# any advice on a grieving golden



## Karen519 (Aug 21, 2006)

*Ifresa*

Ifresa

My Hubby and I have had 2 dogs for the past 25 years and when one dies the one left behind always grieves.

Spend time with your six year old, walking her, tossing a ball, taking her to see other relatives friends that have dogs, and see if that helps.

When you are ready for another Golden, if you are adopting, remember to take her with you to meet the new dog.


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## Bender (Dec 30, 2008)

She knows. Talk to her, spend some time with her and do some special things. Go for a walk or shopping to get a treat. She'll come around in her own time.


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## tippykayak (Oct 27, 2008)

Get her out of the house, and give her a job. Just like people, dogs cope better when they have something positive to invest in.

A "job" can mean fetch somewhere other than the yard, an obedience or agility class, a therapy dog gig with some kids, a visit to home depot to play ambassador, a hike someplace new, etc.

I'm so sorry you had to put down your older dog. 14 is a wonderful age for a Golden to live to, but the hole in your life isn't any smaller because of it.

Don't rush to get a new pup, but don't hesitate either. When we lost our six-year-old to lymphoma, I didn't feel "ready" right away, but our next pup kind of dropped into our lap four months later. Our breeder had a nasty break in her arm and couldn't keep up with training pups, so she called us and asked if she could place one with us. Well, as soon as the little hellion was in the house, I was ready for him.

A well-trained six year old can be a wonderful mentor to a pup, and a new pup won't "distract" you from your grief or "replace" your older dog. So don't think you have to be totally fine before you get another dog. Grief is just the other side of joy, so a puppy can be a wonderful companion in that process.

So don't let anybody push you into getting a new pup, but don't hesitate either if the right breeder has the right litter.


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## cubbysan (Mar 13, 2007)

Years ago I had a two year old GSD who witnessed losing my other dog to an accident. He just sat on the top of our stairs, looking down at the rest of the house for about two weeks - until we brought home another dog.

If we were busy playing with him, he seemed okay, but when we weren't this is what he did.

I wonder if it would be easier for him if you took the bed away, so the smell of your bridge dog is not there. 

When I had to put down my 13 year old pyr, Brady was only 7 months, and it did not seem to bother him. I had Goliath's collar in my car, when my daughter brought it in the house, Brady went running across the room, and tried to grab it from her, and cried. I will never forget that, so we put the collar away, so he could no longer smell it.


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## Dallas Gold (Dec 22, 2007)

We went through this last year when we lost our almost 13 year old to cancer and his little 6 year old brother Toby went into intense grief. We weren't ready for a new dog and sometimes bringing a new one in right away is harder for the resident dog. We just weren't prepared for that emotionally. We did that after we lost our first golden and it was a huge mistake in retrospect. 

Our 6 year old was hypothyroid and the levels went into a tailspin during his grief. We spent some time dealing with that. After 6 months he started acting more like himself. Our vet and most of the research I saw online suggested grief for a few months is normal. If it continues and you are worried you might want to get a veterinary exam to be on the safe side. Our vet believes that grief can affect a dog's health, especially hormone levels. She's seen it in her practice. It happened to us so I believe it.

We spent a lot of one on one time with him since losing his sibling and he absolutely blossomed. He relishes his spoiled dog position in the house. We still aren't ready to add a new dog to our mix because we are just enjoying Toby so much. 

There are some stickys in the Grief section regarding pets grieving pets that may be helpful to you:
http://www.goldenretrieverforum.com.../86935-pet-loss-resource-sites-care-help.html
and particularly:
02 Grieving: When Your Dog Mourns the Loss of Another Dog - VeterinaryPartner.com - a VIN company!


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## Sweet Girl (Jun 10, 2010)

I'm so sad for both you and your 6 year old. I think you've had some good advice here. I guess I'd try to get her out and play and take her mind off things. It's clear she does know and is missing him - same as you. I hope you can both provide comfort to each other.


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## 58loosy (Apr 18, 2010)

It is sad for everyone. We had to put our 12 yr. old down from a break from bone cancer we didn't know she had, our springer went into a depression started loosing hair, we just hardly ever left her alone, she went everywhere with us, about 7 mos. later after months of researching for a good breeder, we got Lucy when we brought her home it was immediate love, the pics of them playing tag immediately, they play all the time, right now they are on the couch wrestling. Our springer is 10 and Lucy has made her a pup again. Now he is grooming her, so cute. I know someday you will bring in another pup and your golden will love him or her.


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## Debles (Sep 6, 2007)

Our Gunner who is now 8 is still missing our Selka who died almost 7 months ago . We have a an almost seven month old puppy whom he has accepted but sometimes he comes and lays his head on my lap or crawls up on me to be cuddled (which he didn't do before) and I know he is missing Selka so much. Selka was with him his entire life. I still miss him so , it is natural that Gunner would too.
Everyone gave good advice. As long as he is eating and still willing to play with you and go for walks, that is a good thing.


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## Looni2ns (Mar 26, 2010)

It just takes time, and patience. Jessie still has her moments, and it was a year on the 23rd that we lost Gracie. You have to keep them busy, walking, talking, consoling each other (you're grieving, too). All of the girls lost their appetite, moped around, needed extra attention for weeks. Eventually, they came out of it, as spring came and there were more things to do outside.


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## lfresa (Feb 21, 2011)

Thanks everyone for your advice. My son has her this weekend because I had to go away for two days so he is taking her everyone where with him. Can't wait to get home to her.


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## Jean_NJ (Dec 15, 2010)

Our 4 year old cocker is mourning the loss of our golden too. He's bringing his ball to Duncan's favorite spots. When it is quiet he just mopes around the house. I am signing him up for an obedience class, but in the meanwhile trying to get him out alot and changing the scenery. I alternate between a nearby reservoir, and a state park. I then usually follow it up with a visit to one of the pet stores in the area. 

He's doing ok, but clearly missing his buddy. Also making sure we give him an extra bit of love.


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