# Golden jealousy



## RedDogs (Jan 30, 2010)

This is not jealousy, this is your dog not knowing how to interact with the new people. Structure interactions. Your visitors can ask for sits or downs or do some play fetching. And then you can gate your dog in another room with a good chew toy (stuffed-frozen-kong) so that she doesn't have the opportunity to practice behaviors you don't like and she doesn't spend time stressed.


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Thank you for your quick response. That does make sense to structure interaction!

I do think it is also a jealousy issue. My buddies come over, no problem. Women... forget it. Also, before Marianne came over, she meet Shelby in a park and we threw her chuck it balls. She was well behaved, but when she saw us holding hands she ran back, got behind us and started knudging our hands as if to say 'stop that!'. Doesn't that sound like jealousy? I didn't mention but Shelby had cancer (papillary squamous cell carcinoma) less than a year ago, it was cut out and hasn't returned. I believe our bond is that much stronger due to her ordeal as it was a major 5 hour surgery.


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## C's Mom (Dec 7, 2009)

I have no advice and I'm sure her behavior needs to be fixed but I couldn't help smiling while reading about her trying to get between you and your girlfriends....I know, I know...it's wrong but I can't help myself! 

Perhaps when Shelby meets a woman you bring home and doesn't behave this way then this new woman is a keeper?


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## wenryder (Oct 21, 2010)

C's Mom said:


> Perhaps when Shelby meets a woman you bring home and doesn't behave this way then this new woman is a keeper?


Hehehehe........

Sorry I have no advice. I know that's not helpful at all.


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

Daisy does the same thing, with men. I think she's just not used to me being physically close to someone. She's comfortable with people, has no problem with visitors ... it's only with body contact that she reacts. 

I'd really like to know what she's thinking. If it's not jealousy, what is it?


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Jo Ellen said:


> Daisy does the same thing, with men. I think she's just not used to me being physically close to someone. She's comfortable with people, has no problem with visitors ... it's only with body contact that she reacts.


Maybe you and I, Shelby and Daisy should all get together and see if it cancels out!


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

Shelby's Dad said:


> Maybe you and I, Shelby and Daisy should all get together and see if it cancels out!


That was funny


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

LOL....New Jersey and PA not that far apart!!!


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Jo Ellen said:


> That was funny


So where are you in central PA? I'm just outside of Philly.

Ya never know!


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

I think Shelby and Daisy need a play date


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

janine said:


> I think Shelby and Daisy need a play date


That was funny too!


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## GoldensGirl (Aug 2, 2010)

I'll suggest another take on this situation. My Goldens (especially the late Sabrina) are excellent judges of character and they watch over me protectively. If they give someone "The Butt" or refuse to deal with them, I figure I've got a loser in the house. This has ended more than one almost-budding relationship, but I figure that was probably for the best. As one guy observed, around here it's "Love me, love my dogs." The fur-kids would say "Goldens Rule!" 

Lucy


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## AlanK (Jun 28, 2008)

Aside from the slight issue of Golden attachment and slight jealousy:uhoh:

This is a fun thread 

Shelby's Dad I would guess things will improve with time.!!


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

Well this looks familiar, maybe it's a golden thing


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

AlanK said:


> Aside from the slight issue of Golden attachment and slight jealousy:uhoh:
> 
> This is a fun thread
> 
> Shelby's Dad I would guess things will improve with time.!!


I hope so Alan! They are such incredible dogs. Yes I am concerned, but at the same time smiling.


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Jo Ellen said:


> Well this looks familiar, maybe it's a golden thing


 LOL! Yeah I guess so!


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

So, Shelby's Dad ... let us know how things improve with Shelby and the gf, and what you're doing that works. LOL, I could use some pointers


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

I love that movie...Brinkley was one handsome golden!! Maybe Daisy or Shelby need to hangout in Central Park


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Jo Ellen said:


> So, Shelby's Dad ... let us know how things improve with Shelby and the gf, and what you're doing that works. LOL, I could use some pointers


gf? What gf? oh yeah, her....
I just spoke it over with Shelby and she would like to play with Daisy


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

I will discuss this with Daisy


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

^^^ You've Got Mail


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Shelby is excited! Only 12 more days and she gets to play with Daisy! Woohoo!

What moron(s) would ban such a sweetheart, and valued member of this forum, just for voicing her opinion?


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

mee dadee no heere. daizee dadee is sayin we canne meet u's n mizz jo. sevin daze!


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## gold4me (Mar 12, 2006)

Shelbe I fink u needz tu bisit da dawgie shat!! I du I weely du.


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

Jo Ellen .... I didn't know you were banned!! I have missed you!!! ;-) Daisy I can't wait to hear about your play date with Shelby.


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## mybuddy (Mar 2, 2007)

tenshun! tenshun! da shelbee. yoo shud kom da dawgie shat cuz wee habering da kwissymuz partee n yoo imbited bout dis!

pweeze brink yer eddie bare

dis is da buddy n eye da propessor

ober n da owt bout dis.


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

gold4me said:


> Shelbe I fink u needz tu bisit da dawgie shat!! I du I weely du.


 tank wu. me dadee miss mizz jo


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

Daisy & Shelby....have fun tonight :


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

Experiment still in progress, stay tuned for further details


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## Shelby's Dad (Dec 16, 2010)

Daisy is awesome. Daisy's Mom is running a very close second


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## boomers_dawn (Sep 20, 2009)

Daisy and Shelby's playdate photos in the photo section are adorable.

As for the jealousy question, I don't think dogs feel the emotion jealousy, but I definitely think they sense a new person and dynamic entering their home and maybe experience some kind of shift in the "pack". Shelby probably has an instinct to assert her place in the pack - next to you.

I have a man friend who comes over sometimes and both mine try to insert themselves between us all the time. I don't see it as jealous or malicious, just them trying to hang onto their role or their place in our little society here at home.

I think you do the right thing with the leash and would say just reinforce basic manners and boundaries. You don't want to displace her but she does need to recognize her role - the dog - not the equal or superior to the person visiting.


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## mylissyk (Feb 25, 2007)

Jo Ellen said:


> Experiment still in progress, stay tuned for further details



Hahahahahaha! We have our very own soap opera going on!


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

This is all very interesting. Shelby's Dad (Paul) and Daisy are upstairs sleeping. Shelby and me are downstairs watching TV together on the couch.

Both dogs are very much a challenge, but maybe it's easier when there's another dog to focus on instead of just one new person? 

I honestly expected Daisy to be jealous of Shelby but I haven't seen that at all. I am really amazed at how easy it has been to bring another dog into our home. 

LOL, and here I am feeling a little bit jealous myself that Daisy is upstairs without me! :bowl:


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## janine (Aug 8, 2009)

So Daisy really likes Paul 

Daisy where is your loyalty? :


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## Joanne & Asia (Jul 23, 2007)

This is a soap opera and I love it. Waiting for the next update!


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## Jo Ellen (Feb 25, 2007)

Next update ...

Shelby has really taken to humping me :curtain: What's up with this? Paul left for a bit to go to the store and immediately Shelby started with me. And she did this quite a few more times before Paul came back. And then again as soon as he came in.

I'm not familiar with this behavior, can someone lend some ideas? What is it about and what do I do about it? Do I do something myself or let Paul handle it when he's here?


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## perdie (Oct 30, 2008)

That really brought a smile to my face( sorry!)the bit about staring at you&your girlfriend, my golden is the same Im ashamed to say lol
At one point (and sometimes he'll still do it)he wouldnt even let me sit next to my son! He'd climb on top of us lol, if we tried hugging he'd jump up and bark like crazy, he'd grab my sleeves to get me away then demand strokes!
Ive mostly erradicated it now (although he does do the psycho stare still) by challenging him, all's we did was to say no, move forward toward him to make him move back(claiming space)sit,stay command,repeat,repeat,repeat,then continue hugging etc We did create lots of situations to drive it home that mum&son can sit next to each and even hug without a 32kg bundle of golden fur climbing all over us!


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