while there we drew blood. The results came back AWFUL. His kidney values are through the roof! He is now at the Animal Medical Center on IV drip to try to clean the toxins out of his blood - and hopefully find out what is going on.

The bizarre thing is that the values are so bad, that no vet understand why he is not lethargic and why is appetite is so good. Any other dog they have seen with such high kidney values has been in end stage renal failure. So once again we are all saying WTH?! 

I for one am praying that it is a kidney infection vs a progression of his kidney disease. An infection can be fixed progression of the disease is too horrible to bare.

So please pray for my boy - lord knows he needs it!


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## Finn's Fan (Dec 22, 2007)

Sending all positive thoughts that the vets can figure this out and that it's something fixable with meds. He's such a handsome, lovely dog; I'm so sorry you two are going through this rotten patch.


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

That's awful news. Sending best wishes for you and Remy.


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## Anon-2130948gsoni (Apr 12, 2014)

I'm so sorry...I've just spent the last six months dealing with that horrible roller coaster and I know it's just so awful.

Sometimes it seems like dogs with chronic illness become targets...not sure why that would be. I'm so sorry your boy had to deal with an attack on top of everything else...just not fair! Maybe it's just the stress that's causing his latest problem and it will resolve quickly as time passes?

Sending you both a hug...


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

I will say prayers for Remy. Oh I hope it is an infection and can be treated with antibiotics. I would take consolation from the fact that he was acting normal and his appetite was good. This means a lot and I am sure they will find the problem to be something treatable. You have him in the right place.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Just wondering how Remy is doing today and did they find an infection.
Still praying hard for good news.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks everyone - it's nice to be able to come here where everyone understands. Remy has been on IV fluids and antibiotics for 24 hours now, and unfortunately we have not seen any material change. The intern who called me this am recommended I bring him home - but my regular Vet and I felt that we need to keep him on the IV for at least another 24 hours - to feel that we have done all that we could. The kidney specialist in Ohio agreed that 2 days is warranted - saying "sometimes it takes a bit longer to start seeing a response, although frequently that first 24 hours is when we see the biggest improvement.". We still have not gotten back the urine culture, so we do not know if there is an infection, and the ultrasound was inconclusive

To be honest I am scared - I am terribly afraid that this is the beginning of the end. He was stable for 2 years from when we first saw anomalies in his blood work - and now he seems to be deteriorating quickly. I am not ready for this, but will do all that I can to keep him happy and painfree. It is hard because to those who do not know him, he seems fine - but to those that do know him, it is clear he is not himself.

No matter what the results, I will pick him up tomorrow. I will take what I can get with him - but it's hard to fight back the tears.

Will keep you apprised.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Oh Lennap, I was hoping Remy would have turned a corner, However, the fact that they are still treating him with IV fluids shows that he may turn a corner yet. I know a woman who's border collie spent 5 days in ICU at Tufts for kidney failure and turned the corner and came through. I realize this is a completely different situation and Remy has been battling the the kidney problem for some time now, but there is still the chance the urine culture results will show an infection that can be treated aggressively. 

I know exactly what you mean when you say that he is not himself and maybe its not that obvious to others. Chance has the ability to rally and seem okay even when he has been "under the weather". I won't get into it here, but Chance has been through several health crises and I have learned that my being positive is important for him. Remy knows you (and reads you) as well as you read him. Your worry will be felt by him. Just what you need - I know - but a least when you are home with him be positive and cheerful.

The other thing is he may rally once you get him home. Chance was in the hospital (for an operation) earlier this year. When we arrived to bring Chance home, the tech could not believe how upbeat and happy he became. She actually got some of the other techs to witness his happiness because they were feeling so bad for the depressed Golden. He was just homesick and missing us. Probably wondering if the hospital was where he would be forever. I felt SOOO bad but he needed to be there. Once he came home, he was so relieved I'm sure.

I will continue to pray for Remy.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

Sending good thoughts for you & Remy both



Lennap said:


> Well this week has been pretty sucky so far - Remy had a seizure in daycare on Tuesday - we were already scheduled to see his Vet that evening for his acupuncture, so while there we drew blood. The results came back AWFUL. His kidney values are through the roof! He is now at the Animal Medical Center on IV drip to try to clean the toxins out of his blood - and hopefully find out what is going on.
> 
> The bizarre thing is that the values are so bad, that no vet understand why he is not lethargic and why is appetite is so good. Any other dog they have seen with such high kidney values has been in end stage renal failure. So once again we are all saying WTH?!
> 
> ...


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks for your support - this afternoon brought a new turn of events. Apparently Remy became subdued to the point that it was obvious to the staff at AMC so they did a chest xray. Yup he's got pneumonia. This is not unusual for Remy, but all I could think was why does all of this happen to my poor boy?! The intern (who I am not a very big fan of) told me they were switching his antibiotic and putting him on nebulization and at this point there was no choice that had to keep him. I thanked her and called my regular vet.

Thank goodness I did because he was quite pleased with this news - apparently this is good because it gives us something to fight, and introduces a new possible cause for the kidney issues. So once again I again I am praying for better results on the kidney panel in the morning. If they are better I will probably leave him there another day trying to get the level back to where they have been.

So now I have to figure out if I should visit him in the hospital. G-d knows I want to!!!!! But I am afraid of his not understanding why I am walking away. I am also concerned that he will get overly excited seeing me which is not good for his recovery. I welcome any and all input on this question.

Thanks all!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

I am encouraged that you are getting some answers which will put Remy on the road to recovery!

I too wanted to visit Chance when he was in the hospital. The tech who was working with us discouraged this for the very reasons you mentioned. However, this recent time, Chance was only there for 2 days. I took her advice and didn't visit. 

If Chance had been there longer, I think I would have visited.

Here's what I would consider. If you could stay with him for a while, maybe in a space where you could just sit and hold his head and be next to him, I think I would do it. I wouldn't do it if you are only able to stop in briefly and then have to leave. This might leave him wanting and be tougher on him. But if you could basically stay for the day this would comfort him with your presence. At the end of that time, maybe leave when they feed him dinner or if he is getting tired. When leaving, say something he hears regularly when you leave and come back. I think pneumonia makes them feel pretty tired so he might remain quiet/calm after the initial greeting when you come in.

Maybe ask your regular vet who knows Remy better than the AMC staff.

I will continue to pray for complete recovery for Remy.


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## Harleysmum (Aug 19, 2014)

Hoping for some good news for dear Remy. It is so hard to know what is best when they are hospitalised.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

I try to visit several times a day when my dogs are hospitalized -- I feel it helps them know I am still there and will always come back ... and they tend to rally when they see me. I just sit and cradle them as we spend time together. 

But that is me.

Sending good thoughts that the pneumonia clears quickly and he comes homes bouncy & well to you soon.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks everyone, I am up, showered and dressed waiting for the hospital to call with an update. On the one hand I want him back with me so desperately on the other hand I know if I bring him home today he will not be getting better and it will basically be hospice care - so I am PRAYING for better renal panel results today.

I know the pneumonia will resolve, poor Remy has had it often enough. It's the kidney's that are scaring the pants off of me. 2.5 years ago I was told he was terminal - and I searched high and low for alternatives. I am so very grateful for the extra time I have had with him, but it is just not enough. I am selfish - I need him with me.

Not sure if I ever posted this but Remy is not named for a French person, or the cognac - remy means remedy in Latin. When I got him I was going through a terrible break up, and he was going to be what fixed me - and of course he did. I only wish I could fix him!

I'll post back when I get an update. Once again thanks for understanding.


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Oh, man. What a hard few days. I am sending you tons of positive thoughts. If anyone can fight back, it's Remy. I really hope it was the pneumonia causing the other issues and that he gets over that soon. 

I would definitely go to visit. I think they understand when you leave them there. They know something is not right with them. But I think seeing you will be only positive. And when you leave, say the words you normally say when you go out and leave him, so he'll know you'll be back. Give him a big hug from me.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Finally and thankfully some hope! Remy has started to respond to the treatment and his kidney values have come down a bit. I am leaving him there one more day to continue the treatment in the hope that the values return to where they had been before.

Thank you for your support and your prayers, please keep them coming we are not out of the woods yet!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Way to go Remy!!!

Remy must be a fighter and have a strong constitution. He certainly has the love and support. A perfect team.

Such wonderful news - never give up. Your instinct to keep him at AMC one more day (2 days ago) was good. I think the specialists can see how much Remy is cherished and that works to his behalf. 

Prayers and good thoughts coming your way!


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

That's such a relief! I've been rather worried about him. (I know, it's a bit silly to worry about somebody else's dog, but never mind the logic!) Hope he's home soon.


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## tikiandme (May 16, 2010)

Sending out good thoughts to Remy and you. I hope he is much better tomorrow and can come home with you. I know how hard it is, I've been riding the "roller coaster", too. Give Remy a big hug from my boy, Cosmo, and me.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Once again I sit here waiting for the hospital to call - but today I know I will be picking him up! I am on pins and needles. These have been the longest 3 nights I can remember. I have not trusted anyone to take care of Remy since his diagnosis - so these have also been the first 3 nights in 2.5 years that we have been apart. 

Can you tell I WANT MY BOY BACK?! I have done all my errands for the day and the last load of laundry is in the dryer, so when I get him back, it is all about HIM! He is so going to be sick of me hugging him.

I know he won't be with me forever, but holy heck I'm not even close to ready to lose him - and will continue to do everything in my power and within my means, to keep him with me happy and relatively healthy.

And yes the tears are flowing again. OY


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## Anon-2130948gsoni (Apr 12, 2014)

Sending a huge hug...he's such a lucky boy to have you in his corner.

You'll both feel better once he's home.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

So true - I am the same way so I get it totally. Chance has had health problems all his life and on several occasions, he had to be overnight without us for treatment or recovery. I am SO uneasy without him.

But today is a good day and I just know Remy will rally when he is back in his happy home.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Got the call, it was not good. Remy had a seizure overnight and was moved to ICU - on the one hand I am devastated that I was not with him, on the other hand I know he was where he needed to be.

Needless to say he will not be coming home today, they will be running a boatload of more tests - it is unlikely he will be home before another 2 days or so. 

I am going to visit him this afternoon. Need to figure out how to stop crying before then. 

So much for having hope, crap this just sucks, I feel so helpless.


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## Anon-2130948gsoni (Apr 12, 2014)

Oh, I'm so sorry. Sending hopes and hugs your way.


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## tessmk (Aug 30, 2015)

I've just finished reading your thread for the first time. I am so sorry that you are all going through this anguish. I know it's easier said than done, but don't give up. Our thoughts and prayers are with you; both Quinsy and I are sending positive and healing vibes your way.


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Oh, no! I read your first two updates and was ready to write PHEW - yay Remy! I'm so sorry to read the last post. I hope they can figure out what is going on. Poor boy. He'll feel much better just seeing you, though. Hugs to you both. This must be so hard.


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## Harleysmum (Aug 19, 2014)

I was the same - all ready to say Hooray he's coming home. So sorry he has to stay but as you say he is in the right place. Hopefully you will find out more when you visit today. I know how empty the house is when they are not there.


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## aesthetic (Apr 23, 2015)

I'm so sorry, I just finished reading your new updates and was really hoping Remy would make a great recovery.He's such an amazing boy, he's got a wonderful family behind him. Kaizer and I are sending our love and thoughts to you and your boy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks everyone, went to see him and he looks good - but holy cow once he saw me he was not willing to move more than 3 inches from my side! Part of him had to be touching me at all times. It was heart breaking to leave him again, he is such a good boy - he knew what was coming, tried to resist by laying flat on his belly, but eventually let them lead him away. This time I brought a crate liner for him, and a nylabone - hopefully the smells from home on the create liner will make it more bearable for him.

Basically they know what is causing the seizures - his clotting factor is in overdrive. This is not unusual with dogs who have his kind of kidney disease (Protein Losing) but has never been an issue for him until now. So now he is on anti seizure meds, which is not easy since most can harm kidneys but he is on an ok one. In all likelihood I will be able to take him home tomorrow. Fingers crossed.

So my new dilemma is how do I handle this? I am convinced the pit bull attack set this whole acute episode off. There is a limit to what the body can deal with all at once - and poor Remy was dealing with way too much, it went into overdrive. I have been pretty ok so far in dealing with the whole event, but now that my bills are over $6,500 I am wondering if I can ask the daycare's owner if her insurance will over it. It is a slippery slope because I want to be able to continue going there, but this is a lot of money!

I figure I'll first discuss it with my vet and see if he agrees with me (which I would doubt - but going to try regardless) - but would welcome any and all thoughts on the subject. I am not looking to screw anyone over here - but I don't want to be the one screwed over either.

Once again, and always - thanks everyone!


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

You must be beside yourself with worry right now. It's good that Remy will be able to come home soon, but I know that won't end your worries or help your exhaustion. He is so very lucky to have you and I'm sure he will be thrilled to be home again.

I'm especially sorry that Remy has had a seizure and needs to be on seizure medications. Here's a sticky thread that has a lot of information about things to watch for when a dog has seizures: http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com.../108429-seizures-101-basic-information-7.html. Stairs are dangerous for seizure dogs, given the risk of falling during a seizure. We put baby gates across the stairs in our house to keep Charlie and Joker off them. Any pool of water, from puddles to fish ponds to even the smallest of swimming pools, is also dangerous; it doesn't take much water to drown a dog who is having a seizure. It's also a good idea to remove heavy objects that might fall on Remy if he bumped into a table during a seizure.

There are lots of different seizure meds, some with far fewer side effects than others. These drugs can be very expensive, but there are some discounts available. Coupons from GoodRx.com cut the cost of Joker's generic Keppra almost in half and made it affordable, which it would not have been otherwise.

Holding Remy and you in my thoughts and prayers...


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Oh I am so sorry to hear Remy had a seizure and cannot come home yet. I believe there are so positive aspects that you can focus while you are going through this terrible time.

Remy is absolutely in the right place. Just the access you have to top notch veterinarians at AMC - specialists in every area - is a huge benefit to Remy. They have been pretty quickly identifying and treating each of Remy's problems and Remy doesn't have to be shuttled back and forth from primary vet to specialist here and there - better for him. Plus, here's another big plus: they know why he had the seizure and there is medication for it!

Also, now that you visited him, Remy knows you are coming back and this lifted his spirits. 

It will work out. When you have a team of top notch doctors working together, you at least know you Remy is getting the best care available.

The dilemma part is a tough one. It is a lot of money and it's not done yet. I agree with you totally but it will not be an easy case to prove. Even if Remy's daycare provider is willing to put in a claim, her insurance company may fight it. And even if your veterinarian testifies to the fact that the attack triggered and set off this chain of events, this cause-and-effect will be subject to scrutinizing by the insurance company. It's possible that they would consent to punctures and wounds due to the attack, but I doubt the kidney part of it. I hate to say this but because Remy's kidney problem was a pre-existing condition, the insurance company will surely grab onto this and deny any of the kidney treatment. 

If a claim is put in - even if it's denied - your daycare will now have a claim on their record and it may cause them to suffer some financial consequences - possibly higher premiums. Or if they have had previous claims, possibly lose their coverage from this insurance company. 

Talking to your vet before you make a decision is a good idea. Then depending on your relationship with the daycare owner, maybe you could feel it out with them. I just can't see how this would go well for staying with this daycare if you decide to put a claim in. Maybe I'm too pessimistic but insurance companies will try to find a legitimate reason not to pay if possible. It would take too long to explain the story here but Chance had insurance since he was 8 weeks old and no pre-existing condition and VPI found a way to deny his heart operation ($$,$$$). I was so wrapped up in just getting him well - the way you are with Remy - I decided I would deal with it later. When later came, there was just NO way they would pay so I just moved on. 

Think about it. Maybe even consult with an attorney first - just for an opinion whether there is legal merit and if you have a good chance of winning a claim.

This is SO hard and such an added burden. I totally understand and wish there was an easy answer but this is a tough one. 

Praying that Remy has a peaceful night and you get good news when you call AMC.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

GoldensGirl said:


> .....
> There are lots of different seizure meds, some with far fewer side effects than others. These drugs can be very expensive, but there are some discounts available. Coupons from GoodRx.com cut the cost of Joker's generic Keppra almost in half and made it affordable, which it would not have been otherwise.
> 
> Holding Remy and you in my thoughts and prayers...


Thank you GoldensGirl for mentioning the discounts that are available for the medications. I use the AAA prescription discount program for Chance's meds and it has save me probably thousands over 9+ years.

Here is the link to the thread with the info:

*http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com...lden-refuses-eat-anything-16.html#post5985250*


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

goldy1 said:


> I use the AAA prescription discount program for Chance's meds and it has save me probably thousands over 9+ years.


Yes, there are multiple discount programs. I priced Joker's meds using the AAA discount and also the GoodRx coupons. GoodRx almost always gave us better discounts and doesn't require a membership of any kind.


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

I'm so sorry to read about Remy's latest health scare. Will the vet work with you on a payment plan? I tend to agree you might have an uphill battle with the preexisting condition (but am not a legal expert by any means). I know at my daycare, the contract they force all clients to sign releases them from liability because you have to acknowledge the risk of daycare. I think it's pretty standard.

I'm sending a big hug your way that Remy starts making more progress and gets to come home and be with you tomorrow.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thank you everyone for your continued support. I did not know about these potential discounts for drugs, I will absolutely check them out!!! I am spending a fortune on his meds to date.

I know it is a slippery slope with the daycare - I am not saying I cannot pay the bill, I am saying I don't think I should have to bear the full brunt. At this point I think I am at about $7,000 for this episode - that is in less than 3 weeks!

I have no interest in losing my relationship with the daycare, but they did screw up! This dog was known to not like Remy - and the worker went through the gate between the two dog runs, instead of going around. The pitbull snuck in behind her and attacked, attacked, attacked. The funny thing is the daycare owner really is so clueless as to think it is the pitbull owner's responsibility - excuse me but both dogs were under your care!

I will discuss with my Vet - and figure out my next steps - I know NJ does not allow punitive, but I am not seeking punitive - I just want to be made whole.

UGH I hate this kind of stuff! Bottom line I want my pup back!!!!!!! I miss him. 

XO to all of you!


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

What a difficult few weeks you both have had. Hang in there, you are strong. It sounds like your visit today with Remy was positive so things are moving in the right direction. Hugs... 

This line is very sweet " ...once he saw me he was not willing to move more than 3 inches from my side! Part of him had to be touching me at all times."

Keeping you both in my thoughts.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Lennap and Remy*

You and Remy are in my prayers!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

It can feel so overwhelming when it's all happening at once. I hear you about wanting the daycare to claim, but goldy1 makes a lot of good points about the potential consequences of one. 

Has the daycare offered to help cover any of the costs, seeing as it was their error that allowed the attack to happen? Maybe there's no need to involve insurance, but seems they should compensate somehow. 

I really hope Remy can come home soon. He will feel much better when he's back with you.


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## Jessie'sGirl (Aug 30, 2010)

Just updating now, can't believe all that has happened in the past little while. Poor Remy. Hugs to you both.


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## Buddy's mom forever (Jun 23, 2011)

Wow, it is just too much for both of you. Hope you get your boy back soon. Sending good vibes and hugs.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Look who is finally home - he was so excited - he ran up to the bedroom, hopped on my bed and passed out. When I climbed on with him, he stuck his nose in my hip and started snoring. So glad to have my boy home!

I wonder how long it will be before I feel I can relax and not worry about seizures?!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Hooray !!!!!

Remy is right where he is happiest. This is such good news. 

Try not to worry about the seizures too much. He is on medication for seizures now and he wasn't when he had one at AMC. You will probably worry but hopefully each day a little less.

Get some rest with your boy now!


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## tikiandme (May 16, 2010)

I'm so glad Remy is home with you where he belongs!


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

So glad to see he's home


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*



Lennap said:


> Look who is finally home - he was so excited - he ran up to the bedroom, hopped on my bed and passed out. When I climbed on with him, he stuck his nose in my hip and started snoring. So glad to have my boy home!
> 
> I wonder how long it will be before I feel I can relax and not worry about seizures?!


I am so glad that Remy is home and hope that you two can get some much needed rest. I think WORRY is a dog parent thing!!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Remy slept very soundly, snuggled right into me the whole night which he never does - typically if he feels me on the bed he either goes as far away from me as possible, or gets off entirely. I was up and down checking on him - but still feel better rested than I have since he was admitted.

I am working from home today so I can be with him - tomorrow is soon enough to return to daycare!

Take care all!


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

Yay!! Great news that he is back home with you


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

Yeah!! First thing I checked this morning to see how Remy and you were. So glad he's home. It's a good day when you can spend it with your Golden.


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## Jessie'sGirl (Aug 30, 2010)

So glad Remy is back home.


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

So happy to see he is back home with you. And that you are able to be home with him today. I hope he is on the road to recovery.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*

Checking in on sweet Remy and you!


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

OMG I am so sorry for what you and Remy have been through. I have not been able to be on here for a while and I came to check on Remy. I hope he is still doing well at home and snuggling in bed with you!!


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Lennap said:


> Look who is finally home - he was so excited - he ran up to the bedroom, hopped on my bed and passed out. When I climbed on with him, he stuck his nose in my hip and started snoring. So glad to have my boy home!
> 
> I wonder how long it will be before I feel I can relax and not worry about seizures?!


I'm so glad to see that Remy is at home with you and enjoying snuggles!

Having cherished two Goldens who had seizures, I'm not sure we ever stop worrying about them. Vets generally consider seizures to be "under control" if a dog has only one _grand mal_ seizure in a month, which is not reassuring to most of us.

Enjoy your boy!


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## CAROLINA MOM (May 12, 2009)

Lennap said:


> Look who is finally home - he was so excited - he ran up to the bedroom, hopped on my bed and passed out. When I climbed on with him, he stuck his nose in my hip and started snoring. So glad to have my boy home!
> 
> I wonder how long it will be before I feel I can relax and not worry about seizures?!


This is so wonderful to read, enjoy having your boy back home, try to relax and enjoy every second. 

My thoughts are with you both.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Remy has had a tough week - he has just not felt well and has been quite a bit needy. I am afraid he is a bit traumatized that I left him at the hospital - I've never left him anywhere but daycare before. I think that coupled with not feeling well had him being especially needy/clingy to me.

Happy to report however that he seems to have turned a corner - yesterday he woke up much brighter and less mopey. He is still off his food - but I am hoping that will resolve one he is done with the antibiotics. I think he is also playing me a bit - he knows if he doesn't eat at first I will begin offering other things until we find something he will eat that meal.

Deep heavy sigh - what will I not do for this dog?!


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Lennap said:


> Happy to report however that he seems to have turned a corner - yesterday he woke up much brighter and less mopey. He is still off his food - but I am hoping that will resolve one he is done with the antibiotics. I think he is also playing me a bit - he knows if he doesn't eat at first I will begin offering other things until we find something he will eat that meal.
> 
> Deep heavy sigh - what will I not do for this dog?!


This is such familiar place. Remember that an injection of vitamin B-12 can help improve the appetite of a dog and also give him a boost of energy. 

They do know how to play us, don't they? Especially when it comes to getting a preferred food. We sometimes tried as many as 6-8 offerings for Joker. That comes with loving them so much.

Hoping you and Remy have a better day and week ahead...


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> This is such familiar place. Remember that an injection of vitamin B-12 can help improve the appetite of a dog and also give him a boost of energy.
> 
> They do know how to play us, don't they? Especially when it comes to getting a preferred food. We sometimes tried as many as 6-8 offerings for Joker. That comes with loving them so much.
> 
> Hoping you and Remy have a better day and week ahead...


Actually my vet gave him a shot of B-12 last Tuesday - didn't do very much at all. But he did eat about two thirds of his dinner Friday, half his breakfast yesterday and perhaps the same this morning.

At the moment the preferred dining option seems to be chicken nuggets, so guess who ran out to buy three bags this morning?! Yes I am that idiot!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Lennap*

Lennap: I would buy the Chicken Nuggets, too!! As long as he eats, that's the main thing!!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*

Checking in on sweet Remy and you!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

I went out with friends last night for dinner and brought home left over steak for Remy. He gobbled it up! Proof that he is clearly holding out for better food! Ugh this dog is going to be the death of me and my wallet!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*



Lennap said:


> I went out with friends last night for dinner and brought home left over steak for Remy. He gobbled it up! Proof that he is clearly holding out for better food! Ugh this dog is going to be the death of me and my wallet!


Remy has GOOD TASTE!! Guess you'll have to buy more steak. So glad he enjoyed it!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Sorry I have been remiss in updating - it's been a fairly rough time. The good news - Remy has decided he well eat chicken nuggets tyvm so please make sure you have them ready every day 2 or 3X a day.

The not so good news, we rechecked his blood and his values are going back to where they were before he was admitted to the hospital. Conventional medicine has basically said there is nothing more they can do for him - and they do not understand why he remains a happy albeit subdued goofball - any other dog with his renal panel would be doing very poorly. So my boy remains a mystery.
]
I've discussed options with my Vet - and while we are not giving up - I have made it clear that all I care about is giving him the best possible life - and when that stops, we will need to do the right thing.

So now we will start with various Chinese medicine options - and up his acupuncture and see where that takes us.

I am sorry I don't post often - but every time I think about it I start to cry - and that is not good for either one of us. I find myself being very reluctant to go out - I don't want to miss a moment with him - hopefully my next post will be more positive.

Best,
Lenna


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

Lord, that dog of yours is a fighter, isn't he?! Although his test results aren't good, at least he can't read them! I'm glad you've found something that'll tempt his appetite. Long may it continue in the New Year.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Remy is a fighter and just wants to be happy with you. The two of you will fight together!! I understand exactly how you feel about not wanting to go out for fear of missing time with your boy. Enjoy all moments with no regrets!!!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Lenna*



Lennap said:


> Sorry I have been remiss in updating - it's been a fairly rough time. The good news - Remy has decided he well eat chicken nuggets tyvm so please make sure you have them ready every day 2 or 3X a day.
> 
> The not so good news, we rechecked his blood and his values are going back to where they were before he was admitted to the hospital. Conventional medicine has basically said there is nothing more they can do for him - and they do not understand why he remains a happy albeit subdued goofball - any other dog with his renal panel would be doing very poorly. So my boy remains a mystery.
> ]
> ...


Lenna: I completely understand how you feel. You and Remy are in my prayers!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

So sorry to see this latest update. My heart goes out to you. He certainly is a strong guy. I know how much you love him and he loves you. You'll make the right decisions for him. Sending you positive thoughts.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Glad you posted - have been thinking about Remy a lot.
Wish it was better news but the fact that he is happy and eating is something to be grateful for. For unknown reasons, he is defying the odds.

It's hard to post when you are in the midst of a struggle and you are right to do all you can to stay optimistic and focused on the positives. I think you have all the right priorities and hope I keep my head as straight as you are doing.

I am praying for you and Remy to have many wonderful times in 2016.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Happy new year everyone. Remy continues to amaze me - he runs away from me when he sees me getting together his morning and evening pills (quite a handful) - but when I catch him he just opens his mouth for me. I think its a game.

The past few days Remy has been playing with his toys more than he has in a while - it makes me so happy to see his joy. Dare I hope that perhaps the herbs are making him feel better? 

As far as his eating goes - he's still not eating full meals. but he does eat a good portion of it. I've been cutting up his nuggets or whatever yummies I'm giving him and putting it on top of his kibble - in the hope that once the pump is primed he'll keep eating. Sometimes it works.

Last night I had company over for dinner - Remy LOVES company and one of our guests was seriously his favorite person in the whole wide after me. That person sat next to me, so he was able to sit under the table right by us and was in heaven! Needless to say I planned the meal around what leftovers Remy would be allowed to eat (ie no garlic chicken).

Here's praying that 2016 brings us ALL health, happiness and wealth.

G-d bless


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

I am glad that Remy continues to eat a bit and to play with his toys. This part of the journey is never easy.

Holding Remy and you in my thoughts and prayers, with warm wishes for Happy New Year.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

What good news ! The herbs takes longer but I definitely think Remy is feeling better due to them. He is such a good patient to take them for you. 

So cute how he was with his favorite people for new years. Chance loves company too. I think the entire combination of events is helping Remy. I believe in "priming the pump" too. It has worked for my cats who have had kidney failure.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*



Lennap said:


> Happy new year everyone. Remy continues to amaze me - he runs away from me when he sees me getting together his morning and evening pills (quite a handful) - but when I catch him he just opens his mouth for me. I think its a game.
> 
> The past few days Remy has been playing with his toys more than he has in a while - it makes me so happy to see his joy. Dare I hope that perhaps the herbs are making him feel better?
> 
> ...


Hoping and praying the herbs are making him feel better.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Just checking in on you and Remy. Hoping all is well!!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Happy lazy Sunday everyone. Remy is holding his own - he has begun to play with his toys, which he hadn't been doing for a while. He is also adjusting to his new siblings - I brought home two kittens I would say he is tolerating them well - but he knows who is boss and is not afraid to show it. Exactly as it should be!

We went for acupuncture on Tuesday and he had regained 2 of the 5 lbs he had lost, so I am freaking just a little bit less that he is only eating a fraction of his meals. I know he is playing me and holding out for better food, but I've decided that is his right. 

We go back on the 19th and will retest his blood to see if we are getting any benefit there from the herbals, I am praying we are, but am trying to convince myself that if we at least don't see things get worse it is good. I'm not quite buying it yet, but I am trying.

Once I see we are stabilized again, I am going to try to start taking him to his favorite places, at the moment I am afraid to go too far from his doctors but I want to do everything in my power to make sure he gets as much enjoyment out of life as he can. One of his very favorite things is running on the beach - which he does up in Rhode Island - my friend has a house up there that he lets us use. I am hoping to get up there a couple of weekends this spring. I would also like to take him back down to florida, who knows maybe we'll be able to do a long weekend in march or april.

Regardless of what happens, it is nice to be able to plan. Way better than a few weeks ago - so I will take it!

XO All


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

That's good to hear. Spoil that handsome Remy and enjoy your Sunday.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

This is good news. Things seem to have settled to a more normal routine which is wonderful. The weight gain is a good sign. Remy is smart about the food now - holding out for the really good stuff.

The kittens are entertainment too.

I am keeping good thoughts and prayers for Remy's next checkup!


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Would love to see a picture of Remy and his new siblings!!


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*



Lennap said:


> Happy lazy Sunday everyone. Remy is holding his own - he has begun to play with his toys, which he hadn't been doing for a while. He is also adjusting to his new siblings - I brought home two kittens I would say he is tolerating them well - but he knows who is boss and is not afraid to show it. Exactly as it should be!
> 
> We went for acupuncture on Tuesday and he had regained 2 of the 5 lbs he had lost, so I am freaking just a little bit less that he is only eating a fraction of his meals. I know he is playing me and holding out for better food, but I've decided that is his right.
> 
> ...


Glad to hear Remy is holding his own and it sure is his right to be picky about what he eats. The trips sound wonderful, but I bet Remy's favorite place to be is anywhere you are!


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Update - Remy is barely eating. Over the past two weeks his desire to eat has continuously decreased. To say the least I am freaked a bit. On the other hand his coat has never been better - go figure!

It did occur to me that the last time we put him on Chinese herbs he stopped eating after a while too - so now I have now stopped giving them in the hope that in the next few days he starts eating again. 

Either way we have an appointment on Monday with the Vet for acupuncture and I will bring it up with him then.

Never freaking ends!


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## murphy1 (Jun 21, 2012)

I just read about your guy for the first time today. I cannot imagine what you're going through. 
My questing is what is in or left out of a diet for kidney disease? Is there something you could add that would make the food more tolerable for him?


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

I've been adding chicken to his kibble. That used to get him to eat until the last day or two. I am sure I could up the ante to steak - but that is really not healthy for his kidneys.

I am really hoping and praying it's the Chinese herbs again. If not then it is a well known sign of the end stages of kidney disease. While his blood work would support that theory - he is not listless, quite the contrary he is still my happy boy.

Deep heavy sigh, who knows?!


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Lennap said:


> I've been adding chicken to his kibble. That used to get him to eat until the last day or two. I am sure I could up the ante to steak - but that is really not healthy for his kidneys.
> 
> I am really hoping and praying it's the Chinese herbs again. If not then it is a well known sign of the end stages of kidney disease. While his blood work would support that theory - he is not listless, quite the contrary he is still my happy boy.
> 
> Deep heavy sigh, who knows?!


How my heart aches for you and Remy. This path is all too familiar and there are no easy answers. For my two Goldens that had kidney disease, there came a point at which I decided to just let them enjoy the time left...to eat what they enjoyed and go to places where they were happy. It might have cost them some time, but there is more to life than fighting off death.

Enjoy your boy and build as many memories as you can. You have done so well for him - nobody could do better. 

Hugs and prayers for both of you.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> How my heart aches for you and Remy. This path is all too familiar and there are no easy answers. For my two Goldens that had kidney disease, there came a point at which I decided to just let them enjoy the time left...to eat what they enjoyed and go to places where they were happy. It might have cost them some time, but there is more to life than fighting off death.
> 
> Enjoy your boy and build as many memories as you can. You have done so well for him - nobody could do better.
> 
> Hugs and prayers for both of you.


Goldengirl I am afraid I am getting close to that point. If the experiment of stopping the Chinese herbs doesn't get him eating again, then I will know it is time to just let him have whatever he wants. I am not at all ready for that but all I an do is pray.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

This is so hard what you are going through. Good to know Remy is happy but the appetite issue is concerning. Has he lost weight? The fact that his coat is beautiful suggests he's getting the necessary vitamins and minerals. Also suggests good body functions. I think you are right and maybe you can get another idea on Monday from the acupuncturist.

Sending positive thoughts and prayers for you both.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

So sorry Remy is not eating well. I hope stopping the herbs will help. Thoughts are with you and Remy!!!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

This rollercoaster is so hard. I hope he decides to start eating today. Liverwurst was always a good temptation for Tesia. Tuna fish, too. Maybe Remy would like to try them, too. Hope he's doing better.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

We were out my friend's house last night and Remy gobbled down three chicken thighs and a drumstick, couldn't get enough. Today the little stinker refuses to eat again. I wonder if it is my cooking - always ate it before.

He is also being really pokey on his walks. He used to always walk ahead of me, ready to see what adventure awaits. Lately he has just been so slow. Of course if he saw someone he likes he perked right up to rush forward to say hello. 

I keep hoping he is just playing me, but I know in my heart dogs don't do that. I continue to pray this is something silly that we will get past. Wonder if I am in denial.

The other day I was chatting with the daycare owner - she commented that she cannot believe I have been going through this for nearly 3 years. I went home and realized I would give so much to keep going through it for many years to come! UGH!!!!!! Yes I cry a lot.


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Lennap said:


> ...He is also being really pokey on his walks. He used to always walk ahead of me, ready to see what adventure awaits. Lately he has just been so slow. Of course if he saw someone he likes he perked right up to rush forward to say hello.


Could something else be causing Remy to be pokey? Arthritis? Calcification of his spine? Low blood oxygen? Joker became anemic later in his life and it took vitamin supplements with iron and feeding him some liver to get him past it. Like Remy, Joker had kidney disease, so treatments involve choosing between evils...or goods. It's about trade-offs for quality of life.



Lennap said:


> I keep hoping he is just playing me, but I know in my heart dogs don't do that. I continue to pray this is something silly that we will get past. Wonder if I am in denial.


In my experience, *dogs absolutely do play us*! Charlie and Joker certainly played me to get the foods and services they wanted and I see Sunny doing it, too. They work to get what they want, like any intelligent being. 



Lennap said:


> The other day I was chatting with the daycare owner - she commented that she cannot believe I have been going through this for nearly 3 years. I went home and realized I would give so much to keep going through it for many years to come! UGH!!!!!! Yes I cry a lot.


I know exactly what you mean. I fought Sabrina's kidney disease for 5 long years and I would be fighting it still had the choice been left to me. But renal failure gets so ugly at the end...so very ugly. Denial is only human and of course you cry...you know what lies ahead. Ultimately, you will make choices in Remy's best interest, as you always have.

With you in spirit...


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## wdadswell (Dec 17, 2015)

I just caught up on this thread and I am so sorry for what you are going through. Remy has been through so much. I lost my boy to renal failure at 6 1/2. What saved me from going insane was joining the K9 Kidney Diet Forum. I learned so much about feeding a dog in kidney failure and the members were so helpful and supportive.

Sorry if I missed it, but do you give Remy daily fluids? I had to syringe feed my Tajji for the last 6 months of his life. If I hadn't, he wouldn't have eaten anything. It is a horrible disease and it's hard to watch them lose weight, with lack of appetite, but I wouldn't have traded those last 6 months for anything. We had a lot of good days and up until the end, he wanted to be here.

My thoughts and prayers are with you and Remy. Hoping you get a lot of good days too.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thank you everyone for your replies. Last night was our annual superbowl get together. It used to be a huge party with over 100 people, but once Remy got diagnosed I started limiting the crowd to just a few families - and then only people not afraid of dogs (so he didn't have to be tethered to me). It's always been one of the highlights of his year - he loves to entertain.

Last night he just couldn't stay up for it. He said hi to everyone and then laid down. When everyone went to get dinner, he put himself under the table so he would be close to everyone, but it never seemed to occur to him to steal food or beg. He basically stayed there under the table for the rest of the evening. Friends came over to lay on the floor with him and love on him - it broke my heart.

This morning he just wants to stay on the bed. He got up - went out side to do his business, but then really just wanted to come back to bed. He still wags his tail when he sees me, and wants to cuddle - he's in there!

I wonder if a B12 shot would help - I'll probably ask for more of those pills that stimulate their appetites. Not sure why I hadn't thought of that.

OMG I hope the Vet comes up with something later today. I am so not ready for this that I am terrified I won't do the right thing for him.

I am sorry for being so dismal - I just don't know where else I can say these things.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Remy*



Lennap said:


> Thank you everyone for your replies. Last night was our annual superbowl get together. It used to be a huge party with over 100 people, but once Remy got diagnosed I started limiting the crowd to just a few families - and then only people not afraid of dogs (so he didn't have to be tethered to me). It's always been one of the highlights of his year - he loves to entertain.
> 
> Last night he just couldn't stay up for it. He said hi to everyone and then laid down. When everyone went to get dinner, he put himself under the table so he would be close to everyone, but it never seemed to occur to him to steal food or beg. He basically stayed there under the table for the rest of the evening. Friends came over to lay on the floor with him and love on him - it broke my heart.
> 
> ...


What time is your appt. for Remy-will say a prayer!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Sending positive thoughts to you both. I hope the B12 helps.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks guys. I have him a dose of the appetite stimulant this am (mitz something or other) and took him for a walk. He was brighter than last night but still no pep in his step. But when we got home he ate over a cup of kibble iver which I had sprinkled a little liver. I am so grateful for that!

Our appointment is at 340 today thank you as always!


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

Been thinking about you today and hoping that your vet appointment was OK. 

"Friends came over to lay on the floor with him and love on him - it broke my heart."
I'm glad that your friends were able to spend some time with Remy -- how wonderful and special that they came over to love him... he has certainly touched many hearts.

As I was caring for my senior girl Merry, there was a time when I asked her human friends to come visit and they all did.... she was thrilled to see them, tail wagging and smiling.

I bet your friends being there yesterday made Remy happy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Still at the vet as suspected his kidney values are through the roof. They are giving him IV fluids and wanted to admit him to the hospital again. I have refused that because frankly I can't keep doing it to him, we know his kidneys will not get better so the negative outweighs the positive in my mind on hospitalization.

My vet acknowledged that we are running out of options. Yes I was sitting on the floor with Remy on my lap bawling my eyes out. 

On the other hand the IV fluids he got last time kept him stable for over a month. So we are going to try that today and again next Monday and see how we do.

I sure would appreciate whatever prayers you can spare for my boy. That he remains happy and comfortable and that I do the right things for him always.

Thanks


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## Jessie'sGirl (Aug 30, 2010)

Sending lots of prayers for you and your boy.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

You are doing right - no question! I would hesitate another hospitalization as well. IV fluids on an outpatient basis, that would be my choice too. As long as he can come home with you at night. The kidney values are your answer and it's amazing how well Remy is doing in spite of it.

I am praying hard that Remy rallies from the IV fluids and that the values go down. I am also praying for strength for you to be okay with all you are going through.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

goldy1 said:


> You are doing right - no question! I would hesitate another hospitalization as well. IV fluids on an outpatient basis, that would be my choice too. As long as he can come home with you at night. The kidney values are your answer and it's amazing how well Remy is doing in spite of it.
> 
> I am praying hard that Remy rallies from the IV fluids and that the values go down. I am also praying for strength for you to be okay with all you are going through.



Thanks I needed someone to agree with me. I got the feeling the vet thought my decision was financially driven, which is a factor but truly not even close to primary. 

Since Remy is now on hospice care, I am going to feed him whatever the heck he wants. So I ordered a nice big rib eye steak, tonight At first he showed no interest in leaving his bed to even check it out. I had to go over and tempt him with it, then he followed me to make sure he got to inhale every bite. Did my heart good to see him want to eat!!!!

I keep telling myself one day at a time, but it is honestly so freaking hard! Thank you so much for your support. Not sure where I would turn to if not for you guys!


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Goldens want to be with their people. Period. Being away from you in a hospital setting can actually set them back further. With Remy's recent hospitalizations, you know what is involved. Plus this is a chronic disease. 

Chance was in the hospital overnight in September. Only one night and I know he was depressed! When we picked him up, the tech who was doing the discharge with us wanted to bring the other techs in to see how happy Chance was. She said they were all feeling so sorry for the Golden who was so sad. It was a specialty center so it wasn't the techs he knows at our regular office.

Remy will do better with you. Love hearing the rib-eye steak story! This is good. Once he realizes steak is on his new menu, he may start hanging with you in the kitchen more. I hope so.


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

You and Remy have all the prayers I can spare. I hope he keeps eating.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

I also agree with no hospital. I think Remy prefers to be with you as much as possible. I hope IV fluids help. You will do all the right things for Remy as you always have!! Try to enjoy the time together...even if it involves crying and petting. My thoughts and prayers are with both of you!!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Continuing to send positive thoughts... I think you're making the right decision, too.


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

Sending prayers and hoping that Remy enjoys the special foods that you are preparing. I think keeping him with you is the right decision. He loves you and wants to be with you.


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## AngelCoopersMom (Oct 15, 2015)

My eyes just filled with tears as I read your posts. I am so sad to hear about Remy. When you said you were sitting on the floor in the vets office bawling it took me right back to when the vet told me about Cooper's tumor...I did the same thing. I could NOT get it together. These goldens are our kids. We love them just as much. I'm so glad Remy enjoyed his yummy food yesterday! Sounds delicious. Prayers to you, him, and the doctors. I hope he can stay with you happy and as healthy as can be for much longer. Hugs.


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Lennap said:


> ...Since Remy is now on hospice care...


This phrase is so painful to read and it must break your heart to write it. I wish I could put my arms around you and just give you shelter for a while.



Lennap said:


> I am going to feed him whatever the heck he wants. So I ordered a nice big rib eye steak, tonight At first he showed no interest in leaving his bed to even check it out. I had to go over and tempt him with it, then he followed me to make sure he got to inhale every bite. Did my heart good to see him want to eat!!!!


We did this with Joker last fall. One of our vets recommended cooking pork tenderloins for him. I gather that's easier to digest that beef. So we, who rarely cook for ourselves, cooked regularly for Joker. He also like rice cooked in chicken broth. That has the advantage of being low protein, so easier on the kidneys.



Lennap said:


> I keep telling myself one day at a time, but it is honestly so freaking hard! Thank you so much for your support. Not sure where I would turn to if not for you guys!


There is simply nothing harder than knowing that all you can do is love and spoil them. But try to save your tears for later and live in the moment with Remy...take photographs, bury your nose in his fur and soak up the smell of him, cherish his favorite toys, rub his belly and his ears, and try just be with him. I'm not very good at this myself, despite the best efforts of a lifetime with dogs, but they keep trying to teach me.

Hugs and prayers...


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thanks everyone - today started out only ok. Remy did not eat a bit this morning - but he was very happy to go to daycare and their reports were that he seemed ok.

Tonight again he did not want to eat. I offered liver, steak, pate and the only thing he would eat is challah rolls. 2 of them to be exact and then he was done. Deep heavy sigh.

He seems happy - but we shall see. My vet wants me to bring him in a leave him for a full day to get more iv fluids. I am trying to figure out what that will buy us - it's certainly not where he wants to spend his time. I keep asking why we can't do sub fluids - but he seems opposed to it.

I'll keep thinking about it - and praying for divine intervention


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## tikiandme (May 16, 2010)

Thinking of you and Remy, and wishing you strength to get through this...It's such a hard road.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

All he would this morning is two more challah rolls but I put it on top of his kibble so he accidentally got some of that too. 

I'm picking up cerenia today hopefully that will help.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

(( hugs ))


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

The other night someone told me that I don't have the emotional fortitude to deal with this, and she was very right. I brought Remy home from daycare early today, all excited to get the Cerenia into him and hopefully get him to eat tonight.

We got home and he got on his bed in my office while I worked. When I got up - he didn't not move - OMG - yes I began to freak out. He always follows me. I brought him roast beef - no interest. 

I burst into tears - got hysterical and called the vet. I basically have three choices here - give him more fluids, to buy a little time for ME, have him put down, or stay with him overnight and see what happens. I think I have come to the conclusion that #1 is too selfish - the fluids are not buying us enough time to put him through the process. That leaves 2 and 3.

He was fine at daycare today, when he saw me he got all excited, ran in circles and ran to get out to greet me. So then the vet said maybe that just exhausted him and he needs to rest and that he will rebound a bit. So I am staying in the office and letting him rest and praying ALOT.

The truth is I know I have far less time left with Remy than I had thought. I am devastated. I must say it is bizarre to me, he seems at peace with his current reality - I wonder if he knows. I hope he knows more than I do - and that there is really a better place out there, where he will be free of kidney disease. 

OMG I really am not emotionally equipped to deal with this.

Thanks for letting me rant.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

You are equipped and are handling the whole situation beautifully - especially coming to terms that #1 is not really an option.

I am an animal communicator and can hopefully set you mind at ease a bit - he _does_ know and animals (in general) have no fear in dying, that is a human thing - for animals death is a transition more than an end if that makes sense, part of the circle of life.

Remy knows you have done a wonderful, wonderful job of putting his health & needs first and trusts that you will continue to do so. 

Let him rest this night and hold him gently... 

My heart goes out to you, it is hard and will not stop being hard, but perhaps you can find some peace in the peace & love Remy feels. For whatever time the two of you have left, just keep his love for you foremost .. that will never die.



Lennap said:


> The other night someone told me that I don't have the emotional fortitude to deal with this, and she was very right. I brought Remy home from daycare early today, all excited to get the Cerenia into him and hopefully get him to eat tonight.
> 
> We got home and he got on his bed in my office while I worked. When I got up - he didn't not move - OMG - yes I began to freak out. He always follows me. I brought him roast beef - no interest.
> 
> ...


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

These times at the end test our love like no other. You will draw strength and courage from your love for Remy, as you always have.

Would your vet teach you to give Remy fluids subcutaneously? Needle-shy though I am, I learned to do that for my Sabrina. It wouldn't buy you much time, but it might buy you a couple of days. And Remy would be with you. Precious, precious hours.

If you decide to try this option, make sure your vet gives you something to help Remy sleep if things go bad in the middle of the night. That happened with Sabrina, after our vet made an afternoon visit to the house. Sabrina woke me at 4 a.m. and asked for help. I was ever so grateful that I had an escape hatch for her.

Trust yourself. You can do this. For Remy and for yourself.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

Saying a prayer that Remy has a good night and that you are doing okay. I also think you are doing an amazing job for Remy. No one could do better. Try to rest tonight.


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

What comes through in your posts on Remy is how very much you love him. Because of that, I've got no doubt you can deal with this. You will do what you always have done - you will look after Remy's best interests. And that is all you have to worry about. Hugs to you both.


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

Thinking of you tonight and hoping that Remy is resting and that you are holding him close. My prayers are with you.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Thinking of you and Remy. I understand you are freaking out, but you have done a fabulous job being a mom to Remy!!! Don't ever doubt that. He knows how great you are!! Thoughts and prayers continue!! Hugs to both of you!!


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## Harleysmum (Aug 19, 2014)

This is nonsense that you do not have the emotional fortitude to handle this. You have shown nothing BUT emotional fortitude! You have been a star. Just love on him like you always have. This is the hardest of times.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Sunrise said:


> You are equipped and are handling the whole situation beautifully - especially coming to terms that #1 is not really an option.
> 
> I am an animal communicator and can hopefully set you mind at ease a bit - he _does_ know and animals (in general) have no fear in dying, that is a human thing - for animals death is a transition more than an end if that makes sense, part of the circle of life.
> 
> ...




Thank you - I needed to know he is not scared and is prepared for what comes next. I know I am not but that is my problem not his.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> These times at the end test our love like no other. You will draw strength and courage from your love for Remy, as you always have.
> 
> Would your vet teach you to give Remy fluids subcutaneously? Needle-shy though I am, I learned to do that for my Sabrina. It wouldn't buy you much time, but it might buy you a couple of days. And Remy would be with you. Precious, precious hours.
> 
> ...


 I've been asking to do sub q fluids for months - no one felt there would be any benefit for Remy. I have done them before with a cat, so not all that scary to me. Just won't work for him.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Thank you to everyone, I am sorry I just can't respond to each individually. Remy rallied last night when a friend came over to love on him. He got up and went down three flights of stairs to be with her. He then went to the second floor (my main floor) had a good long drink and then stood at the bottom of the stairs to the third floor as he always has to say come on Mom time for bed. He then jumped on my bed (really high) and took his place. OMG I was so thrilled!

He woke up at 1:30 needing to go out - came in and collapsed on his bed on the first floor. He has not moved or had a drink since. He simply refuses to move.

I've canceled my meetings and will be at the vet at 8 am. I want to run the blood work one more time to confirm that he is done. But his actions are certainly saying that. On the other hand his coat has never been so soft and lush and his tongue is actually pink today (it's been whitish gray for quite a while now) so I need confirmation.

I want to do what is best for Remy - but I can't help but think that has always been keeping him with me! I do NOT have the emotional fortitude to deal with this. I am crying my eyes out.


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## tikiandme (May 16, 2010)

It's okay and a perfectly natural reaction to be crying your eyes out. I am crying my eyes out for you, too. You have always done what was best and what is needed for him. You have never waivered. You have always supported him no matter what. To me, that is the very definition of fortitude. Always remember that....


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## murphy1 (Jun 21, 2012)

We've all been in your situation and know it's heartbreaking. You love him so much i'm sure you'll make the best decision,,,,the one that puts him first, however difficult it may be. Bless you for taking such good care of him.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

Emotional fortitude does not mean you don't cry, or rant, or scream. It means you hurt but still do what is best.

And you, most certainly do  no stiff upper lip needed but the ability to push through your pain and anger and disappointment and even fear.

You are a strong person and the depth of your love shines through, if you did not love so deeply it would be easy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

Remy succumbed to his kidney disease this morning, peacefully in my arms. He fought to stay with me, but in the end his beautiful body could just not go on. 

My heart has broken into a million pieces. I'll post to the bridge section later - I can't pull it together now.


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## AmberSunrise (Apr 1, 2009)

I am sorry, so sorry. 

You gave Remy your final gift of love and ended his suffering. But you gave him so much for so long you will hopefully take comfort in knowing you kept him as healthy as possible for as long as you could and gave him a merciful release when you could no longer help him.

Fly free Remy.


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## SheetsSM (Jan 17, 2008)

I am so so sorry. I hope our support from afar can provide you comfort and strength to not only mourn your sweet boy but cherish and celebrate the life he did have, a life that he wouldn't have been able to have without you.


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## MaureenM (Sep 20, 2011)

I'm so very sorry. And thankful you were with him. My heartfelt thoughts to you.


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## Pilgrim123 (Jul 26, 2014)

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Nobody could have taken better care of him. RIP Remy.


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## murphy1 (Jun 21, 2012)

Sorry for your loss.....if you believe as i do you'll see him again.


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## Millie'sMom (Sep 7, 2012)

I am so sorry to read of Remy's passing. I am glad he felt loved until the very end. You took amazing care of him. Run free sweet boy.


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## Jessie'sGirl (Aug 30, 2010)

I am so very sorry. You've done all that was possible for Remy . Run free sweet boy.


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## goldy1 (Aug 5, 2012)

My deepest sympathy is with you. I hope the love you and Remy shared will help you through the dark days ahead. He is a saint and is looking down on you with everlasting love.


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## aesthetic (Apr 23, 2015)

I'm so sorry for your loss. You took amazing care of him, and I'm sure he knew how loved he was. Run free sweet boy.


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## Brinkleythegolden (Jun 18, 2012)

I am so sorry..run free, sweet Remy..


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

Remy had as many days, hours, minutes, seconds...as you could find a way to give him. No dog could wish to be loved and cared for more.

In my experience, the dogs we fight for the hardest are the ones we mourn the most deeply. They leave holes in our hearts, but also in our schedules...our lives. We build our lives around their needs, giving up other activities to cherish every moment with them. And then they are gone and we don't know what to do with ourselves. It takes time...sometimes a long time...to get back to anywhere near normal.

Cry. Scream. Rant. Eat a lot of chocolate. Have dinner with a friend who understands. Indulge in something fattening that makes you happy. Most of all, try to be gentle with yourself. And let us know how you're doing when you can.

Peace be with you, as it surely is with Remy.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Through the tears I want to tell you how very sorry I am for your loss of Remy. You two fought so very hard together. I was happy to read your post about him jumping up in bed with you. Hopefully that helps to comfort you that he was able to do that one more time before crossing to the bridge. I am also glad he was in your arms at the end. He will live in your heart forever!!! RIP sweet Remy....you will be missed!!!


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## Harleysmum (Aug 19, 2014)

You have been an amazing mum, absolutely amazing. RIP sweet Remy.


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## rooroch (Nov 7, 2012)

I agree with everything GoldensGirl said and could not have put it better. Very very sorry for your loss.


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## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Lennap*

I am so sorry to hear about sweet Remy. My dog Munchkin died of kidney disease in 2000 and will be there with all of our dogs to greet him at the Bridge. 

I added Remy to the 2016 Rainbow Bridge List.

http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com...8-2016-rainbow-bridge-list-2.html#post6320825


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Oh, Lenna. I am so sorry. I only saw your sad updates today. My heart is just breaking for you. He was such a special boy - loved you as much as you loved and relied on him. You were such a team. I'm so very sorry.


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## Jud (Aug 10, 2015)

So sorry for your loss ;(

Cara-Mia - 7/3-7/15 - Heart Forever Golden Girl


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## KKaren (Oct 29, 2014)

I'm so very sorry for your loss. Rest in peace Remy.


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## SandyK (Mar 20, 2011)

Thinking of you. I know this weekend is going to be very hard...as is every day for a long time.


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## 2tired (Oct 19, 2011)

Godspeed Remy. ((Hugs)) to mom.


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## Rookie's Dad (Feb 19, 2014)

So sorry for your loss, Remy will lots of good friends to play with. At least that's what I like to think, RIP sweet boy.


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## Lennap (Jul 9, 2010)

GoldensGirl said:


> Remy had as many days, hours, minutes, seconds...as you could find a way to give him. No dog could wish to be loved and cared for more.
> 
> In my experience, the dogs we fight for the hardest are the ones we mourn the most deeply. They leave holes in our hearts, but also in our schedules...our lives. We build our lives around their needs, giving up other activities to cherish every moment with them. And then they are gone and we don't know what to do with ourselves. It takes time...sometimes a long time...to get back to anywhere near normal.
> 
> ...


 You said this so accurately and well - I am bereft and beside myself. I don't know what to do with myself. 

All I can say is that this sux and I miss my boy deeply.


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