# Sienna is at the Rainbow Bridge



## Whill381 (Jun 26, 2007)

Hi Everyone,

I haven't posted here much, just lurked and read about any possible health problems golden's may have with their hearts. This is going to be a longgg post, I apologize. I have a lot to say and it may help others in the future.

In May we thought she was having Seizures. By the end of June we learned the area around her heart was filling up with fluid. We had that drained and she was like a new dog. Those weren't seizures! She was passing out from lack of oxygen to the brain!

So, we knew what signs to watch for and we knew getting the fluid drained again could be an option in the future. 

On Friday, we noticed her breathing heavily...a different kind of breathing. Her entire diaphram was pumping hard. We made an appt and took her in for an ultrasound. Turns out, she had a 7 centimeter mass growing fast on her heart. The doctor said she probably had a couple weeks. She wasn't in pain, we could take her home and play it all by ear.

She was good over the weekend...still had the odd breathing, but she was eating and playing and sleeping well. Yesterday morning, same deal. Slower...but happy and wagging.

By 2PM things had REALLY changed. She started the "shuffle." When she had pain around her heart, she couldn't lay down..she'd just stand and shuffle. She didn't want me there to touch her...she's shuffle away. But, if I went somewhere she couldn't see me, she'd come looking for me. Then, it's like she had to lay down. She was in horrible shape, she started grunting a bit. 

By then, I had called my husband to come home. He called the vet and they were expecting us WHENEVER we could get there.

So...the moral of my LONG story is (that may hopefully help someone else), I want to stress how at PEACE I feel today. Since May, we knew the end was coming. We did all we could for her. We had her treated for as long as her quailty of life was good. We enjoyed EVERY DAY to the fullest. We had another whole summer with her. Car rides, trips to the lake, boat rides, short walks, snuggles, and chats. I told her each day how much I loved her and how she was "Just the girl I always wanted."

I held her face in my hands and just looked at her. I asked her if she was ready, I told her we'd help her. I could see it all in her pretty brown eyes.

We never wanted her to hurt or be in pain..the choice was CLEAR to us.

We got her to the vet around 3:30 and we sat with her. As soon as she was laying down in the room with us talking to her, she was so much calmer. Like "They are going to do someting for me!" Our doctor (who has been sooo wonderful) came in to tell us how this would go. He got a little moist eyed and said "I'm even getting emotional...she's been such a sweet girl." We had a few more minutes, a little more loving, she was laying on her side but giving us the paw...more petting, more petting. Her eyes were moving, she was listening to us...but all of us were ready.

The vet came in to give her the shot and it was truly amazing. I had one hand petting her head and one hand on her heart...it had been working so hard, I wanted to feel it get lighter & less stressed as she faded away. My husband had his hands by her nose so she could smell familiar things. And seriously...in 10-11 seconds, she was gone. 

It is the best thing we could have done for her. It was the easiest thing for all of us. I didn't want her to suffer another minute. I have never had to put a beloved pet to sleep before and as sad as I am, my heart is sooo much lighter. I dreaded yesterday for a long time...but it was the RIGHT thing to do. 

She was just over 10...we've had her since a couple weeks after coming home from our honeymoon. She was my heart, she was the best girl ever. This post may sound like I'm not sad. That's not true. But there's sooo much to be said for doing the right thing at the right time. There will never be another Sienna and I will miss so many things about her. Having her greet us with wags every time we came home, listening to her chatter about her day (she was a talker..not really a barker), and she had the most expressive face ever. I'll even miss the way she smelled. Her regular dog smell was nice. I could go on and on...but I already have!!! 

She spent 10 years filling us with happiness and she wouldn't want us to be sad now. It's hard to go home to an empty house. But...the shape she was in 24 hours ago? That could NOT go on...and this was all meant to be.

There will be another golden for us one day. I hope she's half as wonderful as our Sienna. In the meantime...I hope my Sienna is playing happily with everyone else's fur babies, at the Rainbow Bridge today. I hope when she got to the bridge, she looked back at us, gave a wag and a bark...and went on her way.

For those of you who have lost a dog, and those of you who will lose a dog (that covers us all), I hope you follow your gut and pay attention to your wonderful furry companion as we did. And I hope it brings you peace. I am filled with sadness, but my sadness comes out of selfish reasons, wanting to keep Sienna with us forever. That's just not realistic.

Thank you for reading. Everyone, please...give your dogs an extra hug today and tell them you love them. It's so important.

Here's a picture taken just yesterday morning. Shocking how fast it all spiraled. But, fast is the way to go!

My Sienna. At the Bridge. Rest in Peace my good girl...you'll be in our hearts forever.

Sienna - June 27, 1997 to September 18, 2007.

Wendy


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## LibertyME (Jan 6, 2007)

Thank you for posting...
Your sweetie was one well loved dog...


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## TheHooch (May 9, 2007)

Posting through many tears here. I have had to make that decision in the past it is not the easiest of things to do. Your girl was blessed to have you guys and the care that you gave her.


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## Oaklys Dad (Dec 28, 2005)

So sorry to here of your tragic loss. It is never easy to let one go especially a beauty like her. I hope when you feel you can you open your heart to another golden girl.


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## sharlin (Feb 26, 2007)

My deepest sympathies to you and your family. Bless you for giving this beautiful girl a wonderful life full of love and devotion. Sienna waits patiently at the Bridge for you to join her - happy, healthy and knowing how much you loved her.


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## ty823 (Feb 7, 2006)

So sorry for your loss. Very nice story.


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## Saca (May 20, 2007)

We went through a similar situation this May, but only had over a month before we had to release our girl to the Bridge. It was done with love, compassion and yes, grief too. Sage is showing Sienna all of the good parts up there-which would be everything. 
My heart goes out to you at this difficult time.
Saca, Cahilll, our new puppy, Chase, and Sage at the Bridge


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## Carsonsdaddy (Nov 1, 2006)

I am so sorry for your loss. We lost a year old lab mix to a heart problem, I know you can feel helpless.....Our thought's and prayers are with you.


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## GoldenDaisy (Jul 16, 2007)

So Sorry for the loss of your beautiful Sienna. It's never easy to let our golden ones go to the bridge, but you did a great thing for her, she is no longer suffering. I know your story only too well as I had to help my 3 1/2 year old Daisy to the Bridge in April this year, she also had terminal cancer. They touch our lives so deeply and will forever be in our hearts. I hope someday you will open your heart again to another golden, they renew so much of that joy, we got another golden, Boomer 3 weeks ago and he has brought us so much joy. Take care.


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## Whill381 (Jun 26, 2007)

Aww..thanks everyone.

I had it all together writing my post...but reading replies and getting "sympathy" sure makes me tear up.

We were SOOO lucky to have Sienna. We had to do right by her in the end.

I hope Sienna is with Sage, Skyler, Daisy and Katie...with ALL of them. I've read your stories too...but knowing Sienna's time we coming, it was hard for me to post. (In hindsight...selfish. I'm sorry...) When they are sooo young like Daisy and Katie, it's especially tough. We had 10+ years of love.

Wendy


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## moverking (Feb 26, 2007)

I'm having a little trouble typing ....your post was so heartfelt, and my neart hurts with you. Rest well, Sienna, you are so loved.
_And if I go,
while you're still here...
Know that I live on,
vibrating to a different measure
--behind a thin veil you cannot see through.
You will not see me,
so you must have faith.
I wait for the time when we can soar together again,
--both aware of each other.
Until then, live your life to its fullest.
And when you need me,
Just whisper my name in your heart,
...I will be there. _


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## GoldRocksMom (Feb 9, 2007)

god speed to the bridge Sienna
my heartfelt condolences...
what a gorgeous very loved golden girl


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## mylissyk (Feb 25, 2007)

My deepest sympathies. What a wonderful tribute to your lovely girl though, and you loving her so much to give her the very best, even when it meant leaving you. I know you miss her, I hope you can smile at her memories even if you smile through tears.


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## timm (Jan 7, 2007)

very sad for you, your story was moving, katie died suddenly, we did not see her in pain or suffering so I can't imagine how difficult that must be, but it really just sucks that we all have to go through these times, especially since we love them so much, we dont want them to go but we dont want them to suffer either so your decision is understandable.. I have no dog anymore so all I can do is hug my wife and be happy I have her  take care of yourself


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## Abbydabbydo (Jan 31, 2007)

I am so sorry for your loss. You are very brave and your girl was well loved. It's OK to grieve.


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## Tahnee GR (Aug 26, 2006)

I am so sorry for your loss. Sienna was just beautiful! It is never easy to lose them, no matter what their age or how prepared we think we are.

In the end, you gave her the best gift possible, a painless and peaceful departure, with you and your husband with her.


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## arcane (Sep 18, 2007)

Wendy
I am so sorry for your loss..Sienna is now at peace. There are many loving wonderful goldens at the bridge to welcome her...our bobbie sox is one...may your grief soon be replaced with precious memories

hugs to you


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## Sunshine Goldens (Oct 31, 2005)

She was a beautiful girl. I am so sorry for your pain.


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## Brandy's Mom (Oct 5, 2005)

Your love and devotion for Sienna come through loud and clear. I am very sorry for your loss.


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## Nugget9806 (Aug 10, 2007)

You are in my thoughts. I know how difficult this time is. My Nugget had an enlarged heart. He showed no signs until the end. Within hours of the signs presenting I was giving the ok to end the suffering and say goodbye. The vet told me that meds would only prolong the inevidible and that he would never be the same.


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## Lego&Jacub (Jul 18, 2006)

I'm sorry that Sienna is gone... but I am soo happy that your post is such a positive one. She sounds truely fully loved... and how beautiful that you were both there to help her end her pain.

(((HUGS)))


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## Wrigley's Mom (Nov 6, 2006)

What a beautiful tribute to Sienna. She was so lucky to have you as parents as you were lucky to have her for 10 fun, love-filled years. I was in tears reading your post and hearing of your unselfish love for Sienna. You were her angels while she was sick and she's your angel now. 

Hugs and condolences to you and your husband. I know you have many happy memories to help you through this difficult time.


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## threegoldengirls (Mar 1, 2006)

I'm so sorry for your loss. Thoughts and prayers are with you.


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## Jazzys Mom (Mar 13, 2007)

My heart is with you. I have been there as so many here on this forum have. Sienna was well loved and rest assured you will see her again.

She walks beside you, just on silent paws now

Prayers for you and your family
Jazzys Mom


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## Nicci831 (Aug 9, 2007)

Thank you for sharing Sienna's beautiful life, and with a beautiful loving owner =) All my fur babies that have passed will take good care of her =)


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## GoldenJoyx'stwo (Feb 25, 2007)

My thoughts and prayers are with you and your family...


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## Whill381 (Jun 26, 2007)

All the kind words are sooo helpful. Thank you. I could say something about everyone's post but then you'd be getting another long one from me. (Ugh!)

Moverking, I love your poem...and I LOVE the photo in your signature line. Those 2 are SWEET. We've often thought about getting 2, similar in age.

And Jazzy's mom, you put it just right. She walks beside us still...always...just on silent paws now.

Timm...I hope you and your wife do get another golden soon. We will...but it takes time. Maybe spring when it's a better time for potty training!

It's amazing...soo many of our goldens with heart problems. Young ones and old ones. Such a wonderful loving gentle breed, with so many struggles.

Thank you for all the kind words and thoughts...
Wendy


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## gold4me (Mar 12, 2006)

I am very touched by your post and find tears in my eyes. She is beautiful and obviously was well loved. She is young and pain free now playing with all of our goldens that have gone to the Rainbow Bridge. Your time will come when another golden will fill your heart with love. My husband and I have had to send 3 precious goldens to the Rainbow Bridge. It is NEVER easy and always they leave a hole in our hearts.


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## Merlins mom (Jun 20, 2007)

I'm so sorry for your loss. Sienna was lucky to have so much love. Thanks for your post.


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## Heidi36oh (Feb 27, 2007)

So sorry for your loss, she was a beautiful girl. I know it's hard at first we lost our Spice this February to cancer but it gets a little easier with time.
I'm sure Sienna and Spice are playing at the bridge without pain.
Thoughts and prayers are with you.


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## BeauShel (May 20, 2007)

Wendy,
I am so sorry to read that your lost Sienna but you tribute to her was so moving and beautiful. As you know I am having seizures with Beau and reading your post just made me start crying and have to go and hug my big guy. You and your husband are in my thoughts and prayers. she is at the bridge playing with all of our pups until you can be together again. Sienna is a beautiful girl and I can see the love in her eyes that she has for you. Rest in peace sweet girl. 
Thank you for sharing your story with us and know we are there for you if you want to chat.


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## MelissaH (Jul 27, 2007)

She was such a beautiful girl...that face says it all. I know your pain all too well and my prayers are with you and your family. It is the hardest thing when we lose something that we love so much.


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## Sivin (Nov 23, 2006)

My thoughts are with you, and in Sienna's memory, may you one day get another golden puppy.
Helaine


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## Maggies mom (Jan 6, 2006)

I so sorry for your loss...I know she had a wonderful life and she loved you guys just as much as you loved her......


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## Hudson (May 18, 2005)

Sienna was very lucky and blessed to have such a wonderful life surrounded with love, your tribute to Sienna shows how devoted you were to her..
I know how painful it is to loose your beloved Sienna I too lost Jessie,.... it is with love you say goodbye, so that they do not suffer,...Sienna will be at the bridge and waiting with our departed,never forgotten furbabies.RIP Sweet Sienna


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## Gwen (Aug 9, 2007)

Reading your story just brought back memories of our beloved, Becky, who crossed over the Rainbow Bridge in March 2007. Although it is a very difficult decision to make, it is one that is MOST humane. I say congratulations to you & your family for approaching this time in a most mature way. I know that Sienna was saying "Thanks" to you. 

When I was leaving the vet clinic after Becky had passed away, my 26 year old son & I were both bawling our eyes out. But then I heard a voice saying "I'm ok now" and then I felt ok. Yes, we still miss her even after 6 months has passed but I hope that I'll always have the wonderful memories of her. I will always keep that picture of her at age 13 after rolling in the snow with a look of mischief on her face - that's my Becky! 

Keep the memories alive and a big hug from Gwen, Oliver & Nygel!


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## kezia14 (Aug 12, 2007)

What a nice story !!!?
Maybe this one,
Warm Memories E-cards from PassionUp
Loss of Pet E-cards from PassionUp

IM SOO SORRY !!


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## Oralia Schatzman (Jun 12, 2006)

I am so sorry for the loss of your beautiful Sienna. Your story made me cry and I appreciate your courage for sharing so soon. I hope that I am as brave when it's Bentley's time.


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## Mersee (Feb 26, 2007)

Hi Wendy~
I am so glad I found your thread on Sienna. I don't get on here as much as I would like, but I remember your threads a couple of months ago regarding Sienna's siezures. I kept looking for updates, but didn't see any until today. Sienna's story is exactly the same as our beloved Sandi who we lost 2 years ago this past May. The fluid around the heart, the labored breathing, etc. The only thing different was that Sandi never had siezures. Sandi was 9 when she passed. I found her laying down with very labored breathing. I immediately took her to my vet who wasn't equipped to do anything more than surgery to see what the problem was. I took her to a excellent hospital about an hour away, and they drained the fluid around her heart. Like Sienna, she came home the next day like a new dog. They called us about a week later with the results of some tests that it was hemangiasarcoma, and that she had about 6 weeks. We were devesated, but Sandi looked and acted so good, that I was sure they made a mistake. Then almost 6 weeks to the day, she collapsed. I rushed her back to the hospital, and she died shortly after we got there. I feel like she saved us the grief of having to put her to sleep. My whole family was in a "funk" for weeks and weeks. I cry each time I read the stories about losing dogs on this site. It took us 9 months before we were ready, but we brought home another golden puppy, Daisy. Best wishes to you and your family. I could tell that Sienna was a lucky pup, and you were just as lucky to have her!

~Maria~


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## Big Mamoo (Jul 4, 2007)

So sorry to hear of your loss. We went through something similar in May with Kelly and cancer. Let the memories help you through the grief. Rest assured she's romping with all of our babies we've sent to the Bridge. Keep feeling and keep posting. It helps. When you guys are ready there's nothing like new golden love. That was our best therapy.


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## Whill381 (Jun 26, 2007)

Thank you so much to everyone who's posted kind words. It truly does mean so much, knowing everyone goes thru this, it's never easy, the range of emotion is ok and normal.

Maria...I want to thank you for your post, your silimar story with Sandi. Now that you mention it, I remember you posting before about "hemangiasarcoma" and I said I had no idea what that was. They never used any fancy words on Sienna! They used more basic words like "cystic mass" on her heart, "Dyspnea," and "Syncopy for the fainting, plus pericardial/pleural effusion for the build up of fluid. I just sort of assumed in my mind she was in the middle stages of congestive heart failure. 

I will do a search on hemangiasarcoma, I wonder if that's exactly what Sienna had. The cardio vet kept telling us that her fluid tested back clean though, nothing abnormal IN it.

For Sienna and Sandi, it's wonderful we were able to help them to a point. Diagnose a problem, and treat it for long enough for our babies to live a happy life for several weeks! Sandi got 6. Sienna got 10-11! I wouldn't trade that time for anything.

Thanks so much for sharing your story/thoughts. Have FUN with Daisy!! THe house is so empty, I'm not sure how long we'll be able to wait. My husband and I are talking about maybe rescuing a 2-3-4 year old golden girl this fall. Not YET. But, my house is not the same without a fur baby. I try not to feel guilty that we may get another dog kind of soon. Sienna added sooo much to our lives and we gave her a great one. Why beat ourselves up over a "waiting period" if we could help one of the thousands of rescue dogs in need.

It's a tough call right now...

Wendy


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## THE HONEY WOLVES (Jun 9, 2007)

every time I read this thread I relive a small moment of our own past losses and feel that pain in my gut and my eyes well up- So sorry - what a beautiful golden


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## Mersee (Feb 26, 2007)

Wendy~
You are right, it is a tough call. We thought about rescuing or adopting a dog, but after losing Sandi at what I thought was relatively young, we wanted to get a puppy to have for as long as possible. When I was researching and contacting breeders, I made sure that longevity was part of their breeding program. Daisy is great, it was so nice having a dog around (except for the hair) again, there was definitely a void. The puppy stage was a challenge, but fun. It had been so long since we had a puppy. I think about resucing another dog, but honestly, I am not sure about having 2 dogs. I know Daisy would love it, but it would be double the vet bills, boarding, food, etc, not to mention the hair again, lol. Daisy has alot of hair, and it is very long, so we constantly have tumble weeds of her hair floating around. I wish you the best of luck with whatever you decide, I am sure any dog would be lucky to be part of your family.


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## maggie1951 (Apr 20, 2007)

*Sienna*

So sorry to hear about Sienna.
I truely know how you feel as both my Meg and Sadie went down hill very suddenly one day having fun next day gone and i still miss them both very much.
You gave Sienna a good life now she can play at the bridge with Sadie and Meg.
And it made me cry as it brings back the memories of Sadie and Meg.
I am just thankfull i still have Daisy i got Daisy for company for Sadie when we lost Meg you can never replace them but when taking on a rescue you just feel your helping another dog that needs your help.

Maggie


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