# Close to giving up



## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

I’m so grateful to have this forum with so many experienced Goldie owners and lovers!

I have a male Golden Retriever named Jay Jay who just turned 2 years old. We’ve had him since he was 8 weeks old. He is our beloved family pet. I have 2 teenager daughters 14 and 16. My 14 year old is my tom boy and an animal lover.

The 14 year old (who was 12 when we got him) has always rough housed with Jay Jay. She loves to wrestle with him as well as take his toy run around the house with him chasing her then when he gets close she throws it. She will also run up the stairs to her room yelling, Jay Jay running after her and slams her door. He will chase her and throw himself against the door scratching and growling. They also play outside in the backyard, but she does like to get him worked up. She loves to lay with him and rest her head on him and loves him to death. My husband and I let it go for a few minutes and then tell her to take him outside.

Jay Jay loves to pick things up for attention – trash, shoes, clothes and usually brings it to us. At 8 months old she tried to take a piece of trash out of his mouth and he bit her on the arm and hand. She screamed and he stopped. We told her not to take anything out of his mouth. We also had him in basic training learning sit, stay, leave it, come, wait, etc. He listened most of the time. Leave it was the hardest for him. He tends to get overstimulated and anxious.

About 7 months later my same younger daughter was playing with Jay Jay on our bed. She was lying on her back and Jay Jay was standing above her. She had him all worked up and kept grabbing his toy out of his mouth, hiding it. Then she would show it to him, throw it. He would go fetch it, jump back on the bed and round and round it went. Until he got fed up and went after her. This time is was really bad. It was an attack. She screamed and he did not get off of her until the rest of the family came running up screaming his name. She had multiple puncture wounds on her hands. I considered giving him away, but was told we can work with a behaviorist and get through this. We worked with a vet who specializes in Behavior Medicine. She gave us medication to help calm Jay Jay and my daughter stopped most of the previous behavior I mentioned above. 

Another 7 months later, just recently my younger daughter had Jay Jay worked up by playing with him late at night because she was excited for her trip the next morning. Jay Jay was up about 45 minutes after he normally settles for bed. He had been humping most of the family frequently that week. This night after playing and humping her multiple times she was on the floor arranging her shoes in her closet. He jumped on her to hump her and she shoved him off and yelled at him. He went after her. Again very bad, attacking, multiple puncture wounds on her hands and leg. She was screaming and it didn’t stop. We all came running up screaming and he was afraid and growled at my husband and other daughter. He looks up to me and has bonded with me the most so I calmly told him to come with me which he did. I put him in the garage so we could get her to the ER. At this point I’m ready to get rid of him. 

About 5 days have gone by and he seems normal again. Very loving and happy to the whole family. I’ve tried to minimize the contact between my daughter and Jay Jay. We had an excellent trainer come to our house and told us we can absolutely work with and give him firm obedience training. Obviously we have stopped all running through the house, screaming, taking things from him, rough housing, etc. We’ve been calm and loving and given him firm commands. I think we might be able to turn this around. We are also going to, as a family watch dog behavior videos and work hard to all be on the same page with training him. We’re going to remain calm around him and not rile him up, only play outside with his toy that he will drop first before we throw it. Also we will continually have the trainer come to the house.

Also we are planning on getting him neutered ASAP.

Sorry this is so long! Any thoughts would be welcome.


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

No rescue will take this dog now that he has caused puncture wounds. If you rehome him you will need to disclose this. It is a liability. If you do not disclose this, rehome him and someone else gets bit, they can come after you.

This is serious. All people who interact with him should follow strict protocols. No rough housing. PERIOD. EVER. Your daughters are risking getting bit every time they rough house with him. You cannot allow this to happen ever...if you had taught him (and them) fair trade, you may have avoided the bites.

Your options for rehoming him are limited. If you don't wish to euthanize him (humanely), you need to put some rules in place. Neutering him is not going to solve your problem.

If you are serious about helping your dog please reach out to someone who is specialized in resource guarding. Management and teaching fair trade are the best way to turn this around. I get worried when I read the word "firm" in your comment. If you utilize aversive training with a dog who resource guards you are going to end up with a dog that bites without warning. A good book to read is "Mine". You can order it on Amazon.


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you for the suggestions. 

NO aversive training. Only positive reinforcement training. NO rough housing at all!! Or running in the house or yelling or getting him worked up. Just outside play with his toys and with him dropping it on his own first. 

Your picture is so sweet.


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## jennretz (Jul 24, 2013)

Goldielover123 said:


> Thank you for the suggestions.
> 
> NO aversive training. Only positive reinforcement training. NO rough housing at all!! Or running in the house or yelling or getting him worked up. Just outside play with his toys and with him dropping it on his own first.
> 
> Your picture is so sweet.



Thank you for the compliment. I love my boys 

Those are great steps that you have started. I had a dog (for a brief period of time) who resource guarded and I ended up rehoming her because she was attacking my other two dogs. It was stressful so I empathize with what you are going through. Your children's safety has to come first (as you know). I can imagine the feelings you have because it's apparent you love him. The only way to save him is with strong management practices (and even then mistakes will happen). Someone will forget. I didn't mean to sound harsh about his options, but the reality is you really are his best option. But you, he and your daughters need to be safe. If all parties involved agree to practice fair trade with him, no rough housing, etc. you might still be able to get somewhere here. But always keep the knowledge in the back of your mind that he can bite.


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## bigblackdog (Jun 14, 2013)

Neutering will take the testosterone levels down....and along with strict boundaries and training....neutering may take him down a few pegs behavior wise. There are reasons why million dollar colts are gelded when they are too hard to handle. Testosterone plays a role in aggression...as does lack of training, and rules.

I agree he cannot be rehomed. To me it looks like a dog that was not an easy dog from the start...and was treating your daughter like a littermate. He "corrected" her when he did not like the way things were going, and was easily riled up...and all of the testosterone flowing....not a good combination.


Neuter him, work with a trainer and behaviorist...and give him way less freedom. Implement NILIF in his life...with no special privileges, or extra attention...he must work and earn everything. If that does not work....then it's a one way trip to the vet.


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## Megora (Jun 7, 2010)

1. Your 14 year old daughter is way too old to be doing the stuff you described. The kind of behavior you describe is acceptable for a little kid, but the age she is - she could be the one working with the dog and doing obedience training, feeding him, walking him, and doing a variety of other things that will help him learn to see her less as a littermate to roughhouse with and more like his "person" who he relies on. Having your daughter be more involved with more mature activities with the dog will help her relationship with the dog + will help her period. Most kids who grow up working with animals tend to be years more mature and level headed than their counterparts who are clowning around and babied by their parents. 

2. Obedience training is important. There was no mention of obedience training at all. And quite frankly that's more important than neutering your dog as soon as possible. And I don't care what kind of training you are doing, it's obviously not working. 

I have a 10 month old who is like bottle lightning. Meaning that he's super active and hyper and does all kinds of crazy stuff that makes us laugh (see thread I posted with him standing on our kitchen table), but he obeys every single person in my family. Even my 2 year old niece when she was visiting with her family for 2 weeks - she had this dog sitting and lying down on command and he did not grab anything from her or my 1 year old nephew. This is what you get with a good obedience program and Doing the Work. 

3. I'm actually less concerned about the hyperactive behavior of the dog - since it's clear about where it's coming from or what's causing it, and more concerned about two different statements. 

The dog is bonded with you the most. You want to get rid of him. 

If you are the one who the dog is bonded to the most and you don't want him - it would be better to place him.

Oh, and people talk a lot about "aversives" in training - but actually don't know what they are talking about. In this case, it sounds like an overstimulated dog who has no concept of manners. I would not go about pinning him (meaning you - because most people are all over the place with pinning and it turns into a wrestling/roughhousing game from the dog's point of view), but you need to exert yourself as boss with this dog. This means follow through and it means corrections because treats and praise mean nothing when your dog is overstimulated and going nuts on you. And don't fly off the handle about the evil of using corrections or "aversives". You threw the dog in the garage - that's a correction and a bit more scary to the dog than being grabbed by the scruff and dragged him down in a pin (which I would have done if I saw my dog doing what you described). And don't read books and watch you tube videos for training ideas because people make mistakes in translating what they see or read to actually doing with their dogs. Taking privates with a good trainer would be a lot more helpful. 

The problems you describe with the dog - they will go away in the 6 months to a year if you guys follow through and train this dog. Give him a job to do. And actually, with summer starting - this would be a good thing to set that 14 year old to work doing with him. A private instructor would work with your daughter and help her maintain control over the dog + communicate with your dog. I think it's pretty important for her long term anyway.


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Great thank you. I looked up NILIF and I know this will help as well with him as well as the behavior of jumping on us when we come into the house which no one likes!


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you for taking the time to be so through! 

I made the point that he’s bonded to me the most to try to paint a clear picture of the family situation. I said I wanted to get rid of him out of dire fear for my daughter being attacked again and feeling so much in the dark about this whole situation and not knowing what to do about it. 

It would break my heart to have to get rid of him. I’m starting to feel much better now that I had a private trainer come out to the house last night who seems to really understand dogs, their behavior, training through positive reinforcement, etc. He has trained all kinds of dogs including rescues and aggressive ones for the last 2 decades and his approach feels right and makes sense to us. The session last night went well and we will continue to work with him with obedience training. I’m also feeling better and more educated with the feedback I’m getting here! I’m really understanding our dogs complete lack of training by us and I am fired up to work with a trainer and the family is too. 

We didn’t really realize it and basically just kind of tolerated our dog doing what he wants most of the time. It was basically bad manners, but now I know he needs some serious training and it will be so much more pleasant to have a well behaved dog.

My 14 year old does walk and feed him, but she will be involved in his training and obviously no more rough play. I love how you put that: “that will help him learn to see her less as a littermate to roughhouse with and more like his "person" who he relies on. 

Thanks again for your advice! Your dogs are gorgeous.


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## DblTrblGolden2 (Aug 22, 2018)

Goldielover123 said:


> I’m so grateful to have this forum with so many experienced Goldie owners and lovers!
> 
> At 8 months old she tried to take a piece of trash out of his mouth and he bit her on the arm and hand. She screamed and he stopped. We told her not to take anything out of his mouth. We also had him in basic training learning sit, stay, leave it, come, wait, etc. He listened most of the time. Leave it was the hardest for him. He tends to get overstimulated and anxious.


^^^^ This part right here.... Your problem started when he was very young. He needs training. I'm not a huge believer that neutering him will change much. I do know that if you neuter him you will still have to be vigilant with training. My take on this situation would have been different. I wouldn't have stopped having my daughter take things from him. I would have made the puppy start to trade to get things. It was a warning sign of problems to come.

I would hire a private trainer immediately. Not one from PetSmart or Petco, but a reputable trainer with experience with Golden's. I would start by having him/her teach me how to handle the dog, and then when the trainer felt it was time I would have him teach my daughter to handle the dog. If she loves the dog and is playing with it she just needs to learn the appropriate way to play, and so does the dog. She could start practicing obedience and then teach him some tricks. It's really rewarding to watch progress with a dog while your training it.

I think it can be fixed with the right trainer and the right attitude from everyone involved. Until then I would keep him leashed to me when we were all at home. He would become my sole responsibility.

My 4 year old grandson can get my 13 month old Golden to sit, heal, place, and down. He loves "Place". It's the biggest game. He yells "Place" and Moe runs and gets in position and my Grandson laughs and laughs. He also knows that he doesn't take the dogs toys, and they don't take his....


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## ceegee (Mar 26, 2015)

I'll preface this by saying that what you have here isn't the type of problem that's going to be resolved only with advice given on the Internet, because none of us can actually see the nature of the dog-human relationship and the events that trigger the dog's behaviour. The trainer who comes to your home is in a much better position to help you.


Having said that, and based solely on your description of what happened, it's interesting to note that the three biting events involved only your daughter, and took place when your daughter had worked the dog up into a frenzy. What you describe in your post is a lot of loud human behaviour (yelling, screaming, slamming doors in the dog's face) and a lot of human behaviour designed to make the dog lose control (running away from him, chasing him, grabbing things out of his mouth, rough-housing, etc.). A dog in a frenzy is an out-of-control dog that isn't going to be respectful of the human who's got him that way; he's going to behave as he would with another dog in a similar situation, because instinctively that is what he's conditioned to do. And that includes biting to correct her or to get what he wants. I would venture a guess that this is a situation created to a large extent by your daughter's behaviour, and both she and the dog are now paying the price for it. The problem is, the price the dog will pay is likely to be a lot higher than the price your daughter will pay. He may lose his home and quite possibly his life because of it. If, by "puncture wounds", you mean that the dog has bitten hard enough to draw blood, it will be next to impossible to place him with another family.



It's good that you've stopped your daughter from behaving in this way with the dog - it will certainly help. More than that, though, as Megora points out, now that the problem has been created, it's vital for your daughter to change the nature of her relationship with the dog, and that means becoming involved in training him. Training doesn't just happen in classes or in sessions with an in-home trainer. It's a permanent state of affairs. It needs a shift in attitude by everyone concerned, along with an investment of time. When the trainer gives exercises, those exercises need to be practised - several sessions per day, every day - until the dog's behaviour becomes conditioned. There's no point in hiring a trainer if you don't follow through. For every hour with the trainer, you need to plan several hours of practice. There are no short-cuts to getting a well-trained dog. You have to put in the time. Your daughter is old enough to understand that she's been instrumental in creating this situation and that her dog's life may now depend on her willingness to make an effort with him.


Second, humping isn't related to the fact that your dog is not neutered. It's a training issue. The worst "humper" I know is a spayed female dog. Right now, based on your description, your dog seems to be running wild and treating your daughter like a littermate because that is how she treats him. Once you change the nature of that relationship, the humping is more likely to stop. Neuter him if you like, but it won't automatically eliminate the humping, nor will it automatically make a difference to the biting. The dog is not biting because he's intact, he's biting because he's out of control, and because he thinks he can get away with it.



I wish you good luck and truly hope that things work out for you and your dog.


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## jdavisryan (Jan 28, 2018)

I read your post this morning, and I've been thinking about it all day. I rarely post on subjects such as this and I'm sorry if I seem harsh, but I really believe that your dog is a victim in this situation too. Your daughter's behavior as you describe it seems antagonistic towards the dog, and the fact that you did liitle to intervene until it became a crisis saddens me. You've received some excellent advice here and I hope you'll take it to heart and pursue intensive, structure obedience training. I also hope that you'll monitor your daughtr's interaction with the dog closely and prevent her from provoking him again, ever. His life is at stake here. I've raised 2 sons and 4 Goldens, and I understand rowdy play. I also learned early on that it was my job to keep everyone, boys and puppies alike, safe and happy. Sometimes that meant separating the children and the dog until peace was restored and everyone was following the rules. You commented that your daughter "loves him to death" and that was chilling to me. I sincerely hope that statement isn't prescient, and that you can get this situation under control before he has to be euthanized.


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## GoldenDude (Nov 5, 2016)

I would neuter your Golden. No tea, no shade but it sounds like he has not had a lot of limits or expectations around behavior or obedience. The last thing you want is him deciding to leave your yard and sire a litter of puppies. I fear that could happen since he's not well trained or respecting boundaries. (Don't expect the neutering to change him. Simply expect the neutering to prevent him leaving your home and siring a litter of puppies.)


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## mylissyk (Feb 25, 2007)

I'm sorry, but I have to be honest here. You CAN NOT rehome this dog. He has inflicted 3 serious attacks on a child. Your options here are keep him or euthanize him. No rescue will take a dog with this bite history, and you can not pass this problem onto to anyone else.

I sincerely hope you do put in the work with a trainer to try and turn this around. That is quite literally his only hope of living. You absolutely do need everyone in the family on the same page, and learning about dog body language and communication is imperative to any success with this dog. But just learning about it is not enough, you have to apply proper handling, and NEVER allow the things your daughter was doing to happen ever again. She has to stop any and all activities with this dog that would in any way get him the very slightest bit excited. That means not even playing with his toy out in the yard with her. She can not be the source of any excitement. He will never be safe to live with if there is a hint of this treatment.

Run this by the trainer you are working with to be sure it's ok, but look up Nothing in Life is Free dog training on the internet and start applying those methods to everything he does all day long.


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## Otter (Feb 23, 2011)

Neutering him at this age won't change his behavior.

Barkley was our problem child. He never bit anybody though. He did attack Pebbles and did damage to her when she was a puppy. As a trainer once told us, "he's just a bully". He needed training and constant supervision.

We had Barkley neutered after 2 years old. Made zero difference. I've read (most likely here at GRF) that by that age their personalities, traits, behaviors, and so on have been cast and neutering usually doesn't change anything. Training can. After having learned that and more about neutering, I always felt bad about having him neutered - there wasn't really a need to.

Like the experienced people have said above, follow through on the training. You and him can do it. Good luck!


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you for taking the time to respond! Yes it seems he really needed a good trainer at 8 months. That is where it started. 
All of the information I'm getting is giving me great reassurance that the decision I made to have a good private trainer come to the house is the correct one. He coming to the house at least 2 times a week and we are already making progress. 
We are definitely all on board, taking this very seriously and all involved in training. Of course there is no more rough housing, yelling, running, NO hands on the dog, etc. When we play with him it's outside with his toy and he drops it before we throw it for him to fetch. 
That is adorable that your grandson can get your golden to listen to him. I can't wait until our dog is well trained! I am also starting to educate myself on dog language so that I can better understand what he's trying to tell us.


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you! Yes the training is going well so far and I'm so happy that we can turn this around. Still always knowing that he can bite again so being very diligent. We are all taking the training very seriously and learning a lot. Thank you for your encouragement!! I LOVE your pictures.


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## DblTrblGolden2 (Aug 22, 2018)

Goldielover123 said:


> Thank you! Yes the training is going well so far and I'm so happy that we can turn this around. Still always knowing that he can bite again so being very diligent. We are all taking the training very seriously and learning a lot. Thank you for your encouragement!! I LOVE your pictures.


Thank you for the comment about my Grandson. It is cute. We also have an 8 year old Golden that didn't really care for a baby being around. I don't think he had ever been close to one until my Grandson. It took us a solid year after my grandson started walking of slowly allowing Duke, our 8 year old, around our Grandson. I started with him always on a leash. Duke is a professionally trained field dog. We still had to teach him appropriate behavior.

My Grandson lives with my son who has a 93# lab that is solid muscle, also field trained. He just got an 8 week old puppy. Field dogs are higher strung, and my sons are really high strung. Without training and obedience I don't think he could have them in the house. We are all already teaching the puppy not to bite, here, sit, and to retrieve little paint rollers. 

I just wanted to give you an idea of the training that goes into a well mannered dog because I don't think people realize when they see one how it got that way. We start as soon as they come home. It's fun, but they are learning. We normally do little 5-10 minute sessions when they are really little and incorporate it into play. By the time they are 3-4 months we are doing 3 15-20 minute leash, and basic obedience session a day. In addition to that if it's nice they are learning to swim and retrieve, which expels excess energy. By the time my newest addition was 6 months he would heal off leash, sit, down, and stay, and most importantly come when called or I blew a whistle. My two commands that are game changers are HERE and SIT. If I say HERE, they should be running, if I say SIT, they should drop to their butt. I'm the softest, most loving dog owner you'll ever meet. My dogs sleep in my bedroom. I want them trained so that they can be a great addition to our family. I don't want to have to lock them up when company comes.

You can save your dog. It will take time and dedication. Your daughter can learn to be a great dog owner. It sounds like you are headed in the right direction, but make sure that whatever the trainer is teaching your reinforcing several times a day. Twice a week will never fix this problem.

The one other tip I can offer is that you want to be the most interesting thing to your dog. Training isn't all about correction, some of it is about building a relationship. I will say that there are things that require correction, and it's harder to change behavior then do it from the beginning.

We owned a very challenging Irish Setter years ago. Both my boys were little at the time. We took him to a private trainer that offered obedience classes twice a week in a group setting. It did nothing for this guy. When he was around 4 and we figured out age wasn't going to help our problems we got serious about training. He lived to be very old and was a great dog. He was good enough that his last four years of life he went to work with me everyday. He laid by my desk. They can learn at any age!!


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you so much for your thoughtful response. Yes everything you said makes sense! It's all coming together now and we as a family understand how we've created this - one my daughter engaging in this type of activity and two my husband and I letting it happen. This latest incident shook us all up for days and now we are totally on board to work hard to change it.

She has stopped ALL of the previous behavior and is committed to changing their relationship. We just didn't understand what and why this was happening, but through talking to the behaviorist vet, another vet (friend of ours), 2 excellent in home dog trainers, this forum and the internet we now understand what to do. 

Yes we all 4 need to be on board with training this dog and all be on the same page. There is a lot of work to do and I've told the family we either commit to doing the work or we will have to get rid of him. 

Thank you for taking the time out to read and respond to my post!


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Wow! What a thoughtful helpful note. Thank you so much. I'm putting these posts on word documents and printing them to share with the family! Yes I'm going to have us each put a note on our calendar of minutes trained so we can all be accountable and so that I know we are all putting the time in. Little by little it will get done.

I am super excited about our future with this beautiful sweet dog. You sound like you have a wonderful full life with your fur babies.


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you for your thoughts. My husband and I now realize we let this situation happen and feel absolutely horrible about it!! As they ran around the house together it seemed they were playing. Yes at times it definitely got out of control, especially when she would slam the door and we’d tell her to take it outside, but we never realized we were creating this nightmare. After the first terrible bite we started working with a vet behaviorist and changed a number of things. I think what happened is that slowly we let things slide. She never did take a toy from his mouth again, but it was the being riled up and then shoving him off of her when he was humping her that set him off. It had been 7 months and we all thought we were past him biting. 

I’ve learned so much now and realize how we’ve caused this.  Now we realize this can happen again and are totally on board to completely change how she interacts with him as well as commit to having a trainer come to the house a few times week until he is not needed. My daughter is very committed to this as well and has stopped all previous behavior. We are all committed to training him and he will be our beloved pet for many years to come.


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you so much to everyone who responded. 

We've learned a lot as a family and realize we created this situation. Our house is a much calmer place. We have an excellent trainer we are working with and the whole family is committed to putting in the daily work of training, guiding and loving our beloved Golden. 

We are hopeful we will turn this around and have a long and full live with our Jay Jay.


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

Goldielover123, you are to be commended for having taken the feedback here with such an open mind. It's not always easy to hear that it was perhaps something you or your family did that caused the behaviour. But you took it in the constructive manner it was given and it is so good to see that you all are open to change and are working with a trainer now. I really hope this works out in the end for your family and your dog.


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## debbie624 (Aug 10, 2018)

Goldielover123, I also want to commend you because it is hard to take feedback, especially accepting your family's role in what is happening. I think you are doing a great job following through and it is clear how committed you are to your dog and how much you love him. I have a new puppy who is now 12 weeks old, Coco. I am struggling with her attacking of me whenever I walk into a room. A book my breeder sent home with us called Puppy Possibliities, which is positive reinforcement, suggests to lay puppy on back and hold scruff on side of neck and stare them in the eye when they bite uncontrollably after trying to correct and redirect does not work. We tried this for a very short time and everyone here has cautioned me not to do this as did our vet. So we stopped. She unfortunately is biting more. She is great with commands such as sit, come, and I say sit to redirect her when she is attacking and then give her a treat when she sits. Or give her a toy instead of biting me. It works temporarily. I too get frustrated. I am hoping to hire an in person trainer bc something I am doing obviously isn't working. Maybe because I respond to it with a no, or a yell and she thinks I am playing. Its hard not to respond when the biting hurts and is sudden. I am curious for those of you here who talk about fair trade. I have always felt it is important to teach the dog when a puppy to share so we take a bone or a toy away in a loving way, not provoking way, and really praise her when we do it because she lets us. We have always done this and it has always worked. Is this ok? What is fair trade?


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## Anele (Dec 12, 2014)

Whew. As a parent of 5, my heart stopped reading how your older daughter interacted with your dog. It is a shame that when he told her "Enough" that he didn't have great bite inhibition to not have caused the puncture wounds, however. I am glad your family accepts the responsibility of creating this and has made a solid commitment to fixing this serious problem. 

On the plus side, it is VERY possible to keep things 100% respectful toward your dog, going forward. You should be extremely proud of the changes you have made.


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## Anele (Dec 12, 2014)

debbie624 said:


> I am struggling with her attacking of me whenever I walk into a room. A book my breeder sent home with us called Puppy Possibliities, which is positive reinforcement, suggests to lay puppy on back and hold scruff on side of neck and stare them in the eye when they bite uncontrollably after trying to correct and redirect does not work.


This is absolutely not positive reinforcement. I am glad you stopped. You are doing the right thing by consistently redirecting. Remember to give your puppy frequent naps, times for settling down in the crate. Overtired = bitey puppy. If you know of a GREAT adult dog for her to play with, that helps, too. (Our 2nd dog never bit our skin-- even as a puppy-- and I think it's because he had another dog to interact with.)

Resource guarding is way easier to prevent vs manage. Don't worry about "fair." Worry about making your dog feel safe. A dog who feels safe is much less likely to bite or guard. (Tying this back to the OP... her dog didn't feel safe.) Consistently trade for something of higher value, but even then, don't overdo it, because it's annoying! (Would you like someone to interrupt you every time you ate or snacked?) Yes, there WILL be times when it's an emergency and you can take something without a trade, but you will have built up so much TRUST that it will be fine. But do not make your dog feel nervous you will take something because then YOU are causing a big problem.


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## Jeff s. (May 5, 2019)

Seems you may have that one in a thousand golden that is vicious. He has attacked three times your kids. I don’t care what training you give him, it will happen again. Put this animal down before he does some serious damage.


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## Jane (Jan 2, 2013)

When my Crispin was about 4 mos. old, he growled at me when I reached to take a bone from him (which was probably dumb). I backed off, and left him alone with his bone (which I think was a good instinct). At that time we were still actively in puppy training classes run by an excellent trainer, and I mentioned this to her at our next class. 

She immediately said "this is serious" and set up some private sessions with me and my puppy. I had to set up a hierarchy of Crispin's "favorite things" and practice, several times a day, giving Crispin a treat, then offering to trade him for a higher-value treat, then praising him effusively, and giving him back the original treat.

Luckily it was not long before little Crispin would park himself at my feet whenever he had a bone or chewy treat, offering it to me so that I could give him a better treat and then give him his original treat back. I had to keep treats by my favorite chair. This was a few years ago, so I cannot remember the exact sequence of how I eased up on training, but Crispin will let me take anything from him now; however, I only test him from time to time, and I always reward him for passively allowing me to do this. He's a good boy.

He has never evidenced any resource-guarding tendencies again (well, at least not with humans, and not seriously with other dogs, fortunately). And, by the way, he's not neutered, and he's now six.

Granted, he was just a baby puppy then, and my trainer was always thankful that we had "nipped it in the bud." But I think a Golden is usually, basically, a very good-natured dog--but they are dogs, with razor-sharp teeth to defend themselves, and it's critical never to forget that, and never to place them and you in situations where you and they are not safe. If I had continued trying to take things from Crispin without the training I was directed to conduct--and did conduct--he might have bitten me. Fortunately I listened to the signals he was giving me (grrrr), backed off, and talked to my trainer. 

Best of luck to you and your family.


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## Mde13004 (Feb 20, 2019)

I am so happy for you and your family!! Its great to hear that your family is taking this training seriously and are working hard to keep him in your family. I give you a lot of credit for putting in the hard work to FIX the issue because most people would just get rid of their dog and not accept responsibility. Wishing you and your family the best of luck


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## Goldielover123 (Feb 6, 2018)

Thank you for your encouragement. It is hard to take feedback especially now realizing we actually let this happen! Ugh! 
When Jay Jay was 8 weeks old and we just got him he would bite our ankles as well. He was so tiny and cute the girls would run around the backyard with him chasing them. We thought it was funny and that he was trying to play - except when he would catch you and those tiny needle teeth would penetrate. It didn't happen quite as often as it is to you, but never the less you don't want it to get out of control. 
I think you are right on track with having a trainer come to the house and work with you. It really helps to have them explain the dogs behavior, why he is doing it and what can you do positively to correct it. 
My understanding of fair trade (and I'm no expert) is if your dog is chewing on a shoe, trade the shoe for a super yummy appropriate chew (maybe a bully stick or equally awesome item). It’s important that you have chews that your dog finds interesting and desirable, otherwise, the fair trade will not work. 
I would start a separate thread with your exact issue and I bet you'll get some great ideas on what to do. Again a good in house trainer is the best. 
I wish you luck with your new puppy! You sound like you're on the right track!


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